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Can you comment on my essay about leadership to apply for Chevening *part of the essay*


cheven 1 / -  
Oct 13, 2016   #1
Chevening is looking for individuals that will be future leaders or influencers in their home countries. Explain how you meet this requirement, using clear examples of your own leadership and influencing skills to support your answer.

**introduction omitted**am facing problem i can not find a good introduction here any suggestions**

I started being a leader from a very young age, where I used to be the eldest sister and lead my younger sisters in every life aspects that we faced together, and through my life I learned much, with a lot of consequent trials, errors and humility; I have learned the difference between a leader and a manager, and that every leader could be a manager, but every manager can't be a leader.

When the company where I am working now was under construction, there was no manager in our department and the responsibilities of everything relating to the department was held by me, and I had to take the responsibilities of reviewing the needed systems in the company (computers, network systems and software systems) and start a projects to create and operate those systems and maintain their stability and productivity .

First I had to set by my self to organize the work, then I distributed the work with my colleague as a team and we did a perfect job in reasonable time. This work gives a good reputation in my company so they nominated me to work with a workers guild union team as volunteer to help employee to send their compliance to managers and to get their rights and give them supports if they need it.

I think lead the department , which is the one the core departments in the company and hold an important role, gives me the experience and the skills of leadership which need it to improve and stand up with companies to to be professional in their work as we know a leader knows the way and goes the way and shows the way.
TVLAERE 9 / 24 3  
Oct 13, 2016   #2
... and stand up with companies to to be professional in their work ...

What is the purpose of this essay? It is a bit short which can either be an advantage or a disadvantage, depending on the goal.

Maybe you should give a concrete example in the first paragraph to prove that you were being a leader from a very young age.


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