Hey there, I am new here and I really need your help. I am applying for master degree scholarship and It is the first time for me to write this kind of letters. though I did some digging on the internet. but I believe your help in modifying my first draft will make a difference..
It is with a great enthusiasm I apply for The Erasmus-Mundus Marhaba Scholarship to study a Master in Finance at Minho-University, or MA in International Business Administration and Modern Languages at University of Almeria starts on autumn 2016. My ultimate goal is to become a professor at a leading research university in Yemen, as well as a professional expert in the business world. Therefore, I believe this scholarship provides me with the opportunity to bring my goal closer.
In college, Having enjoyed the broad nature of Bachelor in Administrative Science with emphasis on accounting, I established myself among the top students in the faculty and graduate in June, 2015 with distinction, first in class of 457 students. In the pursuit of knowledge and excellence, I have always adopted a rigorous approach in order to attain in-depth understanding of the subject in hand. This has amply reflected in my consistent academic career, always coming in top students in my class and having own merit in tenure of teaching assistant in my university. As highly diligent and driven student in the field of business, I have gained a profound knowledge in accounting and financial arenas as well as the business world in general, and acquired a range of important transferable skills of data analysis, presenting arguments, analytical thinking and making decisions. Which I believe make me perfect fit for the master in finance or international business administration.
To make the most of my time at university, I was an active member in campus and pushed others to be active too. In junior year, becoming a class representative and then the chairperson of the graduation committee, has given me the opportunity to go beyond the academia and delve deeper into all the university life has to offer. Through my participation in organizing events, interacting and communicating with others, designing programs and making speech, I has greatly enhanced my leadership skills and developed a better sense of communication with professors, students and faculty members. But the most meaningful outcome of my involvement has been the discovery of my passion to help others. After graduation, I wanted to take my college experiences and use them as a vessel to make a difference, by volunteering in a refugee camp with the Organization of Red Crescent. Taking full advantage of my network and relationships in university, I gathered a team of fifteen, most of them were my friends in college. Our main objective was to raise money, we also set up a new initiative to gather second-hand house necessities. Together in two and half months, we raised more than one million Y.R ,five thousands dollars, and thousands pieces of used clothes, shoes, blankets and etc. I had an incredible and unforgettable feelings, when I glanced at the smile face of a little girl after she got a doll. Through it all, I realized that I simply loved working with people in some way shape or form allow me to change at least one individual life for the better. By being a shoulder for the fallen ones, a hand for someone reaching out, or to be there when others are in need.
Ten Years from now, I envision myself as a professor in a leading university, Yemen. Striving to be an excellent resource to assist students and the learning community by enhancing their understanding of financial and accounting matters, and through clear writings and informative lectures. Currently, I have already experienced the excitement and stratification feelings by getting a full time job as a teaching assistant at Ibb University. I have just put myself in the right path which gives me that sense of right direction. Besides my academic career path, I want to have my own business consulting firm. With regard to my short-term goal is right at the corner, which is to successfully get into your preeminent Erasmus Mundus Scholarship Program. At the end of my master degree, I am not only planning to commence a front office career in large company or bank, but also to continue on my studies in the financial and accounting areas by continuously researching and writing papers related to the field, and then through my PhD studies when time comes.
After thoroughly studying the different master degrees Marhaba Program has to offer, I have come to believe that a master in finance provides me with the most reliable avenue to achieve my goals. This program, along with research thesisŲ« focusing on Corporate Finance ,Financial Market and Investment, Financial Analysis, with up-to-date developments and all trends and changes in financial industry will definitely enhance my scope of research and equip me with a comprehensive understanding of the financial field, providing me with the ability to enter a professional role in the industry, and academia. Benefiting from the ability to choose two elective courses, I intent to take Advanced Accounting and Accounting for Human Capital and Environment. Furthermore, this master program lies the foundations to PhD studies in accounting and finance. That is why I take the master in finance as my first option.
The master in international business and language studies seems sparkling to me. The provision to courses in international management and strategic planning, I will explore the international business environment, the developing patterns of the world trade markets, and gain profound knowledge in-how international transactions and operations fulfilled. By taking this master, I will develop managerial and analytical skills, have the confidence and knowledge to set, develop and implement plans for international business operations. In addition, undertaking external internship coupled with research project, will enables me to gain a hands-on experience on applying the knowledge and theory I have learned, to deal with real-world situations. Furthermore with proficiency in English and good command of a modern language( French or German), it adds great advantage to my overall experience. What I believe is that this master degree would be an excellent way to prepares me for a career with management potential at any field in the business world, to opens a new doors for me that I might never dreamed of, and to broaden my horizons.
I wish to get the chance through Erasmus-Mundus Master Scholarship to interact with students from diverse professionals and cultural backgrounds drawn from all over the world, to hone cross-cultural skills and to see the world in different light. Moreover, this master program represents an essential stage in my education, and certainly, offers me the opportunity to achieve my future endeavors. Ultimately, I will regularly make a significant contribution of my knowledge, ideas and experience within lectures, group discussions and social activities. Given my history of commitment to excellence, and my passion to be in a constant circle of development. I consider myself eligible for your highly esteemed program and looking forward to receive your acceptance letter in May. Thank you for your consideration and time.
Noman, first things firt, the presentation of your essay needs to be fixed.
Merge the small paragraphs and make at least a minimum of 4 or three if you can,
segmented paragraphs in your essay will not help in bringing up or giving a strong image of your essay.
Now, the word choice you have can still be enhanced, your words are somehow weak and does not really
convey a strong personality, when you work on your words, check the structure of your sentences as well,
make sure that you have a smooth flow of ideas and logical order of the progress of the essay.
Next, focus on the final paragraph of your essay and I suggest to do the following modification.
- As I understand, thisI believe the program is very competitive,
- attracting highly motivated students, but I am convinced that my goodand with my record at the
- University,and determination to succeed givewill provide me a strong recommendation
- for a place at it.in the institution.
- Therefore, I would be honored if you decide to accept my candidateship forto be a part of the Master studies program .
- In the same time I am aware of possible challenges and high investments of effort I will have to place in order to successfully complete this courses.( this sentence is not necessary )
There you have it Noman, I hope my remarks helped.
