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|I find the English people very fascinating; People you'd like to know/ GRINNELL SUPP
2 - I mostly find myself being pulled, as an observer, into the world of the characters. This sentence sounds a...
UndergraduateRechy - Dec 18, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 18, 2012
|From Ukraine to Ghana; Richmond University Supplement
5 - Thank you :)...
Undergraduatefwan17 - Dec 18, 2012 / fwan17 - Dec 18, 2012
|Part time job at Softmedia Systems; common app (work experience)
2 - Hi, I've read your essay carefully and I think your experience is great! But there's couple things I think...
Undergraduatearunesh12 - Dec 18, 2012 / FYCHCICI - Dec 18, 2012
|"Broken Bow" MIT Challenge Prompt -
Undergraduatelinting2012 - Dec 15, 2012 / yara - Dec 18, 2012
|I wasn't ready for the commitment of a 4-year university;UIC/ reasons for transfer
2 - My personal opinion is they would find this to be a short answer. Perhaps, you could go a little...
Undergraduatefoxyh - Dec 15, 2012 / nair - Dec 18, 2012
|Students' success in University study
UndergraduateMymy141 - Dec 16, 2012 / Mymy141 - Dec 18, 2012
|Mr. Wong, my music teacher: Person who had a significant influence/Common App
Undergraduateceandrews95 - Dec 17, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 18, 2012
|'Don't panic. You can do this.' I said to myself ; Common App
4 - Thank you so much for the comments! The prompt is: Evaluate a signiï-cant experience, achievement, risk you have...
Undergraduatesmy1510 - Dec 17, 2012 / smy1510 - Dec 18, 2012
|I come from a multicultural household / Describe your world
Undergraduatechrissyc729 - Oct 28, 2012 / dumi - Dec 17, 2012
|I would be delighted to call myself as an Emory Eagle; EMORY SUPP
UndergraduateAmazingEK - Dec 16, 2012 / putnam7 - Dec 17, 2012
|NYU SUPPLEMENT - What Intrigues You - Art of War Sun Tzu
Undergraduatechithon - Dec 17, 2012 / macauleec - Dec 17, 2012
|I didn't want to judge a school by its rankings online - Why Emory?
Undergraduateputnam7 - Dec 17, 2012 / AmazingEK - Dec 17, 2012
|My flight alone - Common App prompt
UndergraduateSilleth - Dec 17, 2012 / Silleth - Dec 17, 2012
|NYU Supplement - Why NYU? / What Intrigues You? "Ayn Rand's book"
2 - Your first sentence has a striking grammar error. You have a dangling modifier "Living in Queens, Manhattan..." ...
UndergraduateMichele2495 - Dec 17, 2012 / DrS - Dec 17, 2012
|UChic Supplement Essay about the archnemesis. IS IT OUT OF TOPIC OR TOO RISKY?
Undergraduateazmain1234 - Dec 16, 2012 / mcig - Dec 17, 2012
|From dad / Woman in history / Unafraid / Community - BARNARD
Undergraduateskhan0924 - Dec 15, 2012 / skhan0924 - Dec 17, 2012
|Gradually, I found my true love: NUCLEAR SCIENCE; MIT
5 - thank you...
Undergraduatearunesh12 - Dec 16, 2012 / arunesh12 - Dec 17, 2012
|I will get to explore my talents and passion for culture and media; NYU
UndergraduateBelievefm - Dec 16, 2012 / chithon - Dec 17, 2012
|With me, the period of revising for master of law examination is the most stressful
6 - Jennyflower81, I have noticed your comments are quite helpful. Could you please review my essay as well. essayforum.com/undergraduate-essays-2/cornell-computer-engineering-und...
Undergraduatethanhhuyen - Dec 3, 2012 / garggaurav1995 - Dec 17, 2012
|We live in a changing world/ Why Business Administration ? (250-300 words)
UndergraduateKarimKMG - Dec 15, 2012 / putnam7 - Dec 17, 2012
|Career goals, efforts, and diversity
4 - Thank you guys for all your suggestions, so I am just planning on skipping the first paragraph. What do...
Undergraduatesg120 - Dec 17, 2012 / sg120 - Dec 17, 2012
|Pharmacy is not a career field I became interested in by watching television ; PS
2 - Sounds good!...
