Benefits to home country essay for a commonwealth shared scholarship
I hope to submit an application for the commonwealth shared scholarship. Please kindly review my essay and give advice if adjustments can be made.
Question
You are advised in your statement to describe how your plan of study relates to development in your sector and country. Please say how, on your return, you will apply your new skills and qualifications, and what outcomes you will hope to achieve. This could usefully be related to a national development priority or objective. Please also suggest how the impact of the potential benefits of your work might be measured.
Essay
Recently Sri Lankan citizens had to suffer from the 3rd island wide blackout in the last six months. This blackout continued for nearly a day. Then the state-run Ceylon Electricity Board (CEB) decided to continue with 6 hour scheduled nationwide power cuts for an entire week as the only alternative to resolve the current situation due to a failure in a single power plant. People of my country still suffer from unscheduled power cuts of 2 to 3 hours per day after the last scheduled power cut, Just like the aftershocks from an earthquake.
The recent power failures have had a drastic effect on the day to day lives of the people and especially on the small scale businesses, which have had to shut down due to power failures. Many households also have suffered losses due to their electrical appliances breaking down with the sporadic power outages. As many small scale businesses are not equipped with generators or back up power, when such sudden power cuts occur, these businesses are forced to shut down as they cannot function and they are not prepared for these blackouts. As a result, the Sri Lankan Government is to bear the heavy cost of around Rs.168 million due to the last shutdown.
Sri Lankan engineers were clueless to resolve the matter since they do not possess the proper technology or expertise. Then the government decided to look for foreign assistance to resolve the problems and the experts' assessment was the technology used in Sri Lanka is too much outdated and has not followed the correct protocols required.
Furthermore, Sri Lanka is a county blessed with countless number of natural energy resources that has not been used to resolve the energy requirements of the country. Though the Ceylon Electricity Board initiated a renewable energy development sector to address the matter, the total contribution from the NCRE (Non-Conventional Renewable Energy) sector to the National Grid still remains small at 9.8% from total power generation in Sri Lanka.
Therefore, the Sri Lanka can solve this energy matters by adopting latest energy and Smart Grid related technologies for the Power Grid while giving priority for renewable energy generation technologies to resolve the energy requirements of the country and to supply low-cost electricity to its citizens. The proposed study in University of XXXXXX will certainly help me in gaining all the necessary skills required to excel in this field and to develop this sector in Sri Lanka. This program will also increase my understanding of the renewable power generation, sustainable development, management skills as well as the leadership skills necessary to be a top rated engineer.
On return, I intend to start working for the Ceylon Electricity Board (CEB) where I would put my developed abilities to better use by introducing latest energy related technologies and trends especially Smart Grid technology to overcome the energy related problems in Sri Lankan power grid. Furthermore, I'm hoping to conduct seminars and awareness program series on renewable energy and how we can adopt them to our country to Sri Lankan higher institutions, CEB and government officials so they would be intrigued by the endless possibilities of renewable energy and take action for the development of this sector.
During the award period I intend to conduct research addressing the Sri Lankan energy situation and hoping to publish them on international conferences so that I will be able to use those research to further improve the development in the energy sector of my country. I'm willing to provide the details of the carried out research to the Commonwealth Scholarship Commission during the award period then accurate information on my contributions and involvements to the development of the power sector after my return to my home country.
I believe that the experience and knowledge I would gain by doing a master's degree in UK would set me apart from my peers as a highly motivated and hardworking individual with abundant knowledge to become a successful Engineer that could make a great difference in my country.
Hi Navoda, first of all, I would like WELCOME you to the EF Family, we are one of the best places you can go to find credible, honest and reliable help on your writing articles and the likes. You can write to us about anything, student talk is one thread where a lot of students and writers alike converge and get connected from different parts of the world.
Now, enough about us and let's slice up your essay. First, mind the presentation of your essay, this is one thing that most of us readers and critiques alike will notice at a glance. I suggest you merge the short paragraphs of the essay and make them into bold ones, this will not only enhance the presentation of your essay but will also keep a formal approach of the essay.
I would like to further modify your essay by sharing some corrections on the last two paragraphs of the essay.
- During the awarding period
- I intend to conduct a research
- conferences so that I will be able to use thosein order to showcase the research
- the details of the carried out research
- the awarding period
- then provide accurate information
- sector afteron my return
- by doing afrom the master's degree
- in The UK
- wouldwill set me
- armed with abundant knowledge
- and determination to become
- couldwill make a greathuge difference in my country.
There you have it Navoda, I hope you find this remarks useful.
