Hello everyone! I'd really appreciate if some of you guys could drop some feedbacks on my personal statement for Korean government scholarship. Thank you in advance!
personal statement
o Motivations with which you apply for this program
o Your education and work experience in relation to GKS.
o Reason for studying in Korea
o Any other aspects of your background and interests which may help us evaluate your aptitude and passion for graduate study or research.
I believe that volunteering your time and energy to help others doesn't just make the world better-it also can be beneficial for you. My experience of volunteering at local orphanage as teacher on art masterclass opened me the new world named «teaching». I was amazed by children's enthusiasm and hunger for knowledge. Since I loved spending my time with those students by sharing with them my knowledge in art and design, I started doing these classes in regular bases. The fact that two of my students enrolled to Art Academy inspired me and I found fulfillment in influencing those students and helping them in shaping their future. It remind me my grandfather's words who used to work as a teacher for 50 years: If you know something you can contribute the world but if you can share your knowledge with others you can change the world. All of these things inspired me to turn my way to mentoring new generations of designers. Those I decided to become a Communication Design Professor and apply for GKS program.
I graduated the major institution for learning art and design in my country - National Academy of Arts in 2013. As I have very strong inclination towards art and crafts since childhood my choice of major was obvious. From the first days at the Academy I fell in love with graphic design. Diving deeper into this area, I realized how big and important role design plays in our lives. Architects and designers make culture. We literally create the world around us.
During 5 years of learning graphic design I have made amazing improvement in painting and design skills. I took an active part in the student life, participated in conferences and exhibitions. The first place in the competition for the logo design of the cities of Kazakhstan and the 4th place in the Almaty Design Week made me believe in my strength and inspired to study even harder. My love for design and thirst for knowledge not only helped me to become a group leader, but also to achieve high academic grades and graduate from the Academy with a high GPA 3.67 from 4.0
My final thesis was: «Popularization culture through design: Kazakh national musical instruments». The main goal of the project was popularizing Kazakh traditions by using innovative design methods. I have done a deep research in order to find an effective ways to create an intelligible design which can show all features of Kazakh culture. The project was highly estimated by 4 professors and Chairman of the Union of Kazakhstan designers.
I'm planning to do the next thesis about the ways of creating traditional, specific and recognizable design style of the country.
After graduation, I experienced working in different areas of design. I started my career at BMG company where I have got a chance to put my skills into practice. Here I have gained knowledge of working in different software programs and learned how to translate a sketch into a real project. At the top branding agency Bigname I practiced collaborating design with digital marketing and have created my first web design project. By working with the largest Kazakhstani companies, I learned how to professionally negotiate with customers and competently present the project to an audience. Over the five years of working in the Alliance of Women's Forces of Kazakhstan, I have learned to work independently and to take full responsibility for the project. By working in European company in Malta, I have not only got the opportunity to exchange experiences with foreign colleagues but also add new elements on my design technic. Currently I am exploring printing area in letterpress studio where I am learning how to work on 19th century printing machines.
My love to Korea began in 2006 with Korean drama «Full House». From that time to these days Korean culture has become an integral part of my life. There is something absolutely fascinating about the Korean culture. It has taken over the entire world, with Korean pop music, dramas, makeup, fashion, and other areas where Korea dominating the scene. During my first trip to Korea, I was amazed by architecture and transport system, diversity of restaurants and cafes, peoples kindness and helpfulness. Of course, among all astonishing things about this culture is Korean designs that had just blow me away. Even stepping into the airport, it was evident that this was a place that infused carefully crafted design with day-to-day living. I found that country has succeed in creating its own recognizable design style. It can be both modern and traditional, familiar and innovative. There are aspects that I feel missing in Kazakh design and which I would like to develop by using Korean experience.
In order to better understand the culture, last summer I started learning Korean in local language school. Participating in events related to Korean culture also helped me to get closer to Korea. Couple of months ago, I went through all the selection stages and became an official Korean culture supporter in Kazakhstan. Also now I am a part of a big project named «Kazakhstan and Korea - so close» which aims to develop friendship between Korea and Kazakhstan. By drawing illustrations for this project, I found that there are so many things in common between my country and Korea.
One more reason why I would like to pursue my education in South Korea is XXX University with its innovative teaching approach, research facilities and diversified curriculum. It is an ideal multicultural platform offering enormous exposure, understanding and inspiration. There I found all the subjects I want to learn deeply during my Master's program such as User Interface and User Experience design, Advertising and Motion Graphic design which develop both theory and practice. I wish to further explore the new communication approaches in design under the guidance of design professors, who have amazing experiences in different areas of design.
Also, during Master's program I would like to use all the opportunities to broaden my knowledge in design by exploring Seoul Design Festival where I can learn new design trends along with corporate brands, Daegu Art Fair where I can meet various renowned art works of Korean artists and designers. I would like to continue my volunteering and sport activities as well as drawing digital illustrations because helping others, participating in running marathons and painting are fundamental to my identity and help me to stay focused on design.
I thank you for consideration of my application.
Ainur Madrisheva
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Your decision to become a professor is separate from your decision to apply for the GKS program. You should separate the statements because those have differing consideration factors that helped you make the decision. There is no connection between the two as you could have opted to study a masters course in your own country if you wanted to, and become a professor just the same. The GKS has nothing to do with that.
What sort of deep research did you have to do for your thesis? Expand on that discussion for the research acumen portion requirement of the motivational statement. You need to enhance that portion as it is a necessary section of the essay, as per prompt requirements. There is no need to mention your masters thesis in this essay. Save that for the Study plan essay.
Your reason for choosing to study in Korea needs to be profession related. Discuss the accomplishments of Korea in this field instead. That is what will interest the reviewer more than the Hallyu and K-Pop, or Koreanovela references. These reference points are common, weak, and rather unrelated to your academic interests. The rest of the paragraph make it sound like you want to be a tourist in Korea rather than a student. You have to refocus the content of that paragraph to ensure the applicability of your reasons for studying in Korea.
Hello! As I will apply for GKS, I would like to give some suggestions. I think you have a really big chance, I really liked your essay, your background looks perfect. I will do the same request, do not mention about kpop, it looks so simple. Just guess how many people will say they liked kpop and drama. Other reasons seem much more logical. Beside this, in the beginning of your essay, you mentioned " If you know something you can contribute ..." This seems like it is your theme for essay but that was all. Then you stopped mentioning it. Where is your enthusiasm? I haven't seen you had more teaching experiences.That doesn't seem right to me. With your background, it looks you can do better than teaching. Changing your theme may help.
I hope that helped. Good luck!!
Hello, if my memory serves me right there are 2 essays you have to write for G-GKS which are a personal statement, which aims to describe you as a person and a statement of purpose, which aims to present your study plan. I think the second half of your essay above is more like an SOP rather than a PS. You should spend it in your SOP instead and use this PS to describe you fully. Moreover, I believe you should split your bodies into 4 separate paragraphs following the guidelines so that the readers can easily follow and don't misunderstand your purpose of writing.
Hi, I like your essay. However it is better for you to mention another area in arts and culture since mentioning k-pop or k-drama is quite mainstream.