Undergraduatecesarlil - Dec 9, 2012 / essayhelp66 - Dec 17, 2012
|UC Prompt 1 Chess' influence on my life
5 - try just 'experienced' instead you use the word chess too many times. replace it with passion...
UndergraduateDoom - Nov 26, 2012 / thespoonguy - Dec 17, 2012
|I'm writing an essay to show unique qualities to myself. How to make it interesting?
Undergraduatennpurnama - Sep 12, 2011 / dumi - Dec 17, 2012
|I would aspire to become a physician; Johns Hopkins Supp
2 - Great essay! And if you add little bit more about your personality rather than facts of about yourself,...
Undergraduaterbyoussef - Dec 16, 2012 / AmazingEK - Dec 17, 2012
|Shifting to a different city? Commonapp / Signicant experience
Undergraduaterew2402 - Dec 16, 2012 / DDDDISSSSSCO - Dec 17, 2012
|Common App Essay Prompt 1, Building a Raft
Undergraduatelulwut - Dec 14, 2012 / lulwut - Dec 16, 2012
|"the mind is key. Control the mind, control the body" : Yale Supplement
Undergraduatealexb - Dec 13, 2012 / thespoonguy - Dec 16, 2012
|Williams Supplement Window Essay- Any suggestions? ROUGH DRAFT
3 - I like the essay and vivid description. My suggestion would be to elaborate on why it is significant to...
UndergraduateGirlNextDoor - Dec 15, 2012 / alexb - Dec 16, 2012
|stanford roommate essay- debating and the outdoors
6 - I would cut down on the opening few sentences talking about what you expect college life to be like....
Undergraduatethespoonguy - Dec 14, 2012 / alexb - Dec 16, 2012
|William and Mary Supplement Essay- Why I Don't Believe In Punching Pillows
UndergraduateSpringSkies - Dec 15, 2012 / linting2012 - Dec 16, 2012
|"You are not a starter", said my tennis coach. ; Princeton Supplement
Undergraduaterezwan3 - Dec 16, 2012 / rezwan3 - Dec 16, 2012
|'The unity of music' - What matters to you and why? Stanford
Undergraduatenairbear68 - Dec 15, 2012 / xpmichy - Dec 16, 2012
|The opportunities that Cornell provides to students are phenomenal ; Cornell Eng
2 - Success! All our hard work had finally paid off as we now knew that the State Tournament trophy was...
Undergraduatejonesguy14 - Dec 15, 2012 / diebysenioritis - Dec 16, 2012
|Harvard commonapp supplement essays- about use of education
8 - i think it's really coherent and flows well. Good job! just remove that "PROGRAMMING - 11 char word" thing...
Undergraduateshaigupta94 - Dec 12, 2012 / college134nj - Dec 16, 2012
|Stanford Supplement(s): 1- It's our duty to be intellectual 2- Roommate letter
4 - the 2nd one really brings out ur quirky side... makes anyone wanna be ur roommate. very interesting - especially...
Undergraduatesahir13 - Dec 15, 2012 / college134nj - Dec 16, 2012
|'Just fix the world' -Brown: What would I do if I could do something without failing?
7 - And it doesn't have to be really sophisticated. A simple thing such as hunting could reveal a lot about...
Undergraduatekealasophia - Nov 23, 2012 / rezwan3 - Dec 16, 2012
|Common App Essay - What gets me out of bed in the morning
Undergraduatesophiawebster - Dec 16, 2012 / college134nj - Dec 16, 2012
|So here I am - I am ready to be a Carl: WHY CARLETON ?
Undergraduateinkhk - Dec 14, 2012 / rew2402 - Dec 16, 2012
|Being a devote Justin Bieber fan! NYU supplement
8 - Ok. Thanks everyone for the advice. Ill cut him out of it. And what kind of criticisms should I...
UndergraduateBelievefm - Dec 13, 2012 / Believefm - Dec 16, 2012
|"A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies" ; University of Chicago
6 - A question to ALL: Can I write a fiction piece on this prompt? I was planning on talking about...
