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how to overcome stress with NLP method. an essay for stipendium hungaricum



goingtocollagesn 1 / -  
Jan 12, 2025   #1
hello, hope anyone helps me to correct my grammatically error or anything wrong in my essays. this is my first time...

"Emotions that are never conveyed will never die. They are buried alive and will appear in a worse way." Sigmund Freud

Mental health is still being a taboo things in Indonesia. It causes adolescent to be easily affected by mental illness. According to the data of Indonesia-National Adolescent Mental Health Survey (I-NAMHS) in 2022, there are 15,5 millions adolescents in Indonesia experiencing mental health problems. One of the main reasons why adolescents develop mental health disorders easily is that they are easily stressed out over small things and can't figure it out in the right way.

One of the activities that I do is to be a Quran teacher at the mosque near from my house every evening. I teach children from 4 to 9 years old. Is it easy to teach children? Teaching children is not easy thing to do. The most difficult part of teaching children is how to be patient and how to manage my stress while the children don't want to be conformed to the existing rules. Thing that I do to manage my stress is to tell the story to my father. Then my father teach me how to manage your stress in physcology with Neuro Language Program (NLP) method. NLP itself is psychotherapy, personal development and communication approaches that can help you to manage your stress. Since then I have interest to learn more about physcology. Learning how human behavior is based on their mind is such an interesting thing.

Hello, my name is (my name) decided to continue my studies at Eötvös Loránd University because I believe that Eötvös Loránd University has lecturers who have the best experience in their fields and has an adequate education system. My future plans are to combine psychology with technology in accordance with the times so that it can be approached by everyone, anywhere and any time. And create a youth community to channel mental health knowledge, especially for adolescents in puberty. So that they can be more aware and know how to overcome their stress.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15539  
Jan 12, 2025   #2
Are you applying for the program as an undergraduate or as a masters student? Your essay does not make your student category clear. It should be made clearer to the reviewer as this will affect his assessment of your motivational letter.

The information contained is not very effective in the sense of delivering your motivation for studying in Hungary. It is too simplistic in presentation and does not refer to any unique or notable qualities that you may have as a student. Simply being an active tutor in your community is not enough of a credential for this scholarship program. You have to consider far more than that.

I believe it would be best for you to write a totally new essay that better delivers the motivation for your desire to study this course, the reason for wishing to study in Hungary, and why you chose the university. These must be reflective of your academic goals and considerations which would have motivated your decision to apply for the scholarship.
OsatoOsazuwa 2 / 3  
Jan 14, 2025   #3
This essay doesn't show your personal motivation and academic achievements as to why you deserve such scholarship to study the course of your choice. It feels too brief and not personal.


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