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"Essence of economic and religious liberties in America" - Scholarship Prompt


eagledrafter 1 / -  
Apr 1, 2013   #1
Looking for editing help on a scholarship essay I am currently working on. The Scholarship is from a Libertarian foundation so my essay comes from a Liberalist standpoint. The essay is to be 500 words (I am currently at 487). The exact prompt is: "What is the essence of the economic and religious liberties that American's enjoy? Explain"

Any constructive criticism at all appreciated!

Americans' economic and religious freedoms stem from the United States support of citizen Individualism. It is because of Individualism that America has a mostly-free market economy. Because of America's individualistic tendencies, the United States subscribes to capitalism, an economic perspective that tends to provide individual economic liberties for it's citizens. American Individualism also allows for great religious freedom in the U.S.. The essence of economic and religious liberty in America is Individualism.

Individualism is a social theory favoring freedom of action for individuals over collective or state control. Liberty is the state of being free within society from oppressive restrictions imposed by authority. It is clear that Individualism and liberty are very much related. For American's to Liberty, Individualism must be present. Citizens cannot have liberty without the freedom to act without totalitarian state control. Because of America's beginnings in Individualism as seen in the Declaration of Independence "all men are created equal; endowed...with certain unalienable rights...life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness," American citizens are granted liberty, both economic and religious. Because the United States has tended toward Individualism, Americans have the ability to make choices independent of the government economically and religiously.

When Individualism collides with economics, the result is free market capitalism. Despite a recent growth in government involvement, the essence of America's free-market system is based in the Individualism. Without Individualism and the ability to make choices independent of the government, American's would not have the liberty and freedom of economics that exists currently. Austrian economist, F. A. Hayek, wrote in his work, The Constitution of Liberty, "A society that does not recognize that each individual has values of his own which he is entitled to follow can have no respect for the dignity of the individual and cannot really know freedom." As Hayek references, for America to respect the dignity and liberty of it's citizens in any arena, economic or otherwise, Individualism is paramount.

Individualism not only applies to economic freedoms but also to religious liberty. Because the American government allows for individualism in religion, the ability for individuals to practice a religion, or non-religion, is up to each citizen independently without government interference. Religious Individualism in America is guaranteed by the First Amendment to the U. S. Constitution, "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof..." American Individualism allows for individual liberty in picking and practicing religion.

In her book, Anthem, writer and philosopher Ayn Rand writes, "I am done with the monster of 'We,' this creed of corruption. What is my freedom, if all creatures, even the botched and impotent, are my masters? Instead...this one word: 'I.'" This is the backbone of Individualism. Instead of the government or "We" making decisions, "I" am able to make my own decisions, decisions of economics, religion, et cetera. Individualism is the core of American liberty, both economic and religious.
sulas - / 4 1  
Apr 3, 2013   #2
Great essay brother...
ningo 22 / 53 9  
Apr 3, 2013   #3
I love your conclusion; it is really persuasive! There are some mistakes in that essay from my view:

for it's citizens

for its citizens

"all men are created equal; endowed...with certain unalienable rights...life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness,"

It is better to write a complete sentence when you quote the declaration of independence, or just using necessary sentences. Don't use "..."

Good luck for your study!!! :D
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Apr 4, 2013   #4
Americans' economic and religious freedoms stem from the United States support of citizen Individualism.

... I wish you changed the presentation;
The economic and religious freedom of Americans stems from the the United States's supportive stand on citizen individualism.

It is because of Individualism that America has a mostly-free market economy.

It is because of this individualism that the USA has a more free market economy.

Because of America's individualistic tendencies, the United States subscribes to capitalism, an economic perspective that tends to provide individual economic liberties for it's citizens.

... this sounds confusing.... Better re-phrase

Individualism is a social theory favoring freedom of action forof i ndividuals overagainst the control bycollective group or the state control .


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