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|"Never stop exploring" Villanova Supplement 2013
2 - "I think we're lost." Those are never comforting words to hear.---Great opening! At camp, the leaders ease you...
Undergraduatelaurenmit - Oct 20, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 9, 2012
|'Columbia Area Career Center' - Nursing Essay
2 - It is a beautiful thing to use your knowledge and capability to perform such a powerful role in a...
UndergraduateJennybelle - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 9, 2012
|SCAD - Statement of Purpose - Illustration Major (does it fit requirements?)
2 - Ability has the potential to be wasted by those without inspiration, and that is something I desire to change.---This...
Undergraduateabbychristine - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 9, 2012
|'Senior student's pressure' - medicine, radiotherapy Essay applying to universities
2 - Myself, I have nothing more than my hard works and enthusiasm towards health care, and a wish of your...
Undergraduatewide - Oct 19, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 9, 2012
|'God on my side' - COMMON APP ESSAY FOR CALVIN COLLEGE
2 - Firstly, the essay seems rather short. Is there a word limit? Nevertheless, i think you should change "number one...
Undergraduatesamkumah - Oct 28, 2012 / ranimeks - Nov 9, 2012
|'Santoor music' - Stanford roommate short essay
Undergraduateysysysys - Nov 7, 2012 / dumi - Nov 9, 2012
|'My Chinglish sentences' - Common Application Main Essay
2 - Hi Totoro Great essay! Yet I think you may add more details in the third paragraph (e.g. what...
UndergraduateTotoro - Nov 8, 2012 / luying9682 - Nov 9, 2012
|'losing my first election' - 2nd UC PROMPT
UndergraduateHiImAsian - Nov 8, 2012 / dumi - Nov 9, 2012
|'Family in need of help in Tijuana, Mexico' - where you come from UC Essay
NEW - Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how...
UndergraduateHelpsMyPaper - Nov 9, 2012 / — -
|UC personal statement: the Appetite behind my Aspirations
Undergraduateaadnub - Oct 20, 2012 / Totoro - Nov 8, 2012
|UC: Four years ago, I left my country to go to the U.S for a better education
3 - Dear phuc7530, I experienced the exact same thing as you did, just that I came to San Diego around...
Undergraduatephuc7530 - Nov 8, 2012 / Totoro - Nov 8, 2012
|'Mu Alpha Theta' Short Response Common Application
2 - Last year after elected as President, I took the initiative to make substantial changes to the society. You...
UndergraduateBrightwolf - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 8, 2012
|My painting performance - applying to college
2 - My desire to gain knowledge was, ---No comma here---of course, ---or here.-- the priority, but extracurricular classes fascinated me...
Undergraduateloreal - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 8, 2012
|UVA Essay: Discuss something you secretly like but pretend not to, or vice versa.
2 - ... the baby-skin-smooth texture and warmth, the whispering of the steam, and last but not least, the explosion of...
Undergraduateredskinsman95 - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 8, 2012
|'Fantastic education and new stunning element' - UCF APPLICATION
Undergraduatecnembach - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 8, 2012
|UIUC essay "THE DREAM LIVES ON" - tell us something about yourself
UndergraduateAMB994 - Oct 20, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 8, 2012
|'Younger brother in Czech Rep / Academic and social life' - UCF Admission Essay
2 - Throughout my academic career, there have been many bumps in the road for me, both within my personal life...
Undergraduatekmccoy17 - Oct 28, 2012 / EF_Susan - Nov 8, 2012
|'College hit me like a ton of bricks' - UT Austin Transfer (Personal Statement)
3 - Damn man... i experienced nearly the same as yours. College really hit me like a ton of bricks!...
UndergraduateJoshuaPerez - Sep 29, 2012 / fhrn - Nov 8, 2012
|"yes, ma'am" / "physics magazine" - MIT answers- pleasure and challenge
Undergraduatefireflies_dance - Nov 8, 2012 / fireflies_dance - Nov 8, 2012
|My Community- "Secrety Society of Love and Joy" Umich supplement
2 - Your secret society is the most amazing thing I have ever heard!! I wish my school had that. Your...
