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|I have learned to be optimistic and resolute
3 - It's good to have your prompt so that we can align our comments with that. Next time you make...
Undergraduateyussufosman - Feb 3, 2013 / dumi - Feb 8, 2013
|INFLUENCE OF MY PARENTS; U Central Florida- One faces the future with one's past
Undergraduatejellobello62 - Feb 3, 2013 / dumi - Feb 8, 2013
|I did not have a proper direction; Common App 250-500 word essay.
Undergraduatedavidhenning - Feb 7, 2013 / dumi - Feb 8, 2013
|I WAS BORN IN RIYADH; Story line of MY LIFE
Undergraduatelala 1991 - Feb 7, 2013 / SKhan - Feb 7, 2013
|DAD/ PEY Program; Chemical Eng-UToronto;INSPIRE/EXTRACURRICULAR
UndergraduatePinkers - Feb 2, 2013 / Pinkers - Feb 7, 2013
|Evaluation of SOP for MS in Computer Science
2 - ... "my career" sounds slight repetition. Well, I suggest; These words have always inspired me and guided me...
Undergraduateapoorva_reddy91 - Feb 7, 2013 / dumi - Feb 7, 2013
|Fuel behind Fire; Howard University transfer essay-Strengths, weaknesses & motivation
UndergraduateBlove27 - Feb 7, 2013 / dumi - Feb 7, 2013
|"We Sink to rise" University of Washington Transfer Personal Statement
NEW - Hawaii is a culture of its own. Most non-islanders consider Hawaii as a vacation destination where they can enjoy...
Undergraduateuser808 - Feb 7, 2013 / — -
|I am interested in people,new cultues & new things; Rutgers U- Vibrant community
UndergraduateAbidemi - Feb 1, 2013 / dumi - Feb 7, 2013
|My father suffered from strokes; Why nursing as my profession? Short /Long term goals
3 - I think you can write really well. I didn't come across any grammar or presentation error to highlight except...
Undergraduatefrancescaniu - Feb 1, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|ARCHITECTURE/ WHAT SPECIFIC ASPECTS OF SMITH C WILL BETTER MEET MY ACADEMIC GOALS
3 - Smith College offers the best solution for my enthusiasm for architecture and preference for studying in a women's...
Undergraduatedreamer13 - Jan 31, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|TRANSFERING REASONS & OBJECTIVES TO ACHIEVE; ENGINEERING
3 - Generally I recommend others to start with a positive note on your current college rather than a negative....
Undergraduateyeseniapereyra - Feb 6, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|Helping ethnic people and discovering new modern knowledge
3 - As a kid, I used to dream about winning a scholarship that would help me studying abroad, becoming...
Undergraduatebenvo - Jan 31, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|CHESS PLAYER; U MICH COMMON APP; Community I belong
Undergraduatewerdaje - Feb 1, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|ACCOUNTING,FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT; Personal Statement (MASTERS)
Undergraduateli guo - Feb 5, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|Drawing, Photography & Music; SAIC Personal Statement
Undergraduatekeana - Jan 31, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|Nurses make a difference every day!; Personal Statement (NURSING)
Undergraduatefazebra8 - Jan 31, 2013 / dumi - Feb 6, 2013
|Anyelo almonte - Bloomfield college self recommendation
3 - Thanks a lot...
Undergraduateanyelo70 - Feb 4, 2013 / anyelo70 - Feb 5, 2013
|"Who's that, hunky?" ; UPenn Wharton-EXTRACURRICULAR
3 - Hello, After reading all three of these short essays, I have absolutely no idea what you are talking...
Undergraduateandroid21 - Feb 4, 2013 / admission2012 - Feb 5, 2013
|"Warrior Princess"- KARATE ; Extracurricular activities
UndergraduateEpsilon - Feb 4, 2013 / dumi - Feb 5, 2013
|Global economic structure& fiancial system;GWU Transfer(WHY GWU?)Goals &determination
Undergraduatenair - Jan 31, 2013 / dumi - Feb 5, 2013
|My imagination ; COMMON APP - Extracurricular or Work experiences
5 - I and most of my friend come together, almost every month, and try to explore each character.Much like a...
