The Gift of Success/ Why the Incorporation should continue giving me the scholarship?

Please correct my wrong use of words or phrases, (proofread)
Why the Incorporation should continue giving me the scholarship?

The Gift of Success

The best definition of success that I read was from Alex Noble. He wrote that "Success is not a place at which one arrives, but rather the spirit with which one undertakes and continues the journey". Indeed, the greatest gift of success is the responsibility to endure my passion of achieving my goals in life. I came to prove that this statement is true as I was so bless to be an Iskolehiyo scholarship awardee last school year. God truly use this scholarship for me to see the clear path of being accountable enough in facing challenges in different aspects of my life as a student. I believe that being able to handle the responsibility behind my success of being a scholarship awardee in a right manner gives me the confident to say that our beloved Incorporation should still continue giving me the scholarship.

I believe that blessings in life are already provided to us by our God even though we didn't ask it yet. We just need to prove that we really deserve to achieve or be able to handle these blessings in the right way. That's the reason why after I received the scholarship award, I became certain that if I really deserve and want to maintain having this great blessing of being an Iskolehiyo scholar I needed to be persistent and determined to comply with the responsibilities behind it. This challenge to myself triggers me to meet the terms and conditions of being a scholar. I was able to grab the opportunity to render more than five hours of service in making a video presentation for the leadership forum with Cardinal Antonio Tagle held last February 17. For me this was the best video making project experience I have for there's no any price or amount of salary in my part time job can suffice what I felt when I saw the smiles of my co-awardees while they are watching the video I did. Indeed, the pressure I had in making this video project allows me to have the pleasure of sharing my God given talent to my co-awardees especially to those who really become an inspiration for me like the professionals.

It is part of our responsibility as a scholar to maintain good grades. Iskolehiyo scholarship award really fuels me to go beyond my limit in maintaining good grades. I was blessed to be able to boost my academic performance this last school year compared to the performance I had when I am not yet a part of the scholarship. I had also the opportunity to continue and take some advance subjects of my specialization course in Physics this summer using the financial support that the scholarship granted to me.Being blessed to be an Iskolehiyo scholar lessens my focus in attaining enough salary in my part time job as video editor in a freelance studio and as a Math tutor. In effect, I was able to focus of attaining my goal to be one of the best future teachers of Math and Physics. This scholarship really contributes for me not just to be excellent in my academic performance but also to be active in participating different extracurricular activities. I am an active member of a group of Math majors called PNU Math Circle. This is not just a group of competitors in different contest in math but also a group that endeavors service through tutorial to those students who struggle in different math subjects. I was also blessed last semester to be elected as the new Business Manager of the PNU Math club and be able to render service this coming school year. Through these opportunities I was able to enhance my leadership skills that our scholarship donor would like to inculcate to different generations- service, integrity and excellence.

Iskolehiyo scholarship award gives me the momentum in increasing my holistic performance as a student and also as a responsible oldest child of my parents. This award was able to lessen the cargo of our parents in sending me and my two younger sisters to school. The scholarship allows my parents to concentrate in our basic need expenses and in sending my two younger sisters in school. Truly, God allows me to maximize this award for me to be a responsible individual and be able to fight for the right to access education. This scholarship makes me feel that I am not alone in the way of achieving my goals. I know that God will continually use this opportunity to lighten up my path of achieving my educational career and goals in life.

I began to believe in this statement when I was so blessed to have been awarded with an Iskolehiyo scholarship in my last year of school.


... I find there are many repetitions, both ideas and words. I'd suggest you to re-phrase this line again.