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I would be part of a vast network at Chevening which creates opportunities

Onyinye123 2 / 3  
Oct 10, 2017   #1
Chevening is looking for individuals with strong networking skills ...

networking - nuclear fission

I started attending networking events in 2016, the first I attended was my secondary school Alumni networking event. I had the opportunity to interact with notable alumni and also shared ideas with them. During this event, we recognized the need to grow our network and reach out to other alumni to enable us to donate and develop our Alma Mata. Based on my experience in Social Media, I volunteered and we were able to reach out to several other alumni worldwide via various social media platforms. This task was also beneficial to me as I was able to demonstrate my strength in Social Media management and I got a referral from one of the alumni to monitor the Social Media platforms of a religious organization.

One of the Alumni we contacted was an Ambassador at the xxx Africa, a community that helps young African women achieve their professional dreams. She gave us free passes for the xxx festival organized by xxx Africa which I attended earlier this year, it was an event where women who were at the top of their game could interact with young women who were just starting out. We had a group session with xxxx, a wealth management specialist, who spoke about climbing up the financial success ladder and women supporting each other. To this end, I and ten other working-class women got talking at the event and we decided to form a support group where we focus on our professional growth, keeping tabs on our goals and pushing each other to achieve our set goals.

The network I created at this event has contributed to the success and my value in the NGO which I am currently a part of. For instance, In July, when my NGO kicked off the deworming project, one of the women in my support group introduced me to an official at the National Agency for Food and Drug Administration and Control who assisted with the donation of the drugs used for the deworming project.

Networking can be likened to nuclear fission, you will realize that each new contact you make disintegrates to new contacts thus gradually leading to a group of contacts.

As a Chevening awardee, I will be able to collaborate with talented individuals from around the world. I would be part of a vast network thus creating opportunities to share perspectives, combine cultures and create new initiatives to support other Chevening scholars and to aid the development of our countries.

Excel2017 - / 9 6  
Oct 11, 2017   #2


Your first paragraph seems off from the prompt requirements. You talked about the social media, Facebook and others which made it seem like you didn't understand the context you are to answer from.

Your second paragraph has it! What is needed. The referral from an alumni to attend an event. It would be better if you took time to build around your second and third paragraph (the deworming project). Explain extensively how these professional network transformed your projects into a success.

The Fourth paragraph is really not necessary because the reviewer is not ignorant of the benefits of networking.

So if it were up to me, I would suggest you blend a part of your first paragraph with the second paragraph. Then make the rest about your project! Link them all and you will have a great piece.
OP Onyinye123 2 / 3  
Oct 11, 2017   #3
@Excel2017 Thank you for the feedback. I'll work on the first paragraph and build the second and third paragraph.

@Holt Please take a look at my essay, i look forward to hearing from you.
Holt [Contributor] - / 9,022 2714  
Oct 11, 2017   #4
Onyinyechi , there is too much "we" in this essay that should be more about the "I" in the network creation and function. The reviewer isn't interested in how the team formed a network to accomplish a task, he is interested in your ability to create an independent, professional network that can help to increase the strength of the Chevening Scholar network. In order to impress the reviewer, you must add a series of professional networks based upon the demands of your current job. After all, that is what you are applying for the scholarship for. There is a lack of reference to how you created and cultivated these networks. It seems to me that there were already pre-existing networks that were handed to your group on a silver platter when you had some projects to enact. It is the pre-existing condition of these networks for your team that created a weak networking essay for you. Unless you can prove that you have the ability to create your own network, flourish in the use of that network, and depict a method by which that network can be of use to Chevening scholars in the future, then this network essay is nothing more that a practice narrative essay. The only part of the essay that seems to have some sort of strength is the part where you were introduced to the official of the National Agency, but then you did not fully develop that discussion in terms of how you cultivated that network after the introduction.

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