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|Describe a challenge or obstacle you have overcome in your life: about my ADHD
3 - usnews.com/education/blogs/professors-guide/2010/09/15/10-tips-for-writing-the-college-application-essay Hope this helps! Good luck! You'll have a great time in college :)...
Undergraduateukballer1012 - Nov 30, 2012 / geebs5 - Dec 6, 2012
|Texas A&M Inspiration essay. 'When I was a child I remember living in a shed.'
Undergraduateshare8a - Nov 28, 2012 / dumi - Dec 6, 2012
|'Raise your hand if..' - UT Austin Type B- Issue of Art Education
2 - I liked your "opening paragraph, " it binds reader and make them read whole essay. This is really good...
Undergraduatekkone - Nov 27, 2012 / deepakbaniya - Dec 6, 2012
|Face your fear! Be courageous! ; UBC supplementary
Undergraduatebillykeyss - Dec 3, 2012 / dumi - Dec 5, 2012
|My father bought me a telescope - signficant experience ;Common App essay
Undergraduatecreepernaut - Dec 5, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 5, 2012
|'The end of the Electoral College' - College App Essay: Electoral Colleges
3 - I have to agree with linting here. It's a great essay, really well written, but it's not what colleges...
UndergraduateLogan2016 - Nov 25, 2012 / amandaco - Dec 5, 2012
|have had fall out on my grades through the semesters
Undergraduateemindreamz - Dec 5, 2012 / dumi - Dec 5, 2012
|Why is Education Important? - the seed of life - Topic B- UT
10 - My suggestion :"Lower unemployment rate among educated individuals was mainly ascribed/attributed to the fact that companies...
UndergraduateAshley5789 - Nov 30, 2012 / ah_zafari - Dec 5, 2012
|"In your face, I did it!" ; naive to strong
Undergraduatekatyaa123 - Dec 5, 2012 / katyaa123 - Dec 5, 2012
|'self-thinking citizens' - Purdue education to achieve personal and professional goal
3 - Thank you...
Undergraduateearth - Nov 24, 2012 / earth - Dec 5, 2012
|It allowed me to discover my passion for business ; UC Transfer Prompt #1
3 - "a little to confident IN my abilities" "and realize that a career in health care administration was where I...
Undergraduateshmee2 - Nov 25, 2012 / amandaco - Dec 5, 2012
|Hi! My future amigo; Stanford Roommate essay
4 - with love is a bit extreme... try some other salutation. "so the next thing you will see is a...
Undergraduatesarthakjain - Dec 1, 2012 / college134nj - Dec 5, 2012
|I'm looking forward to closing one chapter of my life and to begin a new
2 - After researching this therapy approach and discussing it with my professor I feel ------------ (great promise, future plans, how...
Undergraduatemwslp - Dec 5, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|UBC SUPPLEMENTARY ESSAY; experience/ significant challenge/ activities
2 - They actively (enthusiastically?) ran around and chased after the ball, trying to score on us. Life is...
Undergraduatezxcero - Dec 4, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|Should I make it more personalized?Extra Curricular Common App Entry:
UndergraduateKOessay - Nov 28, 2012 / guyinblue - Dec 5, 2012
|How orchestra impacted me (Texas A&M Topic C)
2 - Music was my passion. You may want to start out your paper with something a bit less cliche. ...
UndergraduateAshley5789 - Dec 4, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|College Comp Portfolio - An Ironic Break; earn the position as the starting goalkeeper
Undergraduatekmurph14 - Dec 5, 2012 / 672jade - Dec 5, 2012
|Propsal Essay on Animal Tessting; Animal Cruelty is terrible and should not be legal
2 - BecauseI t is not required that scientists report how many mice, rats, or birds are used for experiments, but...
UndergraduateKatelan - Dec 3, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|'the patient differential diagnosis' - learned from an extracurricular activity.
2 - Hi :) You have done a wonderful job with this paper, very impressive! I think that your topic is...
Undergraduatetinkerbellcutie - Nov 24, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure"
Undergraduatemcast187 - Dec 2, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|I want to make a change in my community; exceptional hardships, challenges, opportunities
2 - Many people haven't even heard of this town and I have the dream that Hidalgo can become a metropolitan...
