Hi everyone!
I'm applying for Chevening Scholarship so I have written my LEADERSHIP & INFLUENCE QUESTION, Can you give me some feedback please? I do wanna know if my scope is right or if I have to make more corrections. Thanks in advance for your support!
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When I was studying in high school, several teachers told me that I was a regular student with no evidence of leadership. Those times I did not have any problem with their affirmations because my only important skills to get better at were informatics and mathematics.
However, everything changed when I started studying at the university due to I was so encouraged to get the best scores possible. Therefore, I had to learn how to work with teams and how to choose correct people. Step by Step, I began to be involved with extracurricular teams so I became representative of Computer Science in the IEEE chapter at the university.
To organize seminars and activities in benefit of the students gave me another perspective, I could solve problems of the student body not only by claiming but also by doing. Then I run for president of the student center of my career and I won with the 78% of votes. As president, I organized events of sport, training and debate. I also acted as a mediator between students and administrators of the university.
My first priority was always to get the best scores possible, on the other hand, I had the opportunity to be teaching assistant, and thus I taught subjects as programming 2 and calculus 1 while I was a student. This help me a lot to learn how to speech in front of so many people, I could overcome shyness and express my ideas and knowledge.
Since 2014, I have participated in different Hackathons, which are software development contests, with distinct teams. We had good and bad times but we learned a lot by failing. I learnt how to organize a team in order to win without much resources as time and money. In the last contests, I had to lead my team in order to win every contest. However, this year we decided not to participate in more contests and to start a software development company. I strongly believe that skills as choosing and leading people gave me advantage to join my current team and to inculcate entrepreneurship in them.
Currently, we are 6 partners in this entrepreneurship but I am looking forward to joining more partners. I believe we can create a great impact in our society if we solve problems by developing software solutions. I do know that I cannot do everything by myself and if I lead a group of people to give the best of themselves, we can reach the stars, we can generate benefits for our society.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Turi, the beginning of your essay is quite promising. It shows how people felt you were not really going to have any important skills that could help you in the future. Then you mentioned becoming council president of your chosen major. That was a real game changer in this essay. As far as I am concerned, the opening statement should be kept and the premise of you becoming president should be further developed. The rest of the information should be deleted and replaced with more relevant information.
I suggest that you concentrate on building the image of yourself as a leader by choosing one of the major problems yo faced as president of the council. what you need to do is relate an event, maybe a student activity, that was difficult to accomplish either because of non-cooperation of the student body or school administration. It has to be a problem that proves you were able to inspire the student council and the student body into action in order to prove that your detractors were wrong. That when the need arose, you were able to meet the challenge as a leader and influencer, Even though you did not care to be one or thought you could be one yourself.
