NTU Scholarship essay - event that have personal importance. The National Service

Below is my topic and I am currently trying to apply scholarship. I have a 300 word limit and would need help with structure, grammar and vocabulary check. Tips on how to improve would be great too thank you !!

How National Service has changed me for the better.

National Service (NS) is mandatory for every Singaporean son. Those who served the NS would definitely know how Basic Military Training (BMT) has changed them. Going through BMT, I have enhanced my values and skills which changed me for the better.

On my first day of enlistment, I thought everything would be easy. But, I was wrong. When I first entered my bunk, it was a whole new environment with many unfamiliar faces. I was afraid and confused. I was not able to get used to regimentation at first. However, after I knew that I had no choice but to adapt. By constantly reminding myself that regimentation is necessary and beneficial for myself, I started to like regimentation and I implemented it to my daily life.

Being appointed as a platoon-in-charge(PIC) has allowed me to learn to lead people that I am not comfortable with. My job scope as PIC includes disseminating instructions given out by superiors, ensuring that everyone is accounted for and making sure standards and rules are adhered to. With this opportunity, I was given a chance to hone my leadership skills.

After being confined in camp, I came to understand that being able to spend time with my family is a privilege. It made me more appreciative towards my family and not taking them for granted. Even eating a meal with them would make me happy, because staying in camp would mean I have less time with them

Going through field camp really makes me understand that having to shower and having fans at home is a luxury that we should not take for granted.

All these experiences have changed me into a more regimented, adaptable and appreciative person. If given a chance to go through BMT again I would gladly do it. It has significantly changed me for the better which would aid my future endeavors.

It would be better if you presented the experience through a transitional phase outlook on your life. By that, what I mean is, you can explain who you were before your military training, just a short cut complete description within 150 words. Then you can use the remaining 150 words to explain how the events that followed resulted in an ideology altering experience for you. By using the comparison method, you will be able to better show the reviewer how the regimented lifestyle helped you prepare to become a better student and member of society. As of now, you are just telling a story that doesn't really matter to the reader because of the lack of a backstory.