Despite significant improvements in maternal and neo natal mortality in Zimbabwe over the last few years, the rates remain high. Development partners have and continue to make significant improvements towards this area with a recent focus on Health Systems Strengthening (HSS). As part of an interdisciplinary team at Clinton Health Access Initiatives, I am currently working on assisting the Ministry of Health on a number of HSS reforms that are aimed at addressing some of the challenges such as the health financing policy and strategy development, costing of health strategies such as child survival strategy, national health strategy and national malaria strategy and laying the groundwork for establishment of a National Health Insurance. Health sector reform is a long term process that demands commitment and passion towards saving lives.
Upon my return to Zimbabwe I intend to re-join the Clinton Health Access Initiatives and continue work in providing technical assistance to the Ministry of Health on the implementation of the National health Financing Policy and Strategy especially design and rollout of the National Health insurance Scheme. With my current experience and qualification as a Chartered Accountant, I am well positioned to assist with costing and prioritisation work in the development of benefits package. Equipped with expert knowledge and experience in public policy formulation and analysis geared towards health sector reform, I will be a key asset especially within the first 3 years during which the framework for the NHI is set. Without strong governance and policy frameworks, the NHI will not succeed, hence my knowledge in financial systems design from audit and accounting combined with public sector policy framework will allow me to progress to a position where I can influence developments in health financing.
In addition, the majority of the work in health financing reforms will be led from the government side, having worked intensely with governments and development agencies, I will be well positioned to take a leading role in future projects in health systems reform. Moreover, having grown up from poor background and worked in post conflict zones such as Liberia, I have first-hand knowledge and experiences of the challenges that poor and indigent communities face when accessing health services. This uniquely positions me towards growth and entrepreneurial and transformative impact in the health policy sector.
Within the long term, as Zimbabwe struggles and emerges from the economic challenges it faces, there is need for skilled and talented young minds (the future lies in the young generations) who are able to take up the mantle of development to ensure public service and efficiency reforms are at the centre of policies. I hope to be a leading expert within our generation towards advocating for inclusive policies that promote equity and equality in health service delivery and financing.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,797 
4780 Mar, you can actually lose the first paragraph if you want to. The essay should immediately open with a reference to "Upon my return..." in order to present the necessary and immediate information related to your career. The backgrounder can be merged into this paragraph in order to keep the key elements of the current introduction. It should end up creating a shorter and more effective introduction on your part.
It is important that you also reflect how you plan to use the knowledge that you will be gaining during your time of study once you return to your country. Which specific programs will your study gains be applicable to? What kind of changes do you see taking effect in the department that you handle because of it? Do you feel that you will have a better path towards a promotion because of your studies and the advancements that you will be implementing? How many years do you think it will take before all of your plans become a reality? Differentiate between your short term and long term career plans.
Overall though, the essay is informative and sticks to the prompt. What we need from you now, is to better develop certain aspects of the prompt. That way your post study career will be more believable and achievable in the long and short term.