Undergraduatekabal - Feb 4, 2013 / kabal - Feb 5, 2013
|U OF T engineering adimission essay; engineer is an appropriate profession for me
UndergraduateDAVIDHAN - Feb 1, 2013 / dumi - Feb 5, 2013
|Passion and Inspiration - Queens University Personal Statement of Experience
Undergraduatenataliemd - Feb 4, 2013 / dumi - Feb 5, 2013
|Photography, Psychology, Biology/ Personal relationships; Why Skidmore a good match?
5 - Well.... I suggest you to combine both these ideas and write one answer. That answer would carry more...
Undergraduatedanimeep - Feb 4, 2013 / dumi - Feb 5, 2013
|BACHELORS IN ECONOMICS; TRANSFER - University of Chicago
4 - A little wordy. I might start with a slice of life at your community college - like a question...
Undergraduatekabal - Jan 31, 2013 / abrownie - Feb 4, 2013
|curriculum-Economics, Neuropsychology& Chinese studies; Why Transfer?
4 - This is a really good essay. but i think you can be specific in identifying what facilities you hope...
Undergraduatelauman112233 - Feb 3, 2013 / kabal - Feb 4, 2013
|Sinking Deep into the labyrinths of my mind lays an itch- WHY Uchicago?
4 - Thank You for replying, I have sent one essay specifically talking about learning and how the interest developed, This...
Undergraduatemanjot - Feb 3, 2013 / manjot - Feb 4, 2013
|TRAVEL to the USA; Umass Lowell & Umass Amherst -EXTRACURRICULAR/ WORK EXP
9 - Okay, I could do that. Should there anything else to be done to make the essay better in your...
UndergraduateEpsilon - Feb 1, 2013 / Epsilon - Feb 4, 2013
|I desire to become a leader; Brown U- Interest in Transfering
5 - I think its a pretty good essay but try to elaborate more about brown's open curriculum and what make...
Undergraduateksyar2001 - Jan 28, 2013 / lauman112233 - Feb 4, 2013
|I swim out into the ocean often/ This is store is my home; UPENN Extracircular essays
Undergraduateandroid21 - Feb 3, 2013 / android21 - Feb 4, 2013
|biochemistry and biotchnology motivation letter for Erasmus Mundus, Medastar Program
Undergraduatemoodalo - Jan 30, 2013 / dumi - Feb 4, 2013
|Essay - Thoughts on thesis? - essay for Shakespeare (UAS) class
10 - The character Lago should be in Italics with capital L Iago is a master manipulator whose cunning strength...
Undergraduatestoya - Feb 1, 2013 / manjot - Feb 4, 2013
|Studying with foreign students; My exchange student planner
3 - At first, I was fascinated by the new experiences in foreign countries. However, later I realized it offers...
UndergraduateIcebird - Feb 3, 2013 / dumi - Feb 4, 2013
|Family of mech engineers/Teaching in UofT; UToronto- Physics Teacher
NEW - What skills have you developed through your extra-curricular experiences that will support your future success as both a student...
UndergraduateTengo - Feb 3, 2013 / — -
|Foxconn factory; UMICH- Extracurricular/Work Experience
Undergraduatelauman112233 - Jan 31, 2013 / android21 - Feb 2, 2013
|I am proud to say that I have good study habits - UW Madison
2 - To many people, grades are very important. I would be one of the people who agree that the grades...
Undergraduatexoxo4 - Feb 1, 2013 / Didgeridoo - Feb 2, 2013
|'I move. I change. I create.' - UPenn Ben Franklin essay
4 - I agree with Epsilon; I would definitely elaborate on what things you do that support you labeling yourself a...
Undergraduatekrj0718 - Feb 2, 2013 / Didgeridoo - Feb 2, 2013
|What is regret? ; significant experience, achievement, ethical delima
3 - Reading the first paragraph, I didn't feel like it was the most amazing essay ever, but your writing is...
Undergraduatetiff_007 - Feb 1, 2013 / Epsilon - Feb 2, 2013
|BORN IN BRAZIL; U Mich 250 words "Cultural Salad"
Undergraduatelps55 - Feb 1, 2013 / shad81 - Feb 2, 2013
|Comprehending Math; recent academic challenge
6 - Thank you so much, I don't mind constructive criticism, besides I really needed help to fix this essay! I'll...
Undergraduatejanajackson - Jan 28, 2013 / janajackson - Feb 2, 2013
|BAND/ NATIONAL HONOR SOCIETY; How I can contribute diversity
5 - Expand more on your 'variety in interested and relationships'. I get what you were aiming for but try to...