Undergraduatecero - Dec 2, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Dec 5, 2012
|Admission Essay for AI of Miami
2 - Hi, "My long-term career objectives are definitely developing my skills through the training I will have gained throughout...
Undergraduatejberryjr - Nov 26, 2012 / DDDDISSSSSCO - Dec 5, 2012
|Speech and Language Pathology Master's Program Essay
Undergraduateashag323 - Nov 20, 2012 / dumi - Dec 4, 2012
|The redemption of Sydney Carton in A Tale of Two Cities
2 - While your overall argument about Carton's reasons for his sacrifice and the evidence you use to support it seem...
UndergraduateCarolineMoore - Dec 4, 2012 / Thaliak - Dec 4, 2012
|'My mom says I'm an overachiever.'; Georgetown supplement
2 - I love your opening and closing and your use of specific numbers of seconds. I read the feedback of...
UndergraduateSoccer13 - Nov 22, 2012 / cake_eater6 - Dec 4, 2012
|circumstances that may have had an impact on your academic performance. UWreadmission
Undergraduatebimongol - Dec 3, 2012 / bimongol - Dec 4, 2012
|My passion for animals would lead me to become a veterinarian - intended major
2 - "Throughout my life, my family has had a variety of pets from a toucan to a boa constrictor to...
Undergraduategiovannile07 - Nov 30, 2012 / CarolineMoore - Dec 4, 2012
|Why I chose Public Health and Biology - Johns Hopkins SUpplement
2 - "Public health is a major that allows one to understand the diseases that plague humans everyday on this earth...
Undergraduatemystictiger - Nov 23, 2012 / CarolineMoore - Dec 4, 2012
|Common Application-EC Short Answer; American regions math league competition
UndergraduateLarryHoover - Dec 4, 2012 / ah_zafari - Dec 4, 2012
|"Ignorance is Not Bliss" UT at Austin Topic B
2 - Here's my advice to you: Use sensory detail (sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch). Show don't tell. It adds...
Undergraduate503dannyk - Nov 26, 2012 / LarryHoover - Dec 4, 2012
|"Get me some water!" - Yale supplement (own topic)
8 - Hey, thanx for the comment, it was quite insightful. I'll implement the recommended corrections. As for the body,...
UndergraduatePhoebe Africa - Nov 2, 2012 / Phoebe Africa - Dec 4, 2012
|What about the less fortunate ones? SOP - Admission to SCAD
Undergraduateniakeith - Dec 2, 2012 / niakeith - Dec 4, 2012
|'going out to eat' - Common App essay about my job at a restaurant
Undergraduatepetemess95 - Nov 27, 2012 / petemess95 - Dec 4, 2012
|Piano by my Lonesome --Personal Essay
5 - Mm... I don't really know, since I am not a musician, just how important your message is. But I...
Undergraduateuhsikahtap - Dec 3, 2012 / linting2012 - Dec 4, 2012
|'The Editing Instinct' - Letter of Intent, USC Annenberg School of Communication
Undergraduatepurplepuma13 - Nov 25, 2012 / dumi - Dec 4, 2012
|Bilbo Baggins and Mr Frodo from the Lord of the Rings - UNC PROMPT
2 - Hi, I think you have some issues with this answer.... First, it does not answer the prompt well...
Undergraduatecheerdiva12 - Nov 26, 2012 / dumi - Dec 4, 2012
|Growing up with four overachieving siblings; UC Essay Prompt #1
2 - Hi, Mac) Your essay is nice, though the topic is quite common, so regarding your question whether you should...
Undergraduatempham94 - Nov 28, 2012 / KhanhZ - Dec 4, 2012
|Common App; The summer of a lifetime: 'the title flashed at me as I read the newspaper'
3 - Overall, your response really shows enthusiasm for your field. Just change these errors and you'll be fine....
Undergraduatejohnsonjazism - Dec 3, 2012 / icanfly1 - Dec 4, 2012
|I was never the best Wordsmith ;University of Richmond Supplement Essay
Undergraduatehssenior - Dec 1, 2012 / icanfly1 - Dec 4, 2012
|Williams College Supplement about Looking through a window - ideas needed
5 - Getting started with Williams supplement essay I just have one question. Does the environment you are looking out...
