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|'College hit me like a ton of bricks' - UT Austin Transfer (Personal Statement)
3 - Damn man... i experienced nearly the same as yours. College really hit me like a ton of bricks!...
UndergraduateJoshuaPerez - Sep 29, 2012 / fhrn - Nov 8, 2012
|"yes, ma'am" / "physics magazine" - MIT answers- pleasure and challenge
Undergraduatefireflies_dance - Nov 8, 2012 / fireflies_dance - Nov 8, 2012
|My Community- "Secrety Society of Love and Joy" Umich supplement
2 - Your secret society is the most amazing thing I have ever heard!! I wish my school had that. Your...
Undergraduateallms - Oct 19, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 8, 2012
|UMD Create Your Own Topic-How has your environment affected the way you have grown?
Undergraduatedma_245z - Oct 21, 2012 / manjit809 - Nov 8, 2012
|'More Than Just Restoring a Car' - Common App Own Topic Admission
Undergraduatemattn1 - Oct 20, 2012 / manjit809 - Nov 8, 2012
|'Photography is a part of my life' - Art Institue essay
NEW - Will i just finished this essay. It is full of grammer errors i just can not tell where due...
UndergraduateDerryca - Nov 7, 2012 / — -
|'Influential soccer and teammates' - extracurricular activities or work experience
NEW - On the growing road of my life, soccer have a very important influence to me. Not only bring me...
Undergraduatezhixiangdai - Nov 7, 2012 / — -
|'Parents born and raised in Argentina' - Rutgers University Diversity Essay
3 - Hey great information! I am not to great with the grammar problems, but I didn't see any spelling mistakes...
Undergraduatesolawnjay - Oct 22, 2012 / ruprecht10 - Nov 7, 2012
|(Trojan, Poetry, Identity, Ambicious, God-mother, Energy) - 2012 NCSSM
Undergraduatespoiledgemini16 - Oct 26, 2012 / ruprecht10 - Nov 7, 2012
|'Community college - ups and downs' - temple educational personal statment
2 - The main issues here are grammar and punctuation. However, there is much rambling that can be significantly reduced in...
Undergraduatexrachel24 - Oct 18, 2012 / Sheri_Editor - Nov 7, 2012
|'boarding school hostel / creative designer' - personal Statement
2 - The message in your essay is clear; however, the wording is too jumbled in many areas. There are a...
UndergraduateWonhee - Oct 18, 2012 / Sheri_Editor - Nov 7, 2012
|'Rock-n-Roll / Smith college / Women's World 9-Ball' - short answers to revise
2 - My English isn't perfect so I can only find some very obvious mistakes. Here are some for the small...
Undergraduatelucy123 - Nov 7, 2012 / linting2012 - Nov 7, 2012
|Commonapp Writing about leadership - 'Amidst the applause'
5 - I think you need to work on the metaphors first. How do they actually relate to your story? In...
Undergraduatebeachbeers - Oct 16, 2012 / toughbeef - Nov 7, 2012
|Common App essay. 'Camp Sunshine, a camp for mentally challenged children'
Undergraduatemrorange515 - Nov 7, 2012 / — -
|Common App essay - my childhood visit to the Discovery Museum.
2 - Nicely written essay, quite passionate. I can't tell you how good it is though, since you didn't write which...
Undergraduatecombo32 - Oct 18, 2012 / ijiboom - Nov 7, 2012
|'inherently timeless dream' - UCHICAGO SUPPLEMENT
2 - I think the title "The American Dream" would be more appropriate. I don't see how this essay can fall...
Undergraduateabhinavp95 - Oct 17, 2012 / mashal - Nov 7, 2012
|'orphanage for HIV positive children' - Extracurricular short essay for Common App
3 - Thank you so much for your input! Could you clarify what you mean by, "allocate the last two sentences...
Undergraduateqasderwdw - Nov 7, 2012 / qasderwdw - Nov 7, 2012
|'out of ramblings' - Letter To Roomate supplement... w/ a wacky twist...
6 - I see your point, your essay will certainly freshen up the admission officers. I really hope you get in...
