hi, this is my first draft. please give your suggestions and correction.
Erasmus Image processing and Computer Vision motivational letter
Dear Sir /Madam,
First, I would like to express my appreciation for this opportunity to apply for the Master of Science in EMJMD IMAGE PROCESSING AND COMPUTER VISION, Erasmus Mundus Scholarship Program. I graduated from xyz University, India with a Bachelor of Technology degree in Information Technology with CGPA 8.32 out of 10 at 2018 and for the past two years I have been working as a server-side developer in ABC, ZZZ.
With an Undergraduate Degree in Information Technology, I studied some exciting subjects like Image and Video Coding, Information coding Techniques, Artificial Intelligence, Data Mining. So I think along with my interest, my undergraduate syllabus also aligns well with the prerequisite of EMJMD IMAGE PROCESSING AND COMPUTER VISION, Erasmus Mundus Scholarship Program. Since my Work experience helps me to understand the Industrial needs well, I can act as a bridge between theoretical learning and industrial needs.
In my college, I did two projects. The pre-final year project was A SAS billing Application with an Android App. It is designed to help the customers of a supermarket to bill their item with their phone by using the Barcode Scanner in the android app which allows the customer to scan the barcode and add the product to their list for billing. This helps customers to save their time at the billing counter. The Final year Project was at ABC. The project was about predicting the deals in the ABC product. I did this project under two project guide one from college Dr.V.geetha and one from ABC. The project is to build a predictive model that uses the customer's data to predict the success probability of their Deal. We used Gradient ensembling, by creating a base score for a Deal with the organization data and ensemble it with the score from their communication for the Deal we get an overall score out of 100 that shows the success probability of the Deal.
Apart from the main projects I did several small projects out of interest like solving the 8-puzzle problem using hill-climbing Algorithm, Creating a Digital Clock using 8085 microprocessors and I have also worked on a few Kaggle competitions like Open Images 2019 - Object Detection, Free Sound Audio Tagging 2019, APTOS 2019 Blindness Detection.
Since I am from the lower-middle-class family, I couldn't afford to continue studies after my Bachelors, but I always wanted to go abroad to explore the world, people and to study in a good university. The reason that I decided to narrow down my career to Image Processing and Computer Vision is that mainly due to my internship at ABC. Since I worked at Machine Learning, and I love to continue that, I started doing a lot of Kaggle competitions in my free time. Once I came across a competition APTOS 2019 Blindness Detection, that helps the doctors find the Diabetic Retinopathy to stop blindness in the early stage. Though the competition was not so hard, it has the potential to help millions to save their vision, especially in a country like India, where most of us suffer from Diabetics. Since I am living with optic neuropathy for the past 12 years, I know how much it means to the common people. After spending some time researching the potential for Image Processing and Computer Vision, I realized the subject is far more exciting and fascinating than I thought. With proper knowledge and practice, I think I can make a successful career in this field and help a lot of people.
This master course will help me to apply IPCV techniques in the wide spectrum of fields, especially in the fields of medicine and cosmology. As I mentioned earlier, I feel Computer Vision plays a significant role in the medical field. It can reduce the cost and fast track the treatment. As for Cosmology is considered, it is one of few fields that fascinate me, with the help of my knowledge from IPCV I can help space agencies to explore the space and Moreover, This course also gives me a chance to explore different culture and peoples in Europe.
Given my Bachelor program's relevancy, my interest towards the IPCV, my work experience, and my fast learning nature I consider myself to be a right candidate for EMJMD IMAGE PROCESSING AND COMPUTER VISION, Erasmus Mundus Scholarship Programme and I hope this program and the scholarship will help to achieve my professional goal thereby I can give something back to the society.
Hoping for a positive response.
With Regards,
XXX.@PRABU
Hi. Welcome to the forum. It's always good to see new people come by here. I hope you find this feedback to be helpful.
I find that the first paragraph is quite decent already as it is. Because of this, I would not recommend making any further revision that couple trample the delivery of the context. Rather, I do recommend that you attempt to relay the last sentence in a clearer manner. Try to provide a separate sentence for your reiteration of your current career pattern in order to help readers better fathom the text provided.
Furthermore, I also recommend being more cautious of following fundamental writing rules as you proceed. Throughout your writing, you had minute mistakes concerning grammatical composition. Just be more cautious as you proceed.
@Maria
Can I change the first paragraph to something like this,
First, I would like to express my appreciation for this opportunity to apply for the Master of Science in EMJMD IMAGE PROCESSING AND COMPUTER VISION, Erasmus Mundus Scholarship Program. Currently, I am working as a server-side developer in XYZ, ZZZ. I have completed my Bachelor of Technology in Information Technology at ABC college in 2018 with CGPA 8.32 out of 10.
