Essay about developing e-learning for maths word problems (Applying for KGSP)

Hello, I ask for help to revised my essay about Statement of purpose for KGSP. I re-read my writing many times and I know that there is something wrong and something is missing. I want to know which part need to be add or delete. I'm planning to take Educational Technology major.

designing and implementing an e-learning in primary schools

E-learning is currently an integral part of the school's educational reform efforts, from aquiring the essential e-learning infrastructure to the development of its human capital. E-learning is not only about its technology, but also about using technology in order to reinforce the face to face or classroom-based learning. E-learning in Indonesia began in mid-ninties but there have been no satisfactory results. But in 2017, there are quite a lot of educational startup that appears in Indonesia and it will apears more in the next year. Which is mean, educators and teachers in Indonesia requires intensive training and retooling to prepare themselves in their new role. Most of e-learning implementation project in developing contries, focus on higher level educations such as secondary level or university level, not in the primary level. So I would like to carry out a study in designing and implementing e-learning that suitable for primary level and I would like to focus on educational readiness in primary level for example design, implement and evaluate on educational program, especially in mathematics.

To achieve this, I would like to design an web based e-learning for mathematics. As it is for primary level, I would like to design a user friendly that suitable and easy access for students. In my experiences in teaching, at the first year they are really enjoy learning mathematics especially in equation, geomtery and picture graphs. But they are struggled to implement those topics on word problems. The reasons are are they not yet grasp the knowledge well and they can't implement what they learn in real life, especially in word problems. Therefore, I would like to developed an e-learning focusing on solving word problems using pictures, models and animation to enhance their understanding in mathematics word problems.

I would like to use a model from Chapnik (2000) to measure this e-learning readiness in primary level after designed it as it is important before implementing the system. The expected outcome of my study is designing and implementing an e-learning to enhance the quality of primary education especially in mathematics word problems and can be used further to formulate better strategy in implementing e-learning in primary level in other provinces or countries.

Hafsah, are you applying for an undergraduate scholarship or a masters degree scholarship? The reason I ask is because there is no statement of purpose requirement for masters degree students. A letter of self introduction is required based on specific prompt requirements instead. The SOP is required only for undergraduate applicants. Which one are you? For a statement of purpose, this essay is lacking in so many aspects.

First of all, the statement of purpose requires you identify a specific problem to address during your studies. The statement of purpose is used to describe the extent of your professional exposure to your chosen field and your theoretical or practical shortcomings / questions that led you to decide to enroll in advanced academic learning. This is meant to help you better perform your task as a professional. Normally, the SOP showcases your college education, your professional experience, and the considerations that led to your desire to study this particular course, which by the way, you have neglected to mention in the essay.

Now, I am confused as to why you presented a goal of study and study plan in the statement of purpose. For a KGSP masters degree scholarship application, that is written as a totally separate essay. It is not included in the letter of introduction or in this case, your statement of purpose. Somehow, I think you got confused when writing the self introduction essay and you accidentally called it a statement of purpose. This essay doesn't deliver the required information for a letter of self introduction but it also does not produce the proper information for a statement of purpose.

You need to double check your information sheet. Be sure about the essay you need to write and the prompt you are required to respond to. The KGSP is very specific about their prompt requirements and if you do not respond properly to the provided questions, you immediately lose your shot at the scholarship. You better make sure that you are writing the correct essay while you still have the time.

Thanks for your reply. yes I'm applying for master degree , Educational Technology major.

I double check the information sheet and the big title on Form 3 is indeed Statement of purpose, contains 2 things to write down. First is Goal of Study & Study Plan and the second one is Future Plan after Study. so this is I wrote for Goal of Study & Study Plan.

could you check again this writing for goal of study & Study plan?

Goal of study &
Study Plan
Goal of study, title or subject of research, and detailed study plan

I would like to design an web based e-learning for mathematics. As it is for primary level, I would like to design a user friendly that suitable and easy access for students. In my experiences as a teacher, the students are really enjoy learning mathematics especially in equation, geomtery and picture graphs. But they are struggled to implement those topics on word problems. The reasons are they are not yet grasp the knowledge well and they can't implement what they learn in real life, especially in word problems. Therefore, I would like to developed an e-learning focusing on solving word problems using pictures, models and animation to enhance their understanding in mathematics word problems.

I would like to use a model from Chapnik ...

Hafsah, your goal of study needs an appropriate title. It should also be presented in a thesis style proposal. The abstract should be clear, the methodology needs to be expanded to include the possible research assistance you may require of the university, and you need to present probable results for your goals. Right now, this essay sounds more like a research paper draft than an actual proposal. Your current presentation does not make it seem like you actually know what you are getting into with this research because you rely heavily on the information from your research instead of explaining how this research will benefit your career upon your return. The brief presentation that you made does not really create an impression because there is not enough development of your project proposal. Try to lessen the researched information and focus more on relating your goals with your professional requirements. The presentation should be similar to the college thesis proposal that you used in your senior year and contain information about where you plan to do the research, what your target demographic is, and how the university should be able to assist you in setting up your research work with other facilities.