---My career goal is to
becom a practical nursing because of my own personal experiences I have gone through .-My career goal is to become a practical nursing because of my personal experiences I have gone through.
gone through--There is no rule that always prohibits a sentence from ending with a preposition. If your reader is likely to believe this grammar myth, take care to avoid using phrasal verbs (such as agree to, plan on, or result in) at the end of a sentence. However, a simple reordering of the sentence may result in an overly stuffy or archaic feeling.
---Another reason is that
with my own eyes I saw the shortage-- delete that or rewrite it.
i decide that I am--.That's when I decide that I am
--- I am going to become some
sort of medical person but I was not certain at that time because trying to persue a career was impossible. I want to use my personal loss as a means to help others. In Addition , I grow up in a family where helping others was a key characteristic to have.------I am going to become some medical person, but I was not sure at that time because trying to pursue a career was impossible. I want to use my personal loss as a means to help others. Also, I grow up in a family where helping others was an essential characteristic to have.
It is good. But you should also write about your passion for medical science, to know more about the human body or life which drew you to become a doctor. Consider adding them.