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|I stood up and led the exercise : UBC Broad Based Admission Questions for Commerce.
Undergraduatekeelee - Dec 9, 2012 / dumi - Dec 9, 2012
|Engineering is my passion ESSAY(myself); I am desperate to prove myself to the world
UndergraduateParkavin - Dec 9, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 9, 2012
|It's a form of storytelling; NYU SUPPLEMENT ESSAY
2 - It's a pretty good essay! though it would be nice if you can elaborate more on your future plan....
Undergraduatesalehrama10 - Dec 9, 2012 / jaxball - Dec 9, 2012
|Essey based on article; 'I remember my mother sitting in her chair reading aloud'
UndergraduateFarbodbarzakh - Dec 7, 2012 / ah_zafari - Dec 9, 2012
|Why Carnegie Mellon? (Communication Design)
Undergraduatemhanna - Nov 29, 2012 / dumi - Dec 9, 2012
|NYU Undergrad Supplement - What are your own academic interests? computer science
6 - Very solid. I liked reading it. I also agree that your introduction fits in context with what you have...
Undergraduatejaxball - Dec 8, 2012 / DrS - Dec 9, 2012
|The day you were born was the best day of my life: Common App
7 - I have a few more questions. Can I exceed the 500 word limit? If so, how much? Lastly, should...
Undergraduateazmain1234 - Dec 8, 2012 / azmain1234 - Dec 9, 2012
|Born in Guangzhou ; Personal Statement - College Application
Undergraduateloopedd - Nov 29, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 8, 2012
|FREEDOM : Dangerous Driving, the issue of importance to me
Undergraduatekorib - Dec 8, 2012 / dumi - Dec 8, 2012
|'we all will be the greatest'-significant experience
Undergraduatebrightlights208 - Dec 2, 2012 / dumi - Dec 8, 2012
|Duke engineering essay; 'I come from an artistically inclined family'
5 - Your essay reads more like marketing material from duke rather than an essay from an applicant for admissions...especially this...
Undergraduategrateful1 - Dec 7, 2012 / admission2012 - Dec 8, 2012
|Macarons and baking; Topic of your choice/Common Application
Undergraduatekatev - Dec 8, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 8, 2012
|The bitter notes were made honeyed again; Yale Common Ap
6 - Maybe too flowery? The entire piano itself was a dark mahogany, with the grain showing prominently int eh...
Undergraduatemercedes1923 - Dec 7, 2012 / katev - Dec 8, 2012
|I'm just a little on the messy side; Stanford Roommate
4 - Dear Roomie, You're probably looking at me right now and thinking, "This girl is adopted. There's no way she's...
Undergraduateanaiscooler - Dec 8, 2012 / katev - Dec 8, 2012
|Kid Cudi's song comes to mind ; Music is the Influence
2 - Wow, I'm not sure to where you are submitting this essay, but if it's for college I would say...
Undergraduateann_marie - Dec 1, 2012 / katev - Dec 8, 2012
|My family and I moved in the middle of my junior year:Education Interruption
2 - It's important that you talk about how you fought to get back to better grades and relationships and...
Undergraduatesanjudodley - Dec 8, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 8, 2012
|UIUC essay: Past circumstances and choice of major; My enthusiasm about mathematics
2 - I actually don't see any problems with this! It's engaging without being too cliched, and I could really get...
UndergraduateLilian95 - Dec 2, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 8, 2012
|New York City / Playground and classroom / NYU campuses - supplement questions
2 - I think if you just check the "No Additional Campuses" boxes on the supplements, you don't have to write...
UndergraduateiChevy - Dec 2, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 8, 2012
|"Home Is Where the Grillpocalypse Is" ; why Uchicago essay
2 - I have no idea what a grillpocalypse is. How did that phrase immediately make you want to attend...
Undergraduatesarthakjain - Dec 8, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 8, 2012
|UC personal satement - "Out, everything out." The words swarmed through my innocent head
Undergraduategurlib24 - Nov 28, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 8, 2012
|Life is full of ups and downs; issues of personal, local, international concern
4 - Ways you could improve this: 1. Take out the whole beginning until the part below. It is vague...
