Over the past four years, I have built a strong network of business professionals and IT experts

Hello,

Kindly review my networking essay and provide feedback.
TIA.

Networking Essay - Chevening Scholarship

Over the past four years, I have built a strong network of business professionals and IT experts in Pakistan. Being landed the first job at XXX in 2013, which highly incorporated conducting sales meetings and maintaining strong business relationships with all the current and prospective clients, I was able to make regular contacts with many experienced and professional people from the technology industry, particularly in Karachi. I established my contacts by conducting meetings, maintaining follow-ups and inviting my clients to different IT exhibitions and events in which my company participated.

I had the opportunity to complete my high school education from Muscat, Oman where I build a strong connection with my fellow students before moving back to Pakistan. I was benefitted with my networking efforts in 2015 when I was assigned a project, which required acquiring a quotation from the sub-contractor of an international company. The subcontractor of the company for the South Asia region was operating in Oman and one of my school's class-mate worked there as an International Sales Officer. I have been in contact with my school friend since I left Oman, therefore I effectively negotiated with him on the pricing and requested for a special discount in the quotation. As I was known to him both personally and professionally, he persuaded his Manager successfully to offer me a discounted quote. My connection with my school class-mate greatly helped my company for that project and I was able to build a strong business relationship between my company and the sub-contractor, which made my company, received many discounted quotations for different projects in the future.

Since joining XXX as a Product Specialist Engineer in 2016, I was able to extend my existing professional network. I was introduced to the new contacts by my colleagues at business meetings. I have utilized these contacts to act as speakers at the business partner symposia organized by my company and to acquire positive testimonials from them based on their experience with XXX. By maintaining a healthy business relationship with the existing clients, I was able to add new customers to the company's clientele.

Earlier this year, my networking connections benefitted me when one of my old clients from XXX, invited me to speak at a business seminar for young engineers, where the professionals from the technology industry discussed the career opportunities and tips to become a successful engineer. That seminar gave me the opportunity to connect with the young minds and share innovative ideas with them.

By becoming a successful Chevening scholar, I plan to use these events as a platform to educate the young engineers about the esteemed Chevening Scholarship. Extending the prestigious Chevening network to my professional network will help me in connecting with young engineers and industry professionals who aspire to become a Chevening scholar. By sharing my Chevening experience and highlighting how this opportunity can help them in progressing in their individual careers as well as contributing towards a progressive and prosperous Pakistan.

hey rahma, I try to give some suggestions.

in paragraph 2, that is good networking, but I think you should smooth the statement ''which made my company, received many discounted quotations for different projects in the future.''. that will better if you said that your company has increased their income because of agreement on price reduction in projects future.

It means that you have a skill that capable to increase your company's profit

in paragraph 3, I think you should explain more, as a viewer, I do not clearly understand, that work better if you give an example to your essay

good luck, I hope that useful.

Rahma, this is actually a networking essay that you can use without any revisions. I am impressed by the chronological way that you presented the method by which you developed your network through your profession. Even more impressive, is that you were able to justify your academic network in such a manner that thoroughly showed off how these academic contacts became useful to you during the course of your career. I would however like you to edit the term "school-classmate" Either the person was your school-mate, meaning you were friends in the same school but not the same class or, the person was your classmate, meaning you studied in the same school and in the same class. That is an error that shows how uncertain you were about how to present the network connection. Opt for one presentation or the other, not both.

@Holt
Thank you once again for your feedback :) I am ready to submit my application now. Your support has been very very helpful so thank you so very much :)