Undergraduateincognito_leo - Dec 19, 2008 / eagle134 - Dec 3, 2012
|"Choose an issue of importance to you" - UT Essay
2 - whoaa...
UndergraduateMputont - Nov 29, 2012 / mikiibee - Dec 3, 2012
|Why do you want to pursue an MS-MIS degree at Mays Business School? - Texas A & M:
2 - enoyed...
Undergraduatetina90 - Nov 21, 2012 / mikiibee - Dec 3, 2012
|I was confused about my own knowledge !
Undergraduatestiffbutt - Nov 29, 2012 / bimongol - Dec 3, 2012
|Various Short Essays, 'Growing Up Military' 'Fighting the Wheel' - Brown University
5 - Even though everyone say your first essay need to answer the question I believe that you are already answered...
Undergraduatebimzy - Nov 30, 2012 / linting2012 - Dec 3, 2012
|Playing Hockey in a different country - Common App
UndergraduateNewRo914 - Dec 3, 2012 / NewRo914 - Dec 3, 2012
|Swimming, the discipline that inspires me - PERSONAL STATEMENT
2 - I think the content itself is quite ok but there are some some sentences that are not clear enough....
Undergraduateveronikapilip - Nov 28, 2012 / Edna - Dec 3, 2012
|The challenges I faced being Hispanic; I fall under the most popular stereotypes
2 - This sentence is too long, therefore its clarity is greatly affected... Break it to few sentences so that...
Undergraduatenatalyt94 - Dec 1, 2012 / dumi - Dec 3, 2012
|I am one of the twin sisters; making friends is merely sociable with others superficially
3 - you have some grammatical errors : "each other become his or her main partner" should be "they become others...
UndergraduateReefs - Dec 3, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 3, 2012
|Elaborate on one extracurricular (Sound engineer)
3 - i think what you presented in the short answer is perfect. it really brings out your passion about sound...
UndergraduateAetos132 - Dec 3, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 3, 2012
|Dear Roommate - Hope you learned something about me!
5 - rewrote the first paragraph, I can see how it was confusing. Hopefully the second draft is easier to understand....
Undergraduateareallybadninja - Dec 2, 2012 / areallybadninja - Dec 3, 2012
|'first forced practice' - Deficient -- Common App Prompt #1
7 - Hello bimzy, It is much better! Your edition is really effective! 1) I am still not sure about when...
Undergraduatebimzy - Nov 26, 2012 / luying9682 - Dec 3, 2012
|I am a critical thinker pursuing a bioscience Major
2 - Applying this strategy, I narrowed down my diverse interests with more focus on science courses. Consequently, I...
Undergraduatetheariesc - Nov 30, 2012 / dumi - Dec 3, 2012
|Born in America with a Filipino heritage and culture!
Undergraduateenigma_girl - Nov 30, 2012 / dumi - Dec 3, 2012
|'Building is permanent' - UW Undergrad Essay - My Character-Defining Moment
Undergraduaterachellouisek - Nov 25, 2012 / Pahan - Dec 3, 2012
|Don't scream! Don't go to the playground! Don't play with toys! No! No! No!
Undergraduatekarengaytan - Nov 29, 2012 / dumi - Dec 3, 2012
|Dream Big and leave the Beach; Success
3 - Thanks a lot Dumi , I liked how ou re-phrase the fisrt sentence the third correction you made i...
UndergraduateMartinxo15 - Nov 29, 2012 / Martinxo15 - Dec 2, 2012
|Stop fearing the future; surrounded by doctors, lawyers and businessmen
4 - strong writing I think . perfect for a place like Stanford. but you should check the structure of sentences...
Undergraduatecarlosdave - Nov 29, 2012 / sarthakjain - Dec 2, 2012
|Why Swarthmore? Quirks. - Swarthmore College
3 - no way u'll fit that into 2000 characters. There's no way I can critique an essay that is going...
Undergraduatebimzy - Dec 2, 2012 / dwangus - Dec 2, 2012
|Life is like a Soccer Game - Common App; "They have worked harder than we did"
Undergraduaterezwan3 - Dec 2, 2012 / Jareer1979 - Dec 2, 2012
|Started off as an American, but ended as a British!
Undergraduatemdots - Nov 24, 2012 / mdots - Dec 2, 2012
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