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I can't wait to challenge myself. PERSONAL STATEMENT KGSP/GKS UNDERGRADUATE 2022


odereyn 1 / 3  
Aug 23, 2021   #1

KGSP/GKS application - PERSONAL STATEMENT



Ranking 27 out of 28 students in junior high school was one of the embarrassing moments for me. Since I'm not used to studying, my rank was always below 24 in the class. However, when I was in senior high school, everything changed. In 10th grade, I got ranked 6 out of 21 students. At that time, I realized that I had begun to like studying. I also started to actively participate in every class. As a result, many of the teachers have trust in me. Furthermore, I've noticed how much my surroundings may influence me. With such a challenging environment in high school, I've started to consider my grades and my future plans. Afterwards, I was interested in the industry's basic education, which is business. The feeling of creative freedom and personal satisfaction makes me want to be an entrepreneur because I'll be able to work in a field that I enjoy. I wanted to go overseas for a bachelor's degree, and this time I chose Korea. Why?

First, Korea is one of the countries that have the best education in the world. Korea is ranked at the top of OECD countries for scholastic achievement and educational competitiveness and is noted as one of the safest countries in the world to study in. Also, South Korea was the eighth-largest exporter and eighth-largest importer in the world. South Korea was included in the group of Next Eleven countries as having the potential to play a dominant role in the global economy by the middle of the 21st century. Second, I've been interested in Korean culture since I was in elementary school. The Korean wave has become part of the global culture shared by people throughout the world. By studying in Korea, I hope I will be able to learn more about the cultures and the diversity in Korea. Third, because there are so many international students who come to Korea to study, I may meet and make friends with people from all over the world. As a result, I believe it is a fantastic opportunity to have connections as much as possible from there. Fourth, I have a dream to make my own business, such as a café and an export-import company. Right now, all around the world is affected by Korean culture. Kids, teenagers, and adults are starting to follow and copy Korean fashions, lifestyle, music, and many more. By seeing how Korea had such a big impact on the world, I think it will be a good opportunity if I can bring it to Indonesia. In Korea, I can learn about the business, the cultures, and observe the café around there at the same time because I know Korea has a lot of famous and beautiful cafés that can be my inspiration, so it will become effective.

Other than that, the reasons I want to apply for this scholarship are certainly because the benefits that were provided were really helpful. My family's economics can't afford me to study abroad because it's too expensive for us, mainly because of the COVID-19. Since this pandemic, my father's wages were being cut 50% from the normal. My father is a normal employee and my mother is an ordinary housewife. I have an older brother that is 4 years older than me and a little sister that is 10 years younger than me. As a result, even in Jakarta, my father struggles to pay tuition fees because he has three children who haven't worked. It's been difficult for my family right now. However, my father still gives his best and works hard so that me, my sister, and my brother can go to the best school with the aim that we can have a better life. My parents have always encouraged me and my siblings to be a blessing to others and fight for our dreams no matter how hard it is. I hope I can learn more about Korea culture and help reduce my family's financial expenses from this scholarship.

Recently, I failed to get a scholarship to one of the universities in OO. The failure that I've been through doesn't stop me from pursuing my goals, getting a scholarship for a bachelor's degree. I reflect on the reasons for my failure and learn from those mistakes, so I can be a better person in the future. Then, I remember about GKS which made me determined to become fluent in English and Korea by studying harder and applying for this scholarship. I have a competitive and ambitious nature, so even though I've failed multiple times, I'm still determined to give my best and make my dream come true no matter how hard it is. I'm so grateful because my family and my friends always support me. When you succeed, you earn something. When you fail, you learn something. Both are equally important. I believe the result never betrays the effort. "If you never tried, how will you ever know if there's any chance?" (Jack Ma)

In high school, I was active in extracurricular scout at grade 10 and coding at grade 11. Scout activities like walking through the hills, the river, and the forest are hard for people that don't athletic like me. However, it's made me more disciplined, independent, self-confident, and braver to do something new. For coding, I learn how to make a website. It gives me knowledge on how people make websites or even a game. In this era, technology is required in every part of life. Even in business, we need technology such as social media to promote our products. By joining coding extracurricular, I realize how difficult it is to make a program, but it makes me more thorough, focused, and patient because the level of difficulty is high.

