Prompt: A personal statement describing:
-Your field of study and your goal when studying our school
-What knowledge in the program will help you achieve your goal
-Why do you deserve the full-ride scholarship
-extracurriculars and activities showing your leader ship skills
Sitting there with 10 different pairs of eyes glaring me down, all eagerly waiting for an impeccable order, my heart was pounding, and yet I froze like a deer caught in the headlights.
Our house at summer camp was participating in a debating round, and I was appointed as the captain by our mentors. I sat there, baffled. How was I supposed to lead this army of 10 inexperienced people? On the verge of panic, I took a deep breath, trying to calm down and looked around. After carefully scrutinizing my team members, I put the outgoing and talkative individuals in charge of the actual debating while delegating the brainstorming of ideas to more introverted teammates.
On my part, I utilized my past debate experience to keep everything in check, making sure our points were viable and aligned with the proposition, giving advice to our speakers on how to deal with counter-arguments. Noticing a member being inadvertently excluded, I specifically requested his input, as I believed everyone has something to contribute. A boy with a passion for science, not the subject of debate, but it was his fresh perspective that won us the day with scientific evidence to back up our ideas.
That day I realized my strength as a leader, someone who can see the underlying potential of others, hear their voices even when they can not hear it themselves. This epiphany led me to take on leading roles in countless other activities, both in and out of school. Be it from teaching neighborhood kids shuttlecock kicking to guiding new students to my high school, I was there to lend a helping hand and be proactive. Finally, this talent led me to Marketing, a field demanding the ability to realize the best parts of a product to promote. For me, not only is choosing to see the best in everything a way to sell, it is a good way to live. With the rise of technology, I saw my future in Digital Marketing, a unique program offered only at RMIT University.
My goal in university is to attain a state-of-the-art Digital Marketing education, especially in consumer behaviours, since I have always been interested in understanding people, and how to put that knowledge to good use. Additionally, the chance to intern in some of the powerhouses in Vietnam would be crucial to propeling my career's prospects. I am aware of the excellent reputation and top-notch quality of teaching at both campuses, which solidates my belief that RMIT is the perfect destination for my tertiary education.
I believe I am deserving of the full-ride scholarship because I am a natural leader, always taking care of others and promoting their talents. Should I be selected, I would use my education to further furnish my leading and Marketing skills, contributing them to the service of others. Given the chance, I wish to add my very own unique color to the painting called RMIT. I hope the school gives my application every consideration.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Your reason for believing you deserve this scholarship is unimpressive. Have you studied the requirements of the scholarship? Look at the mission and objectives of the scholarship. Do you fit into their world in any way? Does your leadership skill actually lend itself to the type of leader that the scholarship is looking for? You do not really showcase a leadership role in a manner that would impress the reviewer. The academic leadership is good, but they are looking for social leaders and future innovators who can bring a higher profile to the scholarship in the future. Based on that requirement, your essay does not work well towards promoting your interest in the scholarship. Use extra curricular leadership activities. That is what the prompt states. Do not use the debate club. You should prove to be a community leader more than anything else.
