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'My opinion has never changed.' Chevening scholarship essay - the topic of leadership and influence

Nyamka 1 / 1  
Sep 25, 2019   #1
Hello all!
I am applying for Chevening scholarship this year and seeking any comments on my essay. Please find my essay below. You can comment on only one section of my essay if you don't have time to read it all.

Leadership and influence

Chevening is looking for individuals who will be future leaders or influencers in their home countries. Explain how you meet this requirement, using clear examples of your own leadership and influencing skills to support your answer.

I think a good leader is one who leads by action and show what is correct, encourages people and shares his/her experience, has enough determination to stick to his/her true aspiration and has courage to be honest. These characteristics of leader are most important, because I think people are most likely to be influenced when they actually see someone making positive changes for real, even if the change is small or for just one person.

I like convincing others that they can do what I could. To do so, I try to explain how I achieved the result by including practical examples and my own experience. Basically, I try to give them a realistic picture of the subject so that they can have their own plans. For example, I had continuously improved my English within a few years. One of my friends asked me how hard it was as she had doubt with her ability. I tried to encourage her by explaining how a simple set of conditions could result in a dramatic improvement when learning a language. I shared my own experience and strategies which are both tangible and simple. Convinced enough, she is trying to build her own strategy now.

As I was seeking a job after my graduation, I wanted to work as a researcher. I found a consulting company where I could work as an analyst. However, the company offered me a much lower salary compared to other offers I had received from various organizations including banks and financial institutions. I had to make a choice, and I prioritized what I want to do rather than higher salary. Because, I considered that the long-term benefit from my current job exceeded the other options as it would allow me to grow as a researcher and become a gateway to my future career.

I think one should have the courage to not cheat at exams. Because, those who choose the right path over easy one will deserve better future. This is my true opinion, and I always stand for it. For example, cheating exams was norm at my high school. Many of my classmates thought that they have to cheat during exams because they had lower abilities and intelligence compared to some students. However, my opinion was different. I told them that cheating themselves wouldn't lead to the future they wanted. I had to tell the same idea anytime I was asked to join them to cheat. Some of them accused me and called me selfish when I refused to cheat. However, my opinion never changed. I was still telling the same when I was in university.

One essay at one time, please

Otunba 1 / 3  
Sep 26, 2019   #2
I think your definition of a leader is a bit cliché. On the whole there are lots of grammatical corrections that need to be made. Good luck.
OP Nyamka 1 / 1  
Sep 26, 2019   #3
Thanks Otunba! What do you mean by "cliche"? overused or irrelevant/weak?

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