Undergraduateallms - Oct 19, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 8, 2012
|UMD Create Your Own Topic-How has your environment affected the way you have grown?
Undergraduatedma_245z - Oct 21, 2012 / manjit809 - Nov 8, 2012
|'More Than Just Restoring a Car' - Common App Own Topic Admission
Undergraduatemattn1 - Oct 20, 2012 / manjit809 - Nov 8, 2012
|'Photography is a part of my life' - Art Institue essay
NEW - Will i just finished this essay. It is full of grammer errors i just can not tell where due...
UndergraduateDerryca - Nov 7, 2012 / — -
|'Influential soccer and teammates' - extracurricular activities or work experience
NEW - On the growing road of my life, soccer have a very important influence to me. Not only bring me...
Undergraduatezhixiangdai - Nov 7, 2012 / — -
|'Parents born and raised in Argentina' - Rutgers University Diversity Essay
3 - Hey great information! I am not to great with the grammar problems, but I didn't see any spelling mistakes...
Undergraduatesolawnjay - Oct 22, 2012 / ruprecht10 - Nov 7, 2012
|(Trojan, Poetry, Identity, Ambicious, God-mother, Energy) - 2012 NCSSM
Undergraduatespoiledgemini16 - Oct 26, 2012 / ruprecht10 - Nov 7, 2012
|'Community college - ups and downs' - temple educational personal statment
2 - The main issues here are grammar and punctuation. However, there is much rambling that can be significantly reduced in...
Undergraduatexrachel24 - Oct 18, 2012 / Sheri_Editor - Nov 7, 2012
|'boarding school hostel / creative designer' - personal Statement
2 - The message in your essay is clear; however, the wording is too jumbled in many areas. There are a...
UndergraduateWonhee - Oct 18, 2012 / Sheri_Editor - Nov 7, 2012
|'Rock-n-Roll / Smith college / Women's World 9-Ball' - short answers to revise
2 - My English isn't perfect so I can only find some very obvious mistakes. Here are some for the small...
Undergraduatelucy123 - Nov 7, 2012 / linting2012 - Nov 7, 2012
|Commonapp Writing about leadership - 'Amidst the applause'
5 - I think you need to work on the metaphors first. How do they actually relate to your story? In...
Undergraduatebeachbeers - Oct 16, 2012 / toughbeef - Nov 7, 2012
|Common App essay. 'Camp Sunshine, a camp for mentally challenged children'
Undergraduatemrorange515 - Nov 7, 2012 / — -
|Common App essay - my childhood visit to the Discovery Museum.
2 - Nicely written essay, quite passionate. I can't tell you how good it is though, since you didn't write which...
Undergraduatecombo32 - Oct 18, 2012 / ijiboom - Nov 7, 2012
|'inherently timeless dream' - UCHICAGO SUPPLEMENT
2 - I think the title "The American Dream" would be more appropriate. I don't see how this essay can fall...
Undergraduateabhinavp95 - Oct 17, 2012 / mashal - Nov 7, 2012
|'orphanage for HIV positive children' - Extracurricular short essay for Common App
3 - Thank you so much for your input! Could you clarify what you mean by, "allocate the last two sentences...
Undergraduateqasderwdw - Nov 7, 2012 / qasderwdw - Nov 7, 2012
|'out of ramblings' - Letter To Roomate supplement... w/ a wacky twist...
6 - I see your point, your essay will certainly freshen up the admission officers. I really hope you get in...
UndergraduateMrMaro - Nov 6, 2012 / mashal - Nov 7, 2012
|"Learning from others"-Rutgers admissions essay
6 - Would anyone else like to chime in? I want to know what overall impression the reader gets from this...
