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|COLLEGE UNDERGRADUATE ESSAY FOR UIC (UNIVERSITY OF ILLINOIS AT CHICAGO)
UndergraduateKENEEL - Sep 1, 2017 / KENEEL - Sep 1, 2017
|My unique feature. Being resistant to adversity. University of Virginia supplement Essay
Undergraduatezackyyy - Aug 31, 2017 / zackyyy - Sep 1, 2017
|Rubik's Cube. CommonApp essay on loving to solve problems
2 - NIhaal, there are two different concepts running in your essay. You are discussing (1) the concept of Java and...
UndergraduateTigerThePredator - Aug 31, 2017 / Holt - Sep 1, 2017
|Why Tulane? This University is the one for me. Essay Assistance
4 - Don't praise the university. Don't say they are esteemed; they know it.. Overall its fine. Why don't you start...
Undergraduatecollegegirl101 - Aug 30, 2017 / zackyyy - Aug 31, 2017
|Common app essay - Constructive Disaster? My transformation into a strong person.
3 - You've done a great job. It would be fantastic if you would remove the preliminary information and delve into...
Undergraduatedibs - Aug 31, 2017 / zackyyy - Aug 31, 2017
|Nigeria - the environment in which you were raised? Describe your family, home, neighborhood
2 - Braimoh, the reason that you are having a hard time developing the 500 word essay is because the essay...
UndergraduateLeila12 - Aug 27, 2017 / Holt - Aug 28, 2017
|Personal Statement on applying major transfer from Bsc (Hons) Property Management to Bsc in Nursing
3 - Thank you very much for your comment! I will try my best to shorten the paragraph, although there is...
Undergraduatealoha89i - Aug 27, 2017 / aloha89i - Aug 27, 2017
|My Academic Goals - Texas A&M Engineering Admission Essay
3 - Jazmine, when you choose a person who inspired your interest in Engineering, try to pick a more recent example...
Undergraduatejazvalencia - Aug 26, 2017 / Holt - Aug 27, 2017
|Back to my Roots - Common App: background, identity topic
3 - Bethany, for starters, you need to fix the title. It should read "Back to My Roots" because Ethopia is...
Undergraduatebethanysheshu - Aug 26, 2017 / Holt - Aug 27, 2017
|The Field of Computing - about your interest in NYU...
3 - Dibya, your essay needs to be specific about the interest that you developed for NYU. This interest needs to...
Undergraduatedibyaaaaax - Aug 26, 2017 / Holt - Aug 27, 2017
|'Teacher Crush' and guitar play - for The Common App, prompt 5.
4 - Petra, you have developed an interesting paper. It tells a very interesting story of self-discovery and overcoming obstacles at...
Undergraduatepds2027 - Aug 26, 2017 / Holt - Aug 26, 2017
|I am applying as a transfer student to A&M. SOP essay
2 - Michael, this is a very interesting personal statement. How I wish that you could use it as statement of...
Undergraduaterex123 - Aug 25, 2017 / Holt - Aug 25, 2017
|My goal: to become successful and to make a positive impact on the lives of others. Cornell Essay
2 - Charlene, the essay is interesting to read once you get over the fact that the establishing paragraph does not...
Undergraduatecharlenepeng1 - Aug 24, 2017 / Holt - Aug 24, 2017
|UNC Chapel Hill Prompt 1 - What is one thing that we don't know about you that you want for us to kn
5 - Sumedh, your introduction to your being an introvert is good. You have shown the good and the bad when...
Undergraduatesumthegoat - Aug 22, 2017 / Holt - Aug 23, 2017
|Common App Prompt 5 - Personal Growth through Spanish Dance
7 - @Hiddengrace does it have to be in essay format? can't it just be a story with added insight?...
Undergraduaterose2814 - Aug 14, 2017 / rose2814 - Aug 23, 2017
|"Loading... Loading... Loading..." Common App Personal Essay Prompt 4
UndergraduateWind0 - Aug 21, 2017 / Wind0 - Aug 22, 2017
|"Capture" - The Common App Essay (Topic of Choice)
4 - I like your casual tone, it's interesting and pleasing to read. I do see your personality reading your essay...
Undergraduateminhthuy - Aug 22, 2017 / jessiehihaho79 - Aug 22, 2017
|A Not Very Outstanding Story - The Common App - Topic 5
Undergraduateminhthuy - Aug 21, 2017 / minhthuy - Aug 21, 2017
|French House/Open-mindedness-- Wellesley Supplement Essay/ Wellesley 100 Essay
3 - Lin, this essay should be written in 2 paragraphs instead of one extremely long one. Also, you need to...
UndergraduateVictoriaSMITH - Aug 21, 2017 / Holt - Aug 21, 2017
|Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea - The Common App Essay
3 - Min, your story is nowhere near responding properly to the prompt you were given. You are offering an insight...