UndergraduateJames125 - Jan 31, 2013 / tiff_007 - Feb 1, 2013
|U Mich "Not love at first sight" 500 word essay
2 - I really enjoyed it! I'm also studying Communications. Don't really know where else you can improve. Well written and...
Undergraduatelps55 - Feb 1, 2013 / tiff_007 - Feb 1, 2013
|WOMEN WHO DESIRE TO SET PRECEDENTS, CHANGE HISTORY & SUCCEED; U Michigan ; COMMUNITY
Undergraduatehkk24 - Jan 22, 2013 / iprocrastinate - Feb 1, 2013
|My home, My community (Michigan Essay)
4 - I agree with dumi! Also, this sentence seems to me like it needs to be reorganized but dont know...
Undergraduatesanket_c - Jan 31, 2013 / werdaje - Feb 1, 2013
|Fashion is much more than what meets the eye; Fashion Institute of Technology
3 - What makes you a perfect candidate for FIT? Why are you interested in the major you are applying to?...
Undergraduatenicolecunn - Jan 31, 2013 / nicolecunn - Feb 1, 2013
|Working for TSN as a broadcaster; Ryerson U - RTA School of Media Personal Essay
Undergraduatedynagen - Jan 30, 2013 / dumi - Feb 1, 2013
|MOVING TO AMERICA/ Words of Wisdom - AUTOBIOGRAPY
2 - I am also working on the the same essay topic! I am not experience but 15( numbers) " fifteen"...
Undergraduateveexx3 - Jan 31, 2013 / Mysaratoga87 - Jan 31, 2013
|Horseback community; Extra-Curricular
Undergraduatetiff_007 - Jan 31, 2013 / tiff_007 - Jan 31, 2013
|Drabble; EXTRACURRICULAR/ WORK EXPERIENCE
2 - A few minor changes I likeenjoy writing drabble; it is morebecause of how challenging it is ....
Undergraduaterbtrinh - Jan 30, 2013 / tiff_007 - Jan 31, 2013
|Taking care of baby sister/Volunteer SFU;UBC ADMISSIONS - EXPERIENCE/ FIVE ACTIVITIES
2 - Over time, I have learned everything there was toabout tending to a baby. BeingBecause I was the eldest, I...
Undergraduatej011095 - Jan 31, 2013 / Jennyflower81 - Jan 31, 2013
|University of Wisconsin International Undergrad Statements.
3 - Thank you very much! I've always been very bad with punctuation. If your'e sure that these aren't the...
UndergraduateOmarZz - Jan 31, 2013 / OmarZz - Jan 31, 2013
|"The Rut"; Common App Transfer Essay
2 - Fantastic job! I have a few suggestions to change your wording. Gracie is mildly autistic; meaning life is...
Undergraduatekimha3496 - Jan 31, 2013 / Jennyflower81 - Jan 31, 2013
|Pass the NCLEX / Board certified; Personal statement for nursing school
4 - Should I just erase the school part about "after many years of frustration in school and workplace?" Should I...
Undergraduatealiuod - Jan 30, 2013 / aliuod - Jan 31, 2013
|Clever peers/Asking Questions/ USC and SHSS ; JACOB UNI
NEW - I will submit these supplements in no more than 5 hours so it's URGENT and any help WILL BE...
UndergraduateVVCepheiA - Jan 31, 2013 / — -
|First Prize in National Olympiad in Informatics; Lafayette supp- Why not?
UndergraduateVVCepheiA - Jan 15, 2013 / VVCepheiA - Jan 31, 2013
|Small liberal arts school/ Chllenge mentally&academically; Why hobart and williams?
6 - Be more specific! For instance, you can write about a specific program or couse that capture you! And the...
Undergraduatenayelojello - Dec 31, 2012 / VVCepheiA - Jan 31, 2013
|To be an exception; UMichigan - Community
2 - .. "renowned" is generally used with a positive note(The quality of being widely honored and acclaimed) and therefore...
Undergraduatehtn2013 - Jan 30, 2013 / dumi - Jan 31, 2013
|Cuturally diversified India; Umich - Communities
Undergraduatesmellybuns - Jan 30, 2013 / smellybuns - Jan 31, 2013
|Strong commitment ,Research;U Michigan-School of Nursing/Unique qualities
Undergraduatehtn2013 - Jan 31, 2013 / dumi - Jan 31, 2013
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