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Great motivational principle from my father. Global Undergraduate Exchange Program 2017

khaledmohamed 1 / -  
Dec 31, 2016   #1

There is no substitute for hard work. - Thomas Edison

A quote by Edison and an advice my father instilled in me since I was a child. It was great motivational principle; not to waste a chance for being a better person and working hard to achieve my dream and join the faculty of medicine. Since the first days at university, I quickly realized that not everything could be learned in lectures hall or class rooms. I had to gain experience enhancing my communication and leadership skills, knowledge and capabilities. I began to search for every chance to learn in and out of university. I was constantly searching for opportunities to volunteer and explore different cultures.

I participated in volunteer activities both inside and outside university till I became the leader of Zewail City Friends in my governorate. As a team we worked to promote the importance and value of scientific research. This year I was chosen to present the Opening Statement at Zewail City Friends annual conference in the attendance of the great surgeon Dr. Magdy Yakoup. I also volunteered in Scicope Festival - the largest scientific festival for children in Egypt- which aims to educate and simplify sciences for children.

I was selected to represent Tanta University at the Arabian youth union about the Nile River and Nile basin countries held in Egypt 2015.

In my free time, Time management is my secret having some small business besides study and working with my father at our farm, learning new languages so I can learn how to depend on myself.

I always in continuous searching for opportunities for education in different communities and get in touch with different cultures, don't stand at what I learn in my country, hence this a grant to be an opportunity to know the outside world and definitely it would be a pride to participate as ambassadors for my country and the deployment of Egyptian culture everywhere.

Since English shapes a high percentage of our daily life nowadays and my language of study. So, I wish UGRAD would be a great chance to improve my language that will help me being a good researcher, too.

I love photography and visiting new places in Egypt. I also have a fervent desire to visit many places abroad, even get my talents heavier and working on developing them, especially in an open, global society like America, which undoubtedly will impact positively on my personal and professional goals.

Being a good cooker would be a great experience to share the great traditional Egyptian foods with my friends from all over the world.
Perhaps the extensive experience gained from dealing with my friends at the university from other nationalities, such as Palestinians, Syrians, Malaysians, I always help them and welcome them in Egypt as their second home, so it was a good motivation to make new friends when I will be thrown into the company of students from various parts of the world, our group could form a nucleus that is expected to get along and cooperate with one another while building lifelong friendships and networks that can help me with my future careers.

Because of that I study the USMLY and intend to apply for exams later, Travelling to America now would be a good step to learn more about American society.

Consequently, UGRAD will not only help me in the academic side, but will develop my skills and my hobbies and enhancing the ability to discover myself and learn new educational methods to apply in our community.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,311 3348  
Jan 1, 2017   #2
You have presented excellent starting points for discussions regarding your ability to become a great participant in the program. However, you have not properly developed the salient points of your essay. Overwhelming the reviewer with under developed information about your talents and skills is not really going to show him why you make a considerable candidate for the program. You should cut down your presentation to your top 3 most notable skills or accomplishments which should help to make you stand out as an ideal candidate. At the moment, you have all of your abilities listed but none of them really stand out because your discussions lack development in terms of showing the usability of these skills once you get to the United States. Some of your paragraphs are mere statements that have not been developed into properly informative paragraphs. A long essay is not as good as a short and informative essay. In your case, you should opt for short but informative.

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