Undergraduateminhthuy - Aug 21, 2017 / Holt - Aug 21, 2017
|Common App 2018: Accomplishment, event or realization that sparked a period of personal growth
3 - Thank you so much for the advice! I will definitely take it into consideration as I make revisions....
UndergraduateSazy1022 - Aug 12, 2017 / Sazy1022 - Aug 13, 2017
|The Story of ANOTHER placement test (Essay for the Common Application)
2 - Peter, could you just summarize the story about the test? It became the focal point of the essay that...
Undergraduatepeterk - Aug 11, 2017 / Holt - Aug 11, 2017
|Education back ground and life experience
5 - @Holt This essay isn't complete, it should consist of 4 pages addressing the following: Educational background and life experiences...
Undergraduateboniface - Aug 9, 2017 / boniface - Aug 10, 2017
|NYU Tisch Dramatic Essay - "Hear My Notes"
6 - @Kiera9473, I see that you are working hard to make your story flow better, but I still think it's...
UndergraduateKiera9473 - Jul 27, 2017 / Hiddengrace - Aug 8, 2017
|"The Significant BANG" - Common Application Essay (Significant Experience)
3 - I have to agree with @Holt here. Also, I think you are skirting around the answer instead of answering...
Undergraduatedomsxcela - Aug 5, 2017 / Hiddengrace - Aug 8, 2017
|UFC Application Question on activities and Essay on my interest in UCF
Undergraduatejenalvarez - Aug 2, 2017 / jenalvarez - Aug 3, 2017
|UWC application - about an activity and its effect on own development
3 - Van, I know that this essay has a maximum character or word requirement, which is why you are worried....
UndergraduateScarlett1310 - Aug 1, 2017 / Holt - Aug 1, 2017
|How to call out my identity? Common Application prompt 1 - Personal Statement
6 - @Hiddengrace Katheryn, thank you so much for your suggestion! That's so helpful. I will try to think about...
UndergraduateJangGemini - Jul 29, 2017 / JangGemini - Aug 1, 2017
|'The laboratory is my second home' - University of Waterloo Engineering AIF
4 - @Holt Thankyou very much for all the suggestions. I will surely take them into consideration while editing...
UndergraduateSaadkhan124 - Aug 1, 2017 / Saadkhan124 - Aug 1, 2017
|Personal Statement; Tell us more about you and why you are considering VCU/ International Transfer
6 - Merged: Edited Personal statement Prompt "Tell us more about you and why you are considering vcu" I...
UndergraduateBabbie419 - Jul 2, 2017 / Babbie419 - Jul 30, 2017
|'My parents had the biggest impact on me'; How I was shaped into the person I am today
3 - Mars, this is a college application essay. So there is no need for such a formal restatement of the...
Undergraduatemarsbb22 - Jul 29, 2017 / Holt - Jul 29, 2017
|A person's success is defined by how he handles failures. ADMISSION ESSAY RECCOMENDATIONS!
Undergraduatenandoboi - Jul 26, 2017 / nandoboi - Jul 26, 2017
|Narrative essay help about my audition for Kpop
3 - Lavonna, unfortunately the topic that you chose, the one that you highlighted in black is not really a belief...
Undergraduatelavonnamark - Jul 17, 2017 / Holt - Jul 17, 2017
|USC - Describe your academic interests with first and second choice majors.
4 - @mark_o Make sure you answer the question. It asks you "how", not "what do you think about USC"? Also,...
Undergraduatemark_o - Jul 9, 2017 / d2ny - Jul 13, 2017
|UChicago: choose from one of our old prompts or create your own. Harvard: a topic of your choice.
2 - Ada, when you write this essay, it is best for you to develop your prompt statement first. What is...
Undergraduatedace - Jul 10, 2017 / Holt - Jul 11, 2017
|MIT Essay - Tell us about something you do simply for the pleasure of it. (100 words)
Undergraduateramanujam1729 - Jul 10, 2017 / ramanujam1729 - Jul 11, 2017
|Summer Research Opportunity at Johns Hopkins University
2 - Brayan, I like the background that you wrote regarding your interest and pursuit of Neuroscience training. It is clear...
Undergraduatebrayan1996 - Jul 10, 2017 / Holt - Jul 11, 2017
|Rubik's Cube similarities to the world - Common App Essay.
3 - Thank you for the observation@Holt, what if I use this essay to answer the new prompt 7 (topic of...
Undergraduatedace - Jul 10, 2017 / dace - Jul 10, 2017
|Why I Bake - Common App Prompt 1 (background, identity, interest, talent) Essay.
7 - I feel like the starting sentence of the third paragraph which is the "Most of the life-changing lessons are....beyond...
UndergraduateSlumar206 - Jul 7, 2017 / xhang24 - Jul 9, 2017
|UChicago and Harvard Topic of your choice essay.
2 - Mari, unfortunately, this essay will not work. It just a rehash of your baking essay. In fact, you redirected...
