Discuss the subjects in which you have had difficulty. What factors do you believe contributed to your difficulties? How have you dealt with them so they will not cause problems for you again? In what areas have you experienced the greatest improvement? What problem areas remain? (Full question) Any ideas, suggestions would help
Ever since me and my parents visited Silver Spring International Middle School, a school I would soon attend, we knew that this specific subject would be very challenging for me. The thought really dawned on me when I realized that everyone around me was speaking a totally different language. I can understand English, in fact I could speak it fairly well, however, I had never seen it spoken in such volume and speed before, with no pauses to allow me to compute what the person just had said.
The easy thing for me to say why the English language is difficult for me is for me to say that I'm an immigrant and learning any language hastily is very difficult. However, I believe that the greatest cause for this difficulty was my fear of the English language. I always feared I would misspell a word or pronounce a word correctly, revealing my thick Ethiopian accent, marking me as alien. I was scared that I would sound different from others, a foreigner, that would butcher the phonetics of their language; that I would destroy such a valued aspect of the American culture, that I feared contempt for such a sacrilegious act. Each fear mounted on each other, to the point that I would only responds in nods and waves.I wanted to fit in so badly, that I didn't want anyone to hear my accent that marks me as different. I was stuck in a loop. Without the much needed practice, I only prolonged my problem.
Due to my lack of confidence to talk to classmates, I sought other ways to improve my English. I started reading any book I can find, the first being "Dealing with dragons." Even though this was a children's book I read it attentively because without my participation in school this was the only way for me to improve my English. I started to speak more often at home; instead of saying something simply in Amharic, I would often prolong conversations with my parents by trying to find the word in English that would fit what I was trying to say. I started to watch movies and TV shows so I could improve my comprehension and listening skills (to my surprise this worked wonderfully). Even though everything I did at home worked well, it was a long process and there were a limited amount of movies and books that I could get. So in the end, I forced myself to confront my problems head on. By eighth grade when I got out of ESOL, I elected to skip taking English and to immediately to go to Advanced English. Luckily, my teacher, Mr. Stelzner, realizing my problem, started to call on me in class, forcing me to answer in front of everyone. At one point, when we were reciting excerpts of Shakespeare in class, he forced me to do mine in a girls voice. Every time I had to talk in front of everyone, or my peers, every time he critiqued my writing heavily, my ease with the language started to increase. I began to talk with others in English, I was able to read books that were more complex. My vocabulary expanded, words like happy, big and good were replaced by euphoric,ample and adept.
All aspects of my English tremendously, each class I took, when each of my teachers forced me to step out of my comfort zone, I propelled higher and higher, I superseded my initial expectations, I planned to be mediocre but I became skilled. The greatest improvement I made was on the skill that I thought would be my weakness, my writing. Even though I didn't have issues with understanding or speaking English, I still was shy. My accent was still there and because of it I still had the wrong perception that it would take away from my accomplishments. However, this problem didn't exist when I had to write which is why I saw more progression. I was able to freely share my ideas without any fear of judgment. I liked the structure and craftsmanship it produced that most common social conversations don't have.
Although I have made great strides since the day I first was enrolled in ESOL 1, communication will be roughly difficult. This is because, from my perspective, ideas or words aren't tied down to a single language. Every though I formulate comes in combinations of English and Amharic. However, everyone else are not able to relate as easily, so it becomes a problem when my speech suddenly changes languages.
