Personal statement for Kgsp.
Tell me if you notice anything that should be modified
In recent years, Mechatronics has changed our lives and today the results can be seen everywhere. Mechatronics are all around us, from computer hard drives and robotic assembly systems to washing machines, coffee makers, and medical devices. Electronics that control mechanical systems account for much of the value of the average automobile, managing everything from stability control and antilock brakes to climate control and memory-adjust seats. My curiosity grew little by little about how everything works technically, how a machine can do everything by itself and why everything is easier now. That's the reason I chose to major in mechatronics.
South Korea has proven its Excellency in technology and mechanical fields- being the world's number one producer of semiconductors and ships, and exporting vast amounts of machinery and automobiles.It has been ranked as the 2nd most innovative country in the world in 2013 by Businessweek. Morocco is working hard as well and making lots of effort in order to developits advanced technologies and industrial sectors.Lately the two countries have strengthened bilateral cooperation in several areas, notably the sectors of automotive industry, new technologies, electronics, renewable energy, education and training. So I want to also be a part of it too.
During my studies, I had many opportunities to work in a team on several basic projects such as an automatic drill and an obstacle detection robot. I got practical knowledge, thus being ready to do an end of courses project all alone. I was an intern in a concrete plant where I took the control of all the central and made 22 m3 of concrete using the programmable controller. Not as usual, I was given the responsibility of finding the problematic by myself and solving it. I liked the methodology, because I believe that a mechatronical should find and understand the problem before thinking about its solution, not only to make things go faster, but also to make them smarter.
Outside of university, I also have a keen interest in languages, and believe that as long as humans exist they should aim to speak and learn as many languages as possible.Growing up as a child, I spent my whole life learning Standard Arabic, French, and some English (though this was not my main focus).However, when I first entered university and started to consider my future, I realized that to be international is to know English well. As a result of this, I started working hard on improving my English skills.At the same time, I found myself wanting to learn Korean too, and thus decided to study it in my free time as a hobby. Since then, around a year has passed and I'm beginning to feel comfortable with basic Korean.
In order to integrate my hobby and professional knowledge into an eventual career, I have decided to apply for the Korean Government Scholarship Program (KGSP). I hope this will allow me to gain more knowledge related to my major, experience new and interesting things, and also gain experience related to Mechatronics and the Korean language.in order to develop its advanced
the automotive industry
exist, they
... of finding the problem by myself
... to do an end of course project all alone
You did an okay job with your use of phrases, but you may want to improve on your worst ones: lots, got, hard, most, many, because, make, things, go, me
The beginnings of your sentences are lacking in complexity.
Cannot be sure if the information about mechatronics is all true, but I like your style. You can improve your usage of phrases by reading essays from homework-lab.com/examples/, the more texts you'll be reading, the more knowledge of proper stylistic choises you will gain. Good luck to you.
I will contribute to help revise your grammar,
My curiosity grew little by little about .... (My curiosity is getting bigger ....)
So I want to also be a part of it too. ... ( I want to take part in ...)
I found myself wanting to learn Korean to ... (I found that I wanted to learn,..) you can not mix between find and gerund
