Hello, this is my essay for chevening application.
Any kind of inputs are very appreciated. Thank you!
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Outline why you have selected your chosen three university courses, and explain how this relates to your previous academic or professional experience and your plans for the future.
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I realized that my passion is in the architecture field, especially in the technological aspects. The technological aspects in architecture closely related to the development of the digital aided design, new materials, and new methods of the presentation to construction of building. These technology are rapidly growing at the moment because of many invention of tools to build, for example robots, 3D printer; and development of digital aided design.
In short, the courses that I preferred to are offering a better knowledge to design low environment impact building. However, there are key difference in the three courses in my opinion. UCL-Bartlett Architectural Design and Architectural Computation focuses more on the skills, while on the other hand University of Bath Architectural Engineering focuses more on knowledge. I personally prefer the UCL Architectural Design because they offer more versatile skills for the future development of building.
My first course of choice is the Architectural Design. Although it is a general subject of architecture, I have taken interest on what they offer in the subjects. They are divided into three labs, each focus on different field. Wonderlab focuses on material and fabrication technique advancement through the potential of digital/computer aided design; BiotA focuses on integrating bio-technology to architecture; Interactive Architecture Lab focuses on the potential of technology to interact with the environment and user. I am really interested in the three labs, especially in BiotA, because it brings new perspective to building design.
The second choice is also in Bartlett UCL, Architectural Computation. The course is a narrower view in the computation aspect. It offers more in depth scripting and software engineering than most of other courses. These skills are needed to develop advanced technique of digital design, fabrication, new tools to construct a building. They go as far as programming robots and drones to construct buildings. I have great interest in computation and the future potential is also great, since the industry is going more towards the technology nowadays to promote more accurate and safe building.
My third choice is Architectural Engineering in University of Bath. The course offers integrating sustainable construction engineering to the design process. The core modules generally gives in-depth knowledge of the methods to design and construct a low environment impact building. Although it is harder to find publication on student works, I believe that they offer much more comprehensive research based studies.
In Indonesia these fields are rather new to architects and most of the school slowly adapt to the recent developments. Especially the potential of digital design to fabrication, which is under-developed. I feel that I am lucky enough to have those skills introduced to me by one of my lecturer while I was in Bachelor Degree. I believe that technology could be the answer to reduce the acceleration of degrading environment, including reducing building contribution to climate change. However, no less importantly, I believe that these skills and knowledge of digital design is also a tool to make more interesting building.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Ignatius, in your rush to draft the essay, you forgot to mention the first university in the discussion about Bartlett - UCL. So I was surprised when you said that the same university offered your second course choice. Please work on developing a sentence that will introduce the university in the first choice paragraph. Just because you already mentioned it in the introduction doesn't mean that the reviewer will remember this information by default. He will be analyzing so much information from your essay that he will need that nudge to remind him about certain specific information.
Overall, the essay does cover the specifics of the essay. You have presented a very strong case for your desire to study in any of these universities, under any of the courses, within the United Kingdom. I don't see any need to change any of the content except for the clarification I mentioned above.
