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Letter of Motivation - ErasmusMundus Scholarship - MS in BDMA


hunybutt 1 / 1 1  
Oct 17, 2016   #1
your feedback will really be appreciated.

This cannot be refuted that parents usually preplan their kid's future even before their birth, especially in a society like Pakistan, and I was no different than others for my parents had decided field of medicine when I was in school. I had no personal preferences in high school regarding my future field of study until I was fascinated by a world of technology, which established my keen interest in computer and its applications. Despite all odds I managed to convince my parents and got admission in undergraduate program of Computer Engineering in well accredited and top ranked university of my time.

My undergraduate journey was full of endeavors and exploration of various aspects of computer science; data structures, algorithms, database systems, artificial intelligence, operating system, embedded systems and software engineering. I got the opportunity to practically implement theoretical knowledge in term projects. My first term project HRMS (Human Resource Management) was a web application that involved implementing OOP concepts, database communication and incorporating CRUD operations using SOA. The project allowed me to experience through the phases of software engineering from Requirement gathering, Analysis, development to testing of a project. I also worked closely on database modeling and system modeling via UML. My final year project Automatic Baby Carrier was combination of hardware and software, which secured second prize on All Science Fair competition at national level. I enjoyed every facet of university life from the curricular to events. I actively participated in technical events held at university and had been a member of computer programming societies of university.

My urge to employ theoretical and experimental knowledge earned during undergraduate program led me to join a software house. This helped me to sharpen my programming, analytical and problem-solving skills developed throughout my undergraduate journey. Moreover, my professional experience helped me to contrast the academic world and to understand why it is important to engage in a professional pursuit for it is a deep well of dynamic experiences and you get to know what are the problems pertaining and how to solve those problem with the help of technology. I was fortunate to work in a variety of domains including Enterprise Application Integration, Business Intelligence and Web applications etc. Communication skills, personality grooming and self-confidence flourished by working in this profession. With the passage of time, a strong desire to do research work engendered in me and I decided to pursue higher studies to further enhance my knowledge.

I am applying at the Erasmus Mundus Joint Master Degree Program in Big Data Management and Analytics (BDMA). The work I liked the most during my professional career was developing a system to measure the performance of a business i.e. BI. Developing ETLs and resilient system on the basis of metrics on which any business works, business process modeling and using reporting tools to create visual reports. Managing and working on enormous amount of data of finance and banking intrigued the excitement to explore the big data domain. Hence, I was tempted to dig into the big data domain and started looking for opportunities in BI. I strongly believe myself as a suitable candidate for this scholarship and it would be an honor for me to join this prestigious program as it offers academic and professional opportunities, which I am eagerly looking for. This program will allow me to face new challenges, collaborating with people from different backgrounds and competing with them. In addition it will help me to strengthen in research field through innovative research ideas. In the end, it will not only aid me to achieve my goal but will also make me a better person in the field of Big data theoretically and professionally.

Thanks in advance
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4773  
Oct 19, 2016   #2
Hi Saleha. I believe that the first part that you wrote in the essay does not relate at all to your personal motivation for wanting to undergo MS studies. It sounds like information that is best presented in a personal statement or background essay, not a motivation letter. Your essay should be busy presenting your college achievements or professional experience that create the foundation for the belief that your career path in the future will benefit from your MS studies in BDMA. I think the essay should start by saying instead that you graduated with a degree in Computer Engineering as that immediately informs the reader that your chosen career is something you have planned from the start and is not an unrelated career switch for you.

In terms of your experience, always mention the company you worked for. Don't be so vague as to simply say that you worked at a software house. The name of the company also adds credence to your claim regarding your motivation for higher studies in the field. Also, you don't have to inform the reader that you are applying for the scholarship. That is a given since you are writing these essays as part of the application. You would not be writing this essay if you weren't applying. Stating the obvious doesn't move your essay forward.

Basically, you need to just edit the essay for length and content. I believe that the advice I have given you can start you off on the right track towards that.
OP hunybutt 1 / 1 1  
Oct 19, 2016   #3
Thank you so much for the advice. i will work on it


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