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I always participated in activities of student-led organizations ever since I started university.

Nana Byl 2 / 4 4  
Nov 1, 2019   #1


Chevening is looking for individuals with strong professional relationship-building skills, who will engage with the Chevening community and influence and lead others in their chosen profession. Please explain how you build and maintain relationships in a professional capacity, using clear examples of how you currently do this, and outline how you hope to use these skills in the future.

I probably have passed the word count and would appreciate any deductions too.

Studying is more than just a degree. Instead, building relationship and network is one of the most important things whilst on campus. So, I always participated in activities of student-led organizations ever since I started university. In 2016, I got the chance to be the an SRC General Assembly Representative and also 1st deputy speaker of Parliament for Jean Nelson Hall. I always believe in the power of networking. Even more so, in this modern era. Therefore, from my freshman year to graduation, I had already participated in conferences for example the SHRM-Forum Ghana, Centre for Ageing Studies, and Africa HR Leaders conferences in order to build my professional network from diverse industries around the world.

At the 4th Public Service Commission Conference for HR professionals, HR professionals from different industries presented role specific education and capacity building to over 240 professionals that were present. From the event, I got the chance to interact with and build relationships with members of the HR fraternity. For example, I met Mr. Edward Adu, a renowned HR professional at Zenith Bank Limited and a conference participant. His expertise on and passion for work life balance, how to adopt to AI taking over human resource roles like recruitment and the need to bring back the 'human' in human resources awed me to the core and impressed me so much that I decided to request to engage further on the subject which he happily obliged. I maintained regular communication with most of the people I met at the conference exchanging intriguing ideas and viewpoint on HR given the rise of technology on the job and the unease it brings.

With the increasing number of reports by students on the difficulty of accessing internships, the SRC General Assembly charged an ad hoc committee to solicit internships for over 500 students of which I was a member. I knew I had the network to both my university and human resource professionals. By taking advantage of my networking, it became possible for us to provide over 460 internships to students and also hold career events during hall weeks and my church's youth assembly, with great speakers from across the country, for example Dr. Hazel Berrard Amuah from Guinness Ghana, Papa Kwesi Arkhust among others, thus, building a broader network. Mr. Edmund Adu also mentored me on my career and I have discovered my passion for human resource management. Thanks to my inquisitiveness and proactiveness to get more experience in the field, he referred me to a part-time HR opening with a start-up doing amazing work on developing software for local businesses whilst I was still in school. In turn, I was able to provide for him some data regarding work life balance and commitments amongst working adults and also contribute to his research.

Becoming a part of Chevening community, I believe that global connections to future leaders and influencers is a huge advantage, which will be essential for my personal networking and career development. I am committed to devote my time to maintain my networking in Chevening, thus building a stronger relationship. One way to do it is by attending events while also conduct trainings, seminars, workshops, and inviting some Chevening fellows to share their knowledge and experience to young people in Ghana.
Maria - / 1,098 389  
Nov 3, 2019   #2
@Nana Byl
Hi there. Thanks for coming back to the forum! Hopefully, my feedback will give you insight on how to improve your writing.

First and foremost, I think that you can still merge and integrate sentences that have the same flair or core idea to them. For example, the first paragraph's first three sentences can still be trimmed down to create just one substantive line. Doing this will not only help you save space, cutting away unnecessary and irrelevant parts, but this will also help you have more space for more important discussions in the latter parts of the essay.

The body paragraphs appear to be rather messy for the same reason. I find that the second to the third paragraph do not have a structured writing approach. Try to insert a briefing on what the thesis statement/main idea of the paragraph is before jumping straight right into the facts. Doing this will help you transition better to the rest of your writing.

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