If I were an admissions official, I would look for students who were a little more well-rounded (and who liked chocolate and would bring me some).
^LOL. Yes, INDEED.
As time progresses, computers continue to mold America, shaping it in a manner that benefits and connects today's society. The rapid upgrading of the CPU is beyond amazing!
Computers have gone from taking up an entire room to sitting in our laps in our very homes.
^This is not a personal viewpoint. This is just a statement of a known fact.
What we have and use now can only get better, and that is the fuel that keeps me involved passionately with computers.
As complex as artificial intelligence is, it can be taught, used, and understood not just by programmers but by all, man, woman, and child.
^Statement of a fact again.
That being said,
my main goal is to not only simplify and advance the computer, but to uniquely create and expand!
^Ummm. Not quite feeling this.
As a child, my love for computers started early. It was the year of 1996, the year of Windows 95. Me being able to run my fingers over beige ridged buttons with letters that seemed to magically appear on the screen fascinated me and kindled a deep desire in me to learn more.
^Well, perhaps you should say 'MY BEIGE RIDGED' buttons, because my keyboards have never been beige. Never.
Also, whilst this is a creative sentence, I think it needs some revision. I think there is something that is not, quite right.
As computers were making gradual changes, I was also. I began to study
and familiarize myself with the very heartbeat and organs of the computer. Programming has become a hobby of mine and I often joke that my second language is C++
, a widely used programming language I taught myself through experiment and tutorials
^I doubt your readers, on the Admissions Board, need clarification on what C++ is.Computers are and will always be of great importance to me, and what more do I want then to spend the rest of my life devoted to my childhood desire!
^It is an interesting, genuine, and personal ending. However, I am not sure about it's effectiveness? See what other people think. Overall, I thought that this was quite a good essay, assuming that there is a strict word count.