Undergraduatetimeywimey - Dec 9, 2012 / azmain1234 - Dec 16, 2012
|My common app essay about my life - The Journey with two Omers
2 - overall the idea is good, but grammar needs a little bit of tweaking. your description of two omers is...
Undergraduateputnam7 - Dec 15, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 16, 2012
|Columbia Supplement #1 - meaningful books, publications or cultural events
2 - I think you spend a little too long talking about the content of the book instead of what you...
Undergraduaterooks815 - Dec 16, 2012 / bellem1 - Dec 16, 2012
|Common app essay-The value of education Stanford Supplement #3- What I learned matter
2 - My mentor always told me that details were what made an essay come to life for the readers, so...
Undergraduatesahir13 - Dec 16, 2012 / jingzhao - Dec 16, 2012
|"I want to make homes, not houses, homes" ; FIT application
Undergraduateebm3215 - Dec 15, 2012 / hanksze - Dec 16, 2012
|MIT Essay: The world you come from
3 - Hello a Sun Wukong fever, I think you should go stright to the main idea, the first papagraph...
Undergraduatell931110 - Dec 16, 2012 / YanSun - Dec 16, 2012
|Princeton Summer - I participated in volunteer trips to the asylums in the city
Undergraduatejingzhao - Dec 15, 2012 / jingzhao - Dec 15, 2012
|Occidental Supplements (Why?/Interests/Idiosyncrasy)
3 - oh oops... haha i didn't see your feedback until just now. it was actually due a couple days after...
Undergraduatejosephuong - Nov 13, 2012 / josephuong - Dec 15, 2012
|As a first generation on college student you learn the importance of education
2 - You should also talk about the challenges you faced during school, like getting thru your four years of highschool....
Undergraduatefatoucisse - Dec 15, 2012 / StephR - Dec 15, 2012
|Penn "Engage Academically"- Engineering (Computer Science)
10 - thank you! i will definitely get around to reading yours! specifically, are there any particularly weak parts that I...
Undergraduatebigpapi - Dec 6, 2012 / bigpapi - Dec 15, 2012
|Illinois ESSAY PROMPT#2: One for all, All for one
Undergraduatevadalis - Dec 15, 2012 / averyk - Dec 15, 2012
|Looking Differently- Write about your passion ESSAY
2 - it's a good essay :) You could change the word 'see-able' to maybe 'visible'? and there are a couple...
Undergraduatepaulazh - Dec 15, 2012 / vadalis - Dec 15, 2012
|That day was not just an accomplishment
3 - The overall essay is written well. but maybe you could add how much it actually scares you? I could...
Undergraduatejmonte - Dec 15, 2012 / vadalis - Dec 15, 2012
|I had worked in a physician's office since I graduated high school / Common App.
2 - I think it would be more interesting if you described a specific experience and then elaborated on the effect...
Undergraduatefoxyh - Dec 15, 2012 / nairbear68 - Dec 15, 2012
|'Christianity and alcohol' - Brave New World - Columbia Supplement
3 - Try including the full prompt so advice can be more specific. Your essay, judging from your thread title, is...
Undergraduatemzontario - Dec 10, 2012 / nairbear68 - Dec 15, 2012
|I had adventure first,explanations?Later / Common App
4 - Great editing by petemess95! Now it reads much better! As petmess95 suggests, you should tell them what this program...
Undergraduaterossy - Dec 15, 2012 / dumi - Dec 15, 2012
|a minor in Japanese. arigato gozaimasu !
5 - THANK YOU.....
Undergraduatesharey125 - Nov 27, 2012 / sharey125 - Dec 15, 2012
|Lions village motherless babies home; Essay 2
5 - Is this better? About a year ago, some friends and I visited "Lions village motherless babies home," an...
UndergraduateSadeAjayi - Dec 12, 2012 / SadeAjayi - Dec 15, 2012
|How Cornell helps me with my academic interests; Cornell supplement (Engineering)
3 - "reading teachers face puts up their attendances" Simply hints at the use of facial recognition. "artificial intelligence" LOL,...
Undergraduateshaileshgupta94 - Dec 11, 2012 / coollog - Dec 15, 2012
|Hot, mucky, and grimy; Common App short Essay Comments
5 - Really good!...
Undergraduateeagles94 - Dec 15, 2012 / averyk - Dec 15, 2012
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