Undergraduateeng_geek - Dec 8, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 8, 2012
|I envision myself to be a one of the cornellians ; cocornell engineering essay
9 - many , many many thanks for your revision . atleast now i can feel assurance in submitting this essay...
Undergraduatesarthakjain - Dec 3, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 8, 2012
|'Google, Microsoft and Apple' - UC - Describe the world you come from
4 - Computers have made my life easier and more convenient. ... OR... Computers have made many lives easier and...
Undergraduateryanefendy - Nov 29, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 8, 2012
|An Achievement/Risk and how you learned from it; CommonApp Essay
UndergraduateAyeshaRaees - Dec 8, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 8, 2012
|'Started to attend church regularly' -The one that impacted my life the most, A&M Essay A
3 - Hi Garrett94, This is my suggestion for the opening; Jeffery Smith; the name that strikes in my...
UndergraduateGarrett94 - Nov 29, 2012 / dumi - Dec 8, 2012
|My adventurous nature is what I'm proud about, it has boosted up my lifestyle
2 - My adventurous nature is the one that makes me proud the most. It has inspired my character and...
Undergraduateyara - Dec 8, 2012 / dumi - Dec 8, 2012
|Marist College short answer; be able to learn at the Poughkeepsie campus
Undergraduatecourtney24601 - Dec 7, 2012 / yara - Dec 8, 2012
|essay for NUS Admission- the major is Computer Science
Undergraduatenhxu - Dec 7, 2012 / dumi - Dec 7, 2012
|I have set foot on all seven continets! personal and professional accomplishments
Undergraduatetaylerevans - Dec 1, 2012 / kendra_kay - Dec 7, 2012
|Overcoming problems - Common App - personal experience that has changed my life
UndergraduateNicolas40 - Dec 7, 2012 / dumi - Dec 7, 2012
|Leadership, Group work , Perspective, Accomplishing Goals
Undergraduatelalala15 - Dec 7, 2012 / dumi - Dec 7, 2012
|Unique aspect of Lehigh/what subject would you make mandatory?
Undergraduatepetemess95 - Dec 6, 2012 / dumi - Dec 7, 2012
|Overcoming Shyness - Significant Challenge
4 - It would be better if you talk about an anecdote instead of the whole process of overcoming your fear...
Undergraduatelalala15 - Dec 7, 2012 / Nicolas40 - Dec 7, 2012
|NYU Sup ; Academic interests/ What intriuges you: Apple's ability/ Japan
2 - 2nd quesiton: I think your response shows your passion and knowledge about Japan. I would suggest to remove...
Undergraduatekirashuu - Nov 30, 2012 / lalala15 - Dec 7, 2012
|Why your first choice major?/ Title of your life story ? : Emerson College
2 - I have always been attracted to words, and drawn to reading and writing stories. When I am using words...
Undergraduatecourtney24601 - Dec 7, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 7, 2012
|What influenced you/ Dream person/ Work experience/ interests; Syracuse Supplement
NEW - Hi, i'm applying for Syracuse University and here's the short answers for the supplement. i'm not the best when...
Undergraduateislube91 - Dec 7, 2012 / — -
|The Power of Perseverance - PS; My mom has always told me that quitting is not an option
5 - I think your essay is excellent and you clearly write very well. Keep it up, proofread always....
Undergraduateck135 - Nov 29, 2012 / Safire - Dec 7, 2012
|Why Rhodes? Answer with character; 'Research opportunities and fellowships'
NEW - Prompt: Why Rhodes? Character Limit: 1250 While in a session with the adviser at the EducationUSA I found...
Undergraduatemoon05 - Dec 7, 2012 / — -
|Discuss why you want to study engineering and why DUKE? - DUKE supplement
Undergraduatedkjonny - Nov 28, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 7, 2012
|My physics teacher, the person who made an impact on me; UT Austin essay
Undergraduate31eeld - Nov 28, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 7, 2012
|The reasons for transfer; Statement - 'I did an internship at the Salon Du Dessin'
NEW - During my freshman year, I did an internship at the Salon Du Dessin. The Salon Du Dessin is an...
