HRM impact - reasons have encouraged me to apply the Global Korea Scholarship Program

Hi I hope you take time to read my essay and will be happy to hear your feedback for me :)

kgsp application essay

As my parents always say to me "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world- Nelson Mandela". My family is my biggest motivation in pursuing the higher education. I'm from the middle economic family who always prioritizes education first. My parents worked very hard to support me. I understand how difficult my parents worked and I promised myself that I must enter a university to meet their expectations. Soon I reached my academic goals and got accepted into ______ University with a major Industrial Engineering.

For me, continuing to study abroad with your own cost is a common thing. But, studying abroad with the full scholarship because of your achievements is an extraordinary achievement. Because of the funding reason, I search for scholarship program to get masters degree. In the past i have tried to apply Student Exchange scholarship program for spring 2019. I accepted in Exchange Program in ______ University for one year with partial scholarship. Because of this condition, I couldn't attend the program because i cannot fund myself by myself. During my education, I have principle for trying to reduce the burden education cost from my parents. These reasons have encouraged me to apply the Global Korea Scholarship Program.

I was always curious and wondered "How does human resource management impact the overall success of an organization?" This question became the beginning where I decided to take the Human Resource Management (HRM) major for master degree. In undergraduated program I studied some courses which are related to that goal. Some of them are Basic of HRM such as Industrial Psychology, industrial Company Organization, Introduction to Economics, Product Design and Development. During my College experience, I became a lecturer assistant helping my lecturer to plan learning activities, research, and complete records also getting the classroom ready for lesson. I also actively participated in the college organization called Student Executive Board in Community Engagement Department. I had a great experience in social activities and this eventually led me to create a social organization name ''Community Dedication''. It was incredible to be able to help others through social programs I had, such as charity, caring for the enviroment, and teaching suburban children. Beside joining a main organization, I handle some events such as National Seminar and social activies. This lead me to the idea that human resource management would be a perfect course major for myself.

furthermore, I got the real experiences work when I did my internship program. I have completed my internship in Nike shoes Factory. learn a lot about graphic representation that gives an overall view of product management process and organizational process. After graduating from my undergraduate, I was accepted in business administration's department as an assistant finance manager where I'm working now. Since I started working I've always deal with different people in the business from various guests to diverse company employees. All of this increased my passion for this area and drove me to look for an opportunity to study HRM in more specialized academic way.

Additionaly im being delegate conference of International global network and got United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) topic, this gave me confidence to gained my communication skills and knowledge about humanitarian action. To understand more about Human Resources Management i also actively participated course in international business management institute berlin- german. I took HRM courses. However, when the time passes, I feel that my knowledge and abilities are still deficien. I decided to persue my master's degree. I believe that having Master's degree in Business Administration major in human resource managament will make me more equipped and capable under this field.

I have always wanted to study in Korea because i wanted to pursue higher education. I believe that Korea as developed country has a high quality education. Studying abroad will allow me to utilize my competencies and will be able to share it to others. Also will help and inspire people with the knowledge and experiences i have. I always wanted to explore Korea's culture and to have a better understanding of their tradition. Being in this scholarship program will let me experience, learn and understand its culture and will make the graduate school enjoyable.

If your parents are the ones saying this, then there should not be a reference to Nelson Mandela. This makes your statement appear to be a lie. Why? Your parents did not say it, Nelson Mandela did. One point against you for not being honest in your declarations at the very start of your essay. Remember that you are signing an oath with this application attesting to the truthful information within your essays that you will be submitting throughout the application process.

Your family cannot be your biggest motivation for applying to the course and scholarship. You get nothing by being motivated by them. They can be an inspiration, but definitely not a motivation. The motivation needs to be related to a personal career decision and its relevant background. Wishing to study abroad on funding cheapens your motivation to apply for the GKS-U scholarship. That means you are applying for multiple scholarships and will accept the first offer you get. You are really off to a disqualifying start with this presentation. From the first to second paragraph, you have successfully disqualified yourself from the competition already.

Here is my advice, review the prompt requirements again. Pay specific attention to the Korean relationship, the motivation to study in Korea, and other Korea specific requirements. You do not have an effective essay at this point. I cannot even continue to read it because of the inappropriateness of your statement. If I cannot continue reading it, the actual reviewer most certainly won't finish reading it either.