This a answer for a question of an application for scholarship it said:
Describe how you can contribute to the diversity of the university and the value you see in service community?
I can contribute in different ways to the community teaching all the things I had learned from those opportunities and experiences that I had. For example, from my experience in working as a volunteer in a home care center for seniors I learned how to be patience, how to work with people with Alzheimer's disease, be responsible, help each other and to communicate effectively. It also taught me the importance of the care for people with Alzheimer and I become very enthusiastic to help them every time. I would like that people learn those things that I had learned to become a better citizen and be successful in life. Furthermore, I'd like that people become more interested in learning other important languages such as Spanish and I could bring my help giving them tutoring or improving their Spanish skills. As a experienced athlete I could help athletes become successful in their majors by creating consciousness of the importance of their major as well as their relative sport. Moreover, I could bring my help to homeless people, ill-treated children, ill-treated women, handicapped persons and many more carrying situations.
I believe that helping people is a key to success in life because every time you help a person you learn a new thing that you need to apply in your life. For this reason, I will be helping people every day and contributing in community needs inside and outside campus because I want to learn more and more.
Is this ok?
Hi!
I've read your essay, it's not so bad at all, you have a lot of ideas).
First of all, I think you change the beginning phrase, it is just repeating part of the quuestion. You can insert a sentence about what is service community, why it is important. And then go to the things you, particularly, can do.
"I learned how to be patience" - to be patient
"I would like that people learn those things" - that's not the right construction, but I can't think up now how to correct.
"I'd like that people become" - the same.
May you should state that helping people is not only about learning something new, but also about making someone happier, making world around you better)).
I can contribute in different ways to the community teaching all the things I had learned from those opportunities and experiences that I had. For example, From my experience as a volunteer in a home care center for seniors, I learned how to be patient , how to work with people with Alzheimer's disease, be responsible, help each other and to communicate effectively.
You did not really answer the second question. You should get more specific. Maybe you will talk about a sense of spiritual fulfillment, or maybe you will talk about meeting new people and networking with them. Maybe you will talk about a personal philosophy you developed. :-) So, get specific at the end when you talk about community service.