UndergraduateHourea - Dec 7, 2012 / — -
|I represented my school at Physics Olympiad- university entrance essay
3 - I don't want to seem harsh but truthfully, I think the general tone is a bit redundant. There is...
Undergraduatesebastiann436 - Dec 7, 2012 / Hourea - Dec 7, 2012
|'assistant teacher for SAT Math voluneering' - UT Austin Topic B: issue of importance
Undergraduatelilica12 - Nov 25, 2012 / dumi - Dec 7, 2012
|"Why major in film? It's such a waste of your intelligence."
3 - perhaps you wanted to say that you hear those comments again and again, but when you said, ' I...
Undergraduatewilson93 - Nov 28, 2012 / sebastiann436 - Dec 7, 2012
|Choose an issue of importance to you; Stray cats
Undergraduateyueshiqi - Dec 6, 2012 / yueshiqi - Dec 7, 2012
|Additional information essay-special life circumstances - Tsunami
3 - Okkkkkkkk.... this is my little help for you; ------------ I suggest you to remove the example from...
Undergraduatememorysim - Dec 3, 2012 / dumi - Dec 7, 2012
|'Upon Learning English' UC Prompt
3 - I also agree, your voice really came through in the essay which makes it good for a personal statement....
Undergraduateokhabin - Nov 28, 2012 / bigpapi - Dec 6, 2012
|What you learn from cultural difference? rigor in eastern culture/ vigor in western world
Undergraduateyisha - Dec 1, 2012 / yisha - Dec 6, 2012
|Sobering Discovery - UC - the world you come from
2 - Essay is good but needs some work. Many grammar issues and punctuation errors. Content is pretty good with...
Undergraduateadrianpzamora - Nov 28, 2012 / Abby5 - Dec 6, 2012
|EMORY SUP use 5 sentences to describe yourself
4 - The personal statement is an exercise in self-reflection. Questions to consider: What errors or regrets have taught you...
UndergraduateDearcollege2013 - Nov 30, 2012 / Abby5 - Dec 6, 2012
|Page 87 of Autobiography (VCU); the white ceiling, covered in cracks vs inspiration
3 - I agree with admissions... You tried extremely hard to be descriptive but I had no idea why this moment...
Undergraduatezstarbux - Dec 2, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 6, 2012
|"The proof of Gold is Fire" - Fire on Ice
Undergraduatejnichole - Dec 2, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 6, 2012
|Admission Essay for Occupational Therapy Transfer
2 - I think a better angle to take would be "Why I want to be an occupational therapist", not "Why...
UndergraduateJul21 - Dec 4, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 6, 2012
|"Pursuit without passion is trivial" - PTCAS personal statement application
2 - 1. I think you should say "physical therapy/therapist" instead of "PT" (Abbreviating looks very informal) 2. What about...
Undergraduatedroorda - Dec 3, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 6, 2012
|I traveled to Poland; Peace Corps: Cross Cultural Essay
3 - If you need to eliminate words, you can take this whole paragraph out. It doesn't really do anything...
Undergraduatebrenden - Dec 4, 2012 / Didgeridoo - Dec 6, 2012
|Rutgers will open a great deal of opportunities for myself!
UndergraduateJunior1994 - Nov 28, 2012 / pawan457 - Dec 6, 2012
|'putting my thoughts into a sketch' - extracurricular activities or work experience
Undergraduateesarcosmos - Dec 6, 2012 / esarcosmos - Dec 6, 2012
|My Ventures Into The New Lands - harvard supplemental
8 - I have made some changes in my essay , cut down descriptions of monuments and added some anecdotes and...
Undergraduatesarthakjain - Dec 2, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 6, 2012
|'The freedom of speech and thought' - Why Bard College?
3 - Well, a friend was telling me that colleges pick you on how you distinguish the college itself in your...
Undergraduatehashmnahz94 - Dec 6, 2012 / hashmnahz94 - Dec 6, 2012
|This brings to me what I want to be - Syracuse University Essay
Undergraduatemyacobi - Dec 5, 2012 / dumi - Dec 6, 2012
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