Unanswered [10] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Scholarship   % width Posts: 3


A career in Urban Redevelopment Authority (URA)


bilibolobala 1 / 4  
Mar 17, 2010   #1
Hi people,

I'm applying to this URA scholarship. Basically, the agency asked my why am I interested in this scholarship. Please criticize the essay as hard as you could. I really appreciate your kind help and will try to edit your essays as well.

---------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------
From building my future house with Lego structures to assembling origami models, from constructing pioneering towers during Scout meeting to constructing the physical world with abstract equations, I have always been enjoying building things. As I am looking for a scholarship that allows me to pursue my passion, many things attracted me to URA. However, as I was weighing up the career prospects that come after my undergraduate study, I realized that URA offers something different, innovative and less ordinary. Solving challenging problems of planning Singapore's urban landscape upon my return at URA would be an enriching exposure to the exciting world of urban planning, instead of many other desk-bound endeavors.

A career in URA would thus be a logical choice to be the first step in following my passion. My appointment at Conservation & Urban Design Group would give me insights into building Singapore a cosmopolitan without obliterating the nation's cultural heritage buildings while the works under Physical Planning Group would equip me with extensive knowledge on Singapore's Sustainable Development. Life on the happening environment at URA will teach me how to build up the integrity, take up the challenge, and make a meaningful contribution to the organization.

URA also impresses me with its supportive framework for employees' growth and development, both in areas of soft skills and technical knowledge. With URA's helps to develop others transferable skills such as organization, researching and communication, opens many ways to learn how to take on different professional responsibilities. Being a results-oriented person who enjoys a steep learning curve, I am excited to be stretched with assignments from various groups to develop a well-rounded perspective of Singapore's National Development. The working environment at URA is definitely challenging, but it is also a great place to work with a nice balance between work and play.

In addition, URA scholarship would provide a wide range of opportunities that makes a unique impact on the early stage of my career path. Being an URA scholarship recipient is a rewarding achievement that will not only raise my academic credentials but also act as a brilliant vehicle to meet like-minded scholars. The rigorous education at a prestigious university in England would broaden my horizons both as a scholar and as a person. In preparation for a long-term career with URA, the 8-week internship during my undergraduate study would definitely give me invaluable insights into the full spectrum of URA's dynamic culture at work. Most importantly, the scholarship would grant me the Singapore citizenship to live and contribute, in a tangible way, to the place that I have considered home since my secondary school time.

I am looking forward to receiving this prestigious scholarship that comes with a unique career path at URA. Granted, I would strive to make the most of my four years in university to explore the endless possibilities that would prepare me well for the working world. I believe that, by giving me an opportunity to be a part of an excellent team shaping the Singapore's urban landscape, URA has invested its shares into its human capital that plays an important role in transforming Singapore into one of Asia's premier global city.
studiousone - / 2  
Mar 17, 2010   #2
... I have always been enjoying enjoyed building things.
As I am looking for a scholarship that allows me to pursue my passion, many things attracted me to URA. Although many things attracted me ...

However, as I was weighing up the career prospects that come after my undergraduate study , I realized that URA offers something ...
EF_Susan - / 2,364 12  
Mar 18, 2010   #3
have always been enjoying building things.--- This is a little awkward. How about this:
have always enjoyed building things.

The first sentence of the essay is a lot for the reader to pay attention to all at once. If I had a long sentence like that in my intro, I would try to precede it with a short, quick sentence to capture the reader's attention.

opportunities that makes--- this seems awkward, but you were correct to write it this way:

URA scholarship would provide a wide range of opportunities that makes a unique impact on the early stage of my career path.

But even though it is correct, it sounds awkward. Try this:
URA scholarship would provide a wide range of opportunities that empower me at this early stage of my career path.

Nice job... great clarity and organization, great topic sentences...

Granted I would strive to make the most of my four years in university to explore the endless possibilities that would prepare me well for the working world. I believe that, By giving me an opportunity to be a part of an excellent team shaping the Singapore's urban landscape, URA will hav e invested its shares into the kind of human capital that plays an important role in transforming Singapore into one of Asia's premier global cities .


Home / Scholarship / A career in Urban Redevelopment Authority (URA)
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