UndergraduateMaryMary - Nov 5, 2012 / MaryMary - Nov 6, 2012
|"A pair of recycling hands" Tulane Personal Statement Essay
Undergraduateviridianforest - Nov 6, 2012 / viridianforest - Nov 6, 2012
|'teach me Japanese' - CommonApp: 500 word Essay (Evaluate a experience)
UndergraduateLina101 - Oct 29, 2012 / linting2012 - Nov 6, 2012
|'Band Director' - UT AUSTIN- Person of Importance
Undergraduaterondevious - Nov 5, 2012 / rondevious - Nov 6, 2012
|'a hole of discouragement' - Purdue Application (How To Overcome)
UndergraduatePGates - Oct 29, 2012 / shmegg - Nov 6, 2012
|'Wrestling and athletics' - College Essay - Issue of importance to you
Undergraduatehoonmasta - Oct 15, 2012 / rondevious - Nov 6, 2012
|What sculpture is to a block of marble, Education is to a human soul
2 - Hi :) Here are just some ideas I think will improve your essay I don't see any grammatical errors...
Undergraduatemeghabelli - Oct 15, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 6, 2012
|"The Vietnamese Language", my common App essay
UndergraduateJai911 - Nov 6, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 6, 2012
|'Cultural Explorer' - common app essay; describe an experience
Undergraduateqwertybob900 - Oct 15, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 6, 2012
|'I want to be a role model' - Rutgers College Admin Essay
2 - Hello! I think you have some good ideas here, but don't restate the question in the words the prompt...
Undergraduateaarredondo9495 - Nov 6, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 6, 2012
|Lao-Tzu and Machiavelli - The Perfect Leader
2 - I think you're doing really well and have some good ideas. I would stay away from injecting your own...
Undergraduaterachael521 - Nov 6, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 6, 2012
|'Ashley - pain and misfortune' - is this a good essay for this topic
2 - I think this a really well-written and heart-warming essay, but you need to spend more time explaining the impact...
Undergraduatealexisdanielle - Nov 6, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 6, 2012
|Common App Essay (topic of choice: influence of basketball game)
Undergraduateuyaq23 - Nov 4, 2012 / dudeman - Nov 6, 2012
|'old family albums' - risk, experience Common Application
Undergraduateneedcollegenow - Nov 3, 2012 / dudeman - Nov 6, 2012
|George Washington Honors College Essay/7-year BA MD program.
Undergraduatemystictiger - Nov 6, 2012 / ah_zafari - Nov 6, 2012
|I'm all set to commence my day with God! ; Calvin College -Christian learning Env
2 - I feel that although you have answered the prompt, you tend to sound a bit proud. Maybe instead of...
UndergraduateSaintlarrys - Oct 18, 2012 / qasderwdw - Nov 6, 2012
|Williams Supplement Essay, 20 words over 300 word limit, need help in shortening
Undergraduateguylord1234 - Nov 5, 2012 / lucy123 - Nov 6, 2012
|Notre Dame What do you never believe &difference between intelligence and wisdom
4 - Jennyflower81's editing removes the confusion from your first response. I really like how you've used a very simple example...
Undergraduatelucy123 - Oct 27, 2012 / mashal - Nov 6, 2012
|'School and disgruntled individuals' - UT Austin- Issue of Importance
Undergraduatealikidwai - Oct 30, 2012 / alikidwai - Nov 6, 2012
|'track was for fun' - extraciricular essay
2 - xpmichy Usain Bolt (capital B) spend my after-school time not on the computer, but outside on the...
Undergraduatexpmichy - Nov 4, 2012 / sailinalbion - Nov 6, 2012
|'Not all universities are the same / Representing team and city' - UCF admissions
3 - Thank you so much! And I understand what you mean by the 'fake' sentence. Thank you for the help...
Undergraduatebakerk95 - Nov 4, 2012 / bakerk95 - Nov 6, 2012
|"Tiger Mother" - Common app essay - How to measure success?
Undergraduatechristies - Nov 5, 2012 / polsestart - Nov 6, 2012
|'Loving the research facilities' - Why is Duke Trinity School a good match for you?
2 - You seem really pretentious when you state, "I have always been dedicated to my work, or I am...
UndergraduateMirandaPanda - Oct 30, 2012 / SpicyCurryMan - Nov 5, 2012
|'specializing in different realms' -Stanford paper - Intellectual Vitality
Undergraduateschlotti - Oct 14, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|CommonApp Essay on Alexander the Great's influence
Undergraduatemontysire - Nov 4, 2012 / linting2012 - Nov 5, 2012
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