Greetings. Please judge me harshly, for my own benefit.
I was asked if the advantages of teaching Foreign Language to students in secondary education outweigh to that of teaching the same subject to students in the primary education. Did I phrase that question correctly? I basically understood it in a way that I have to do a comparison between them and take a stand at the end.
All throughout the human history, Education has consistently evolved in response to our society's needs and resources. One major subject that has been affected constantly by the evolution of education is Foreign Language. Some would question its essence and relevance, arguing that it should be taught before pupils reach secondary school. Though there might be a considerable amount of advantages and disadvantages, I personally believe that Foreign Language can be most effectively taught during primary education.
It can be argued that secondary school students have higher awareness on knowledge consumption making them more receptive in learning new languages. Whilst younger students in primary school tend to be unfocused academically rendering average teaching strategies ineffective. In relation to this, a survey has found in 2014 that high-school students are 30% more focused academically compared to elementary students. This is an apparent disadvantage of teaching Foreign Language earlier than secondary education.
A strong advantage of introducing secondary language to primary students is that linguistic learning happens more effectively during school age. Though focus is not their greatest ability during school age years, elementary students possess juvenile left brain hemispheres capable of picking up new vocabularies. A novel example would be the current phenomena where Filipino kids already know hot to speak conversational English without formal education. Apparently, they have learned that this is an evidence worth noting of.
In general perspective, injecting Foreign Language to the curriculum of either primary or secondary education entails certain positive and negative outcomes. Although, I personally think that teaching secondary languages should happen as early as possible. It is when children are curious and interested with their linguistic abilities.
I think the last two sentences would benefit from being combined by continuing the last sentence right after the word possible, deleting the words "although" and "it is" and "with", and adding the word "however" in place of although and "in" in place of with.
ex. However, I personally think that teaching secondary languages should happen as early as possible when children are curious and interested in their linguistic abilities.
Also, regarding the point you made about the survey in 2014, I think your writing would be stronger if you could possibly add an in text citation for that survey so that it doesn't seem made up.
Also, regarding the point you made about the survey in 2014, I think your writing would be stronger if you could possibly add an in text citation for that survey so that it doesn't seem made up.
How do you think should I go with an in text citation?
Also, IT IS MADE UP. Will credibility affect my IELTS score?
Thank you so much.
I wasn't aware it was for IELTS. I'm not sure if it will affect your score, but I strongly think it won't due to the fact that the test is really only about your ability to use the English language. Since it is for a language test, I personally wouldn't add the citation. Sorry about the confusion (:
Gaff, honestly, you didn't phrase the question right, here's my thoughts;
- I was asked if the advantages of teaching Foreign Language to students in secondary education outweighs
- to that ofthe teaching of the same subject to students in the primary education.
- constantly by thethis evolution of education is Foreign Language.
- can be most effectively taught during primary education.
- A novelclassic example would be the current
- phenomena where Filipino kids already know hothow to speak
- Apparently, they have learned that this is an evidence worth noting of.( this sentence is unnecessary as you have already established your point of self taught language adaptability )
- In a general perspective,
Gaff, it's good that you ended this essay with a personal note and the fact that you were very objective helped your essay create that personal effect while maintaining the purpose of the essay. For future reference, proof reading your writing pieces is very crucial and always be careful with the words you use, typo errors too.
@justivy03
Thank you so much. I was just wondering, to what extent can a sentence be in its most complex form?
Here is an example I made. I'm not sure if it is complex enough but I'm in doubt if it still holds meaning and grammatical correctness:
Initially, in the year 2000, it was the voluntary-controlled schools who had the highest number of admissions at 52%, seconded by grammar schools (24%); both the specialist and community schools were at the bottom with both 12%.
Gaff, why would you like to have create or form complex sentences?
This is the question that raised a lot of speculations and thoughts as soon as I read your response,
sentences should be easy to comprehend, meaning easy to understand in order for your readers
to grasp the message of your writing piece.
Anyhow, here's what I think of your sentence.
- secondedfollowed by grammar base schools (24%)...
Gaff, one more thing, how did you categorize the school as grammar base or is this given in the graph, if so it will help us to assist you better is you post the graph or the information for this analysis.
I hope my insights helped.
Hello! Thank you for your response.
IELTS have indicated that they would give more points on complex sentences than the simple ones. I guess what they want is the skill to compose complex yet understandable sentences in academic tone.
And yes, it was indicated in the graph. I could post a snapshot of the graph later for reference. Thank you.