UndergraduateSlumar206 - Jul 8, 2017 / Holt - Jul 8, 2017
|30 year old returning to college, what broad perspective do I bring to the engineering classroom
4 - RSGOERTZ, I really admire your writing skills and I hope your essay hits the jackpot at the end of...
UndergraduateRSG335 - Jun 28, 2017 / okorobiadimma14 - Jun 29, 2017
|Phage Genomics Course Entrance Essay; discovery-based science interest - course participating
2 - Cassie, while this is a very interesting essay, it does not actually represent the required information to prove your...
Undergraduatecb8156 - Jun 27, 2017 / Holt - Jun 28, 2017
|"Why I have chosen invasive cardiovascular technology"
4 - Gina, the essay has improved a little. However, it is still scattered in the manner that it discusses the...
Undergraduateggarcia18 - Jun 24, 2017 / Holt - Jun 26, 2017
|Interest in a Summer Research Program at Duke University
2 - Brayan, please note that contributors are limited to only one free advice per thread now. The advice that I...
Undergraduatebrayan1996 - Jun 22, 2017 / Holt - Jun 23, 2017
|Ideas presented in the topic: Career goals and how to accomplish them
Undergraduatebrayan1996 - Jun 19, 2017 / brayan1996 - Jun 20, 2017
|SCAD Statement of Purpose for B.F.A. Visual Effects
4 - Hi Christina, I agree with Holt. You are gonna have to start all over again. This is a statement...
UndergraduateAspiringArtist88 - Jun 17, 2017 / chizy7 - Jun 20, 2017
|"The Chemistry of Baking" -Common App Prompt #5
4 - @srubin18 Your work is quite interesting and very captivating. Great job. However, as @Holt rightly pointed out, you might...
Undergraduatesrubin18 - Jun 18, 2017 / Hidy - Jun 18, 2017
|"I've never had a home" Transfer student's NYU supplement
3 - @Holt Thanks for your reply. I definitely get what you are saying and I'll be sure to try and...
Undergraduatejp97 - Jun 16, 2017 / jp97 - Jun 16, 2017
|Giving back to society and making a difference. Personal statement for university scholarship!
5 - it's better not to use contraction for academic writing, the contraction shows that this is an informal writing. ...
UndergraduateJasmine855 - Jun 14, 2017 / klarashati - Jun 15, 2017
|A convert to Mormonism interested in autism research at Caltech? That's me. (undergrad app essays)
UndergraduateStudyAndFaith - Jun 14, 2017 / Holt - Jun 15, 2017
|Immigrated to United States
3 - @felixb6 many of them became become heavily built while the others ... this sentence is hard to understand, but...
Undergraduatefelixb6 - Jun 2, 2017 / maruko chan - Jun 6, 2017
|"Tell us about an achievement or ability not reflected in this application."
2 - Patrick, this essay covers more of the requirements for an obstacle you had to overcome instead of an achievement...
Undergraduatepoody11 - May 17, 2017 / Holt - May 18, 2017
|UC Davis Waitlist Essay - my mendeavors to study the Social Sciences
2 - Syrah, though this essay is well thought out, it doesn't fully represent the method by which your past and...
Undergraduatesyrahnavid - May 13, 2017 / Holt - May 14, 2017
|Different-an "other" which revealed to you your sense of self and your relationship to humanity
2 - Claudia, you have too many things going on in this essay. I realize that this trip left an impact...
Undergraduateclauqmanso - May 12, 2017 / Holt - May 12, 2017
|Letter of Motivation for Bachelor's degree Mechanical Engineering
2 - Moataz, I don't really see a career motive for your interest in pursuing a masters degree in Mechanical Engineering....
UndergraduateArnosyn - May 1, 2017 / Holt - May 2, 2017
|Self Introduction Essay for Exchange Program in Ajou University
3 - REVISED PAPER My friends always described me as a person with high curiosity of anything. I always wanted...
Undergraduateurufaru - Apr 29, 2017 / urufaru - Apr 30, 2017
|Including mental and autoimmune illnesses, stress, and psychological abuse, etc in Common App essay?
3 - @Holt Thank you. I want to use the QuestBridge application this fall to re-apply to many of them and...
UndergraduateRobinsonFaithA - Apr 23, 2017 / RobinsonFaithA - Apr 23, 2017
|UT Transfer Essay "A": How can I improve the quality of my personal statement?
3 - Thank you Holt. You answered the burning question most decisively. The cited material is actually from my Recon platoon...
Undergraduatereconjitsu - Apr 18, 2017 / reconjitsu - Apr 19, 2017
|Why do you want to attend one of the military service academies?
2 - Isabel, I have a tip for you. Try to relate your desire to help amputees with the experience on...
UndergraduateIzRivera - Apr 18, 2017 / Holt - Apr 19, 2017
|I choose to further my education in Canada high quality education and security
4 - Nguyen, just summarize your educational background and experience in one paragraph. This essay will be presented to the visa...
Undergraduatethanhhien271 - Apr 18, 2017 / Holt - Apr 19, 2017
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