My school also has an entrepreneurship class and I think that's really helpful for students that want to run their own business like me. In that class, I learned how to create my own brand, the booklet of my product, how to promote it, and even we often make some products in the lab. For example, we make body soap. My teacher once gave us a school project to make food products and sell them in school. That time my team and I made brownies. Sadly, because of the pandemic, we have to stop it even though we have already made the product and promote it, but overall, it's still an exciting experience for me.

During my senior high school, I've been actively participating in church activities, and I've been picked to do worship service several times. Furthermore, I often participate in camping events that are held by church and XX(name of my course place). In there, I found many friends and got life lessons, especially in communication and teamwork. Luckily, when I was at a XXcamp event, I was picked to be a leader for my team that consisted of all students from various high schools. I'm really happy because I can bring my team to victory. At the end of the event, some committee members there said that I have good leadership skills and will become an excellent leader in the future. I was really happy, and it's increased my confidence because actually, since 10th grade my teachers and my friends frequently picked me to be a leader in my team for many projects such as presentation, drama, and many more.

In 2018, on my 10th grade holiday, I'm applying for an internship at my father's workplace and fortunately the boss accepted it. So, I took an opportunity to intern for a month at MM at the finance department. MMis a company that works in the manufacture of packing paper, plastic materials, and semi-finished products. The reason why I choose to use my term holiday to work is because I like to be productive rather than doing nothing. I think it will be more useful to look for new experiences. Even though the duration was short, I learned many things from there. For example, how to sort an invoice, input data on the computer, check the stock of products, write a cheque, go to the bank with my workmate, and many more. In brief, my job is to ease the work of the employees there. Certainly, I met many people who are older than me. They treated me very well and I have become friends with them too. From that experience, I got to see a preview about the professional world of work, especially in the finance, business, and logistic field. Despite the fact that the distance between my house and the workplace takes around two hours for one trip and once makes me fall sick because of the exhaustion, that's the experience that I'll never forget. Two years later, to be exact in December 2020, I once sold Korean merchandise to increase my experience. Although I was successful in selling it, I am still lacking in this area, so I need to study more about the business, money management, and many more. From those experiences, I learned to be a punctual, patient, responsible, and hardworking person. Even if I'm still too young at that time, but when it's important to you, then hard work isn't an option. It's a necessity. I'm really blessed to experience all of it when I was in high school. It was really fun. I hope I can do it again.

I can't wait to challenge myself to study abroad and get out of my comfort zone. I'm confident enough to say that I'm capable to survive in Korea because I've been used to taking care of myself since I was in 11th grade. For example, I always take care of my studies starting from the documents for study, preparation for college, and many more. I also started to take care of house courses such as washing dishes, washing clothes, and cooking. I'm doing that in order to be an independent person. As a result, when I have to live alone, I will get used to it and be able to survive. Other than that, I'm a person that can adapt well in a new place. I like to make new friends because I don't like to be alone. I'm always trying my best to socialize with people around me and don't have any difficulty adapting to new places. Many people that I met always said that I'm a kind and friendly person who always smiles. In fact, I'm the kind of person who doesn't like to get into trouble with others, so I'm always chill with everyone in order to give them a comfortable vibe. Therefore, I'm so thankful they think like that. In the end, I hope you can consider my application for the scholarship. Thank you for reading my essay and God bless you!
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4772  
Aug 24, 2021   #2
The essay is too excited. So excited that it is unreasonably long but not always informative in relation to the prompts. consider focusing the paper on your interest in business right from the start. The first paragraph is not interesting and does not connect with any prompt in a useful manner. It fails to be an interesting introduction to your background. It just makes the presentation unnecessarily long. The motivations to study in Korea proves to be well researched but disconnected to academic or professional objectives on the part of the applicant. Use personal instead of commercial reasons. sNever speak of having applied to other scholarships and having failed. It makes GKS appear as a substitute program application which does not look good to the reviewer. Do not discuss any type of religious activity as the scholarship is non-sectarian and any religious mention is often deemed inappropriate.
OP odereyn 1 / 3  
Aug 24, 2021   #3
Thank you so much for checking my essay! I'm going to fix my essay right now.


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