I AM WRITING A SCHOLARSHIP ESSAY FOR MEDICAL PROFFESIONS AND I WOULD BE REALLY THANKFUL IF YOU COULD PLEASE REVISE IT. THE DEADLINE IS JUNE 30
DUE: JUNE 30, 2007
THE STRAIGHTFORWARD MEDIA- MEDICAL PROFFESSIONS SCHOLARSHIP
1. Why did you choose a medical profession over other educational opportunities? And what contribution will you make to the medical world?
It is in me. I can feel it. Have you ever had a sensation like you were meant to be or do something in life? In my case, I always knew I wanted to be a doctor. I was six years of age when I first heard about the doctor in my family: my grandfather. I never met him, but dad told me fascinating stories about who I can call my hero, because he represents everything I want to achieve in life. Of course, I did not know this until I reached an older age and understood the value of these stories. So all I could do was to carefully listen how my grandfather passed from being a simple peasant in a small town of Colombia, to being the most respected cardiologist of Pereira, a main city in this country. He was the city's doctor, and not only was he known for his incredible ability to heal, but for his kindness and compassion. These three qualities make up a real doctor, my dad told me once. It was at that moment, at the age of six that I decided to be a doctor. Maybe I was not too serious, but I can remember that sensation of bursting in my veins and butterflies in my stomach every time I watched the Discovery Health Channel go to the operating room and display a medical procedure, a show that terrified my mother but intrigued and fascinated her little daughter.
As I grew up, my decision never changed. While my friends passed from wanting to be astronauts to veterinarians to police officers, I knew that I would never fit in any other occupation, and so not only them but my teachers noticed my determination and I became the most requested science tutor in my junior high.
At the age of thirteen my other grandfather developed a tumor in his cerebrum. It was very close to the cerebellum, but it affected mainly all of the cranial nerves related to the face expressions, talking, swallowing, and balance. The doctors said that although they could operate, the tumor was impossible to remove, because it grabbed all of these nerves and my grandfather would end up being a vegetable, or worse, die in the operation room. And so, he decided he didn't want to be operated. He never blamed medicine for not being able to help him, but I did. It was unacceptable to me that science would not be able to save the day, and that the doctors could not do anything about it. Much worse was the news that I was leaving Colombia, and moving to the United States, because my parents felt that I had more opportunities of reaching my professional goals, since they saw in my eyes I was determined to make all my childhood dreams a reality. It was devastating leaving my grandfather behind, not knowing if I would see him again in my life, because the tumor was growing rapidly.
Moving to the United States may have relieved my suffering and I started to focus on my studies. Starting with IPC, general biology and chemistry, a growing passion for science struck me during my early high school years. So after completing my credits I signed up in my senior year for three classes that would shape the way I see science: Anatomy and Physiology Course, Advanced Placement Biology and a Health Science Technology program. During this year I had the opportunity of going to a gross anatomy lab and see a corpse with its organs in place. It was an unforgettable experience that captivated me and wrapped me into the amazing world of anatomy. In other occasions I also had the opportunity to dissect brains, hearts, eyes and other organs that showed me the marvelous details and perfection of the body. I learned deeply about all of the human structures, functions, and homeostasis. There was nothing more fascinating to me than seeing all the systems and organs work together in complete balance, and how a little imbalance can disrupt the whole functioning of the body.
Then I started doing more research about the brain. I wanted to know the structures that my grandfather's tumor affected, and I ended up knowing all the brain's anatomy and a great extent of its physiology. It was at age fifteen, that I made the decision I wanted to be a neurologist. I want to solve what science couldn't solve for my grandfather four years ago, and be able to help millions of people that are going through the same situation. Instead of people encouraging me to pursue my goal, I heard many times that I wouldn't me able to do it because "the career takes too long", "it is too hard" or "your are not going to have a life". But I was never discouraged by my family's and friends comments that were simply worries of my uncertain future.
I want to contribute to the medical world by solving the mysteries of our brain. I also believe in what many people call the power of the mind. It is amazing how some people develop parts in their brain that enables them having especial qualities and abilities. On the other side, apart form my research contribution to science, I want to be able to talk to my patients and be a humanitarian doctor; medicine should reach very single social level and economic level, to people of all the ethnicities and all languages. I believe in the healing power of laugh and of happiness. I would like to teach my patients live healthier and happier lives, and be able to teach them about their conditions and what science can do for them. I believe there is a connection between one's mind and what I call our soul. If one can connect these two things and use them together for the sake of healing, miracles can happen. Also, my medicine is going to reach every part of the world, not only is going to be available in the United States, but I plan to travel to Colombia, other South American countries, Africa, and the rest of the countries, targeting at socially depressed countries that need more medical progress. Deeply in my heart I know I will be a doctor, and I will be able to realize the projects that I have in mind.
I graduated form Katy High School last May, and I will start going to college the fall of this year 2007. Although my family's economic situation is very unstable, we are willing to do what it takes to help me get through college and be able to apply my knowledge in the service of the community. My mom is currently attending college and so the costs are arising for our family. This scholarship will help me in fulfilling my goals. I want to heal people, and change lives. I also want to know more about the human body and its intrinsic functions. Some people call me a dreamer, but I would say I am a person with clear goals. Am I too young to know what it really takes to be a doctor? No, It was clear for me since I was six years old.
2. How will a StraightForward Media Medical Professions Scholarship help you meet your educational and professional goals?
When my family and I came to the United States, my father passed from being an important executive in a company in Colombia, to holding jobs in restaurants and pizza places. Because of this, our income level and standard of living had to go down. The Medical Professions Scholarship will help me and my family with the cost of education, because medicine is a very expensive career and without financial aid, I will not be able to complete my college education. Also, my mother is attending college and it is very difficult for my family to keep up with this expenses. Neither I nor family thinks that dreams should be stopped because of financial problems, because passion and goals is what make us to survive any hardships. This scholarship will be of great relieve in our financial burden, since I am the first daughter entering college and will help me fulfill my goal of going to medical school and becoming a doctor.
Great essay! I have just a few suggestions:
but my dad told me fascinating stories about the man I can call my hero,
all I could do was to carefully listen to how my grandfather passed
he decided he didn't want to be operated on.
my parents felt that I had more opportunities for reaching my professional goals; they saw in my eyes I was determined
going to a gross anatomy lab and seeing a corpse
On other occasions
"you are not going to have a life".
friends' comments that were simply worries about my uncertain future.
some people develop parts in their brain that enable them to have special qualities and abilities.
Also, my medicine is going to reach every part of the world. Not only will it be available in the United States,
the costs are rising for our family.
it is very difficult for my family to keep up with these expenses.
Neither I nor my family thinks that dreams should be stopped because of financial problems, because passion and goals are what make us survive any hardships. This scholarship will greatly relieve our financial burden, because I am the first daughter entering college and it will help me fulfill my goal of going to medical school and becoming a doctor.
Best of luck!