Master of Commerce AAS application
A) GIVE UP TO THREE PRACTICAL EXAMPLES OF HOW YOU INTEND TO USE THE KNOWLEDGE, SKILLS AND CONNECTIONS YOU WILL GAIN FROM YOUR SCHOLARSHIP. POSSIBLE TASKS CAN BE PERSONAL AND/OR PROFESSIONAL;
AND B) LIST ANY POSSIBLE CONSTRAINTS YOU THINK MAY PREVENT YOU FROM ACHIEVING THESE TASKS (2000 CHARACTER)
Firstly, this program will provide a great impact on increasing my expertise and skills in business development to craft sustainable business models. Something that I can implement to both the startup company that I will join upon returning to Indonesia and later my own business aggregator for Indonesian local products.
Secondly, the fact that this program will be attended by professionals from around the globe, I will be able to increase business cooperation on international level. On top of that their diverse background will help hone my understanding towards varieties of business streams, which will be a crucial skill to influence SSI owners into joining my business aggregator ventures.
Lastly, I will transfer my knowledge not only to small scale industry (SSI) owners but also to educational institution as early as elementary school. With the growing trend of entrepreneurship in Indonesia, laying a solid entrepreneurial skill and passion as early as possible is equally important to generating the numbers of new ventures in Indonesia. Because later when they grow up they will have not only embodied entrepreneurial values such as perseverance and self confidence, but the long term business mindset set at the back of their mind. Hence, we can increase the quality of venture created in the future.
However the biggest constrain is seeking for SSI to join the business aggregator venture and influencing them to changed the current short-term business practice into long term and sustainable business. In addition to that seeking for funding can also pose a challenge upon achieving my dream as this business model is not yet common in Indonesia.
I see you used a variety of vocabulary and some are correct, otherwise, some are improper. anyway, it is a good essay for me.
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Do not waste character count by counting out your discussion topics. Simply start the discussion. The 3-4 paragraph format will already tell the reviewer that you have 3 topics presented. However, the weakness of this response is that you are showing only 1 problem overall. You should also have obstacles to overcome with the first 2 presentations. Your response will be stronger if you can explain how your skills and network can help you overcome the obstacles that might come your way. You should have a clear problem presentation for the networking presentation, offering an explanation as to how you will overcome it using your network.
Actually, I think what you should do is present the problem as a topic sentence, then explain how the skills and knowledge you will acquire will directly relate to solving the problem. That way, you clearly indicate 3 problems and 3 examples of how you will be using your new theoretical and practical knowledge to solve the issues.