KGSP Self-Introduction - Striving for a global education in business

Hi this is my self-introduction for the Graduate KGSP. I would greatly appreciate any advice and comments to help me improve. Thank you!

my love for learning new languages

Letter of Self-Introduction

A global education was always important to me both in academics and in my personal development. For example, I was selected to participate in the Ministry of Education Japanese Language Exchange Programme. Understanding the elements of culture was how I learnt to build bridges with people. Thus, one way I challenge myself to strive for international learning is through my love for learning new languages. Apart from being a native speaker in English and Mandarin, I have a JLPT N2 in Japanese and am proficient in French. I took part in numerous Korean cultural events in university such as a seminar on the treasured Korean oral heritage, pansori. I then enrolled in Korean language classes which I am currently still attending. I have built a solid foundation in studying languages from years of passion and experience. As such, I am excited about the valuable opportunity offered by the KGSP to immerse myself in Korean language and culture in my studies and in everyday life.

In the academic area, I chose to study law as it provides rigorous training in critical thinking. I enjoy using knowledge to analyse and solve real-life problems. I had chosen a school with an international focus on law, particularly on Asia which was my interest. In my first-class International Commercial Arbitration dissertation, I researched on the conflict of interests of arbitrators in different jurisdictions from a comparative perspective. Through my research, I could also explore in depth the socio-economic factors behind legal theory influencing these laws. For example, the development of and attitude towards arbitration in Korea. I was interested in studying the measures Korea took with the goal of establishing itself as an important seat of arbitration in Asia. As outbound economic activity increases and the Korean market continues to open to global players, numerous opportunities will arise which are unique to an economy in the process of maturing. Learning more about socioeconomic affairs of Korea spurred on my desire for an international career specialising in Asia with a base in Korea. I am pursuing a business and commerce focused graduate programme precisely because it will allow me to analyse global social, political and economic issues and their impact on the business and trade and subsequently their interaction with the legal market.

I have interned at top law firms in ********* which had honed my legal and commercial knowledge in practice. My work included executing due diligence processes for high-profile, fast-paced M&A transactions. I have also strategized and drafted submissions for complex international arbitration which required not only legal knowledge but detailed research into the business dealings of the parties. These work experiences made me aware of how important it was for lawyers to be business savvy which spurred to pursue graduate study on business and commerce. I maintained a dedication towards refining my commercial knowledge in university. I was appointed team leader for several business competitions. In the ABC Business Challenge, we had to advise on a M&A deal. I not only had to handle the pressure from a tight time-frame, I often had to manage conflicting opinions within my team. My team eventually emerged third place in London. Additionally, I was selected to take part in the XYZ Live Conference where we discussed the future of the global legal industry. One issue was the expansion of international firms into Korea, an area of pivotal growth. During the conference, I had an opportunity to lead a team in a negotiating exercise for a Sales and Purchase Agreement in which we were the only to the successfully conclude a deal. I later participated in the 2016 Korea Future Forum led by eminent speakers such as Dr Bark Tae Ho, former Minister for Trade of Korea. The panel discussed topics of politics and economics such as the impact of trade liberalisation especially on Free Trade Agreements. I became interested in how Korea would continue to support innovation to continue developing its technology sector which was crucial to its success.

Interning at an Intellectual Property (IP) law firm boosted my knowledge of the technology sector and grew my interest in the industry. I had the opportunity to work with Korean lawyers in the firm handling Korean clients which gave me insight on the technology industry in Korea. I gained a comprehensive understanding of how businesses approach IP. During my internship, I handled non-contentious work such as patent prosecution and producing and presenting research on key issues such as on the transfer of trademarks. It was clear to me that IP, in conjunction with the technology industry was a growing and dynamic industry which I was excited about working in. Korea is a front-runner in technology and innovation and a leading nation patents produced every year. Korea's innovation-driven economy is ideal for studying how the technology is developed and supported by a legal and business perspective. Its position as a pivotal point of growth in East Asia offers the unique opportunity to study the industry in the region. Therefore, pursuing my graduate study in Korea is crucial for my future goals as a specialist in technology and East Asia. KGSP is not only an opportunity to be proficient in a language and culture that I am passionate about and will be pertinent to my future career, it is also a chance for me to develop professionally in a most suitable environment.

@jkl
I think your academic and technical part is good but you lack course of life which you should give them some of your family background.

Also, you may create first impression to reviewer which will help them to remember you :)

Jessalyn, the KGSP reviewers do not review your qualifications based upon general comments such as these. Review the prompt requirements and deliver the necessary elements of the application based upon those guidelines. That means, you cannot present such a disconnected essay discussion. Start from the first element required, working your way to the last in the presentation line up. Deliver at least a summary of the family background that you came from along with an explanation of how the family and community you came from helped you to develop a specific point of view about life. Right now, there is no reference to that part of the prompt at all.

Be detailed about your college background. That means you have to name the university, your course, the major you studied, plus any achievements that you may have gained during this time. You have a very extensive professional background but it is useless because the information provided comes across as unreliable. There are no references to the names of the firms you worked with, the length of time you were with them, your job title and responsibilities. All of which the reviewer requires as part of the fact checking of your application documents and qualifications. Revise those parts of the essay to be more accurate and informative in order to be considered factual parts of your application.

As for the languages portion, if you do not have a TOPIK qualifying certificate to present to the reviewer, it will be best if you do not discuss that part at all. Since you are not fluent in Hangul, there is no point in trying to impress the reviewer with your abilities in French and other languages which do not apply to the KGSP requirements. The only impressive language you can speak of will be an intermediate or advanced TOPIK qualification certificate.

In all honesty, there is no clear motivation for your desire to study in Korea. The reasons as just as blurred in your essay. Try to be more prompt consistent in your presentation in order to create a more acceptable and informative self introduction letter.