UndergraduateMrMaro - Nov 6, 2012 / mashal - Nov 7, 2012
|"Learning from others"-Rutgers admissions essay
6 - Would anyone else like to chime in? I want to know what overall impression the reader gets from this...
UndergraduateMaryMary - Nov 5, 2012 / MaryMary - Nov 6, 2012
|"A pair of recycling hands" Tulane Personal Statement Essay
Undergraduateviridianforest - Nov 6, 2012 / viridianforest - Nov 6, 2012
|'teach me Japanese' - CommonApp: 500 word Essay (Evaluate a experience)
UndergraduateLina101 - Oct 29, 2012 / linting2012 - Nov 6, 2012
|'Band Director' - UT AUSTIN- Person of Importance
Undergraduaterondevious - Nov 5, 2012 / rondevious - Nov 6, 2012
|'a hole of discouragement' - Purdue Application (How To Overcome)
UndergraduatePGates - Oct 29, 2012 / shmegg - Nov 6, 2012
|'Wrestling and athletics' - College Essay - Issue of importance to you
Undergraduatehoonmasta - Oct 15, 2012 / rondevious - Nov 6, 2012
|What sculpture is to a block of marble, Education is to a human soul
2 - Hi :) Here are just some ideas I think will improve your essay I don't see any grammatical errors...
Undergraduatemeghabelli - Oct 15, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 6, 2012
|"The Vietnamese Language", my common App essay
UndergraduateJai911 - Nov 6, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 6, 2012
|'Cultural Explorer' - common app essay; describe an experience
Undergraduateqwertybob900 - Oct 15, 2012 / ZKhan1227 - Nov 6, 2012
|'I want to be a role model' - Rutgers College Admin Essay
2 - Hello! I think you have some good ideas here, but don't restate the question in the words the prompt...
Undergraduateaarredondo9495 - Nov 6, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 6, 2012
|Lao-Tzu and Machiavelli - The Perfect Leader
2 - I think you're doing really well and have some good ideas. I would stay away from injecting your own...
Undergraduaterachael521 - Nov 6, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 6, 2012
|'Ashley - pain and misfortune' - is this a good essay for this topic
2 - I think this a really well-written and heart-warming essay, but you need to spend more time explaining the impact...
Undergraduatealexisdanielle - Nov 6, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 6, 2012
|Common App Essay (topic of choice: influence of basketball game)
Undergraduateuyaq23 - Nov 4, 2012 / dudeman - Nov 6, 2012
|'old family albums' - risk, experience Common Application
Undergraduateneedcollegenow - Nov 3, 2012 / dudeman - Nov 6, 2012
|George Washington Honors College Essay/7-year BA MD program.
Undergraduatemystictiger - Nov 6, 2012 / ah_zafari - Nov 6, 2012
|I'm all set to commence my day with God! ; Calvin College -Christian learning Env
2 - I feel that although you have answered the prompt, you tend to sound a bit proud. Maybe instead of...
UndergraduateSaintlarrys - Oct 18, 2012 / qasderwdw - Nov 6, 2012
|Williams Supplement Essay, 20 words over 300 word limit, need help in shortening
Undergraduateguylord1234 - Nov 5, 2012 / lucy123 - Nov 6, 2012
|Notre Dame What do you never believe &difference between intelligence and wisdom
4 - Jennyflower81's editing removes the confusion from your first response. I really like how you've used a very simple example...
Undergraduatelucy123 - Oct 27, 2012 / mashal - Nov 6, 2012
|'School and disgruntled individuals' - UT Austin- Issue of Importance
Undergraduatealikidwai - Oct 30, 2012 / alikidwai - Nov 6, 2012
|'track was for fun' - extraciricular essay
2 - xpmichy Usain Bolt (capital B) spend my after-school time not on the computer, but outside on the...
Undergraduatexpmichy - Nov 4, 2012 / sailinalbion - Nov 6, 2012
|'Not all universities are the same / Representing team and city' - UCF admissions
3 - Thank you so much! And I understand what you mean by the 'fake' sentence. Thank you for the help...
Undergraduatebakerk95 - Nov 4, 2012 / bakerk95 - Nov 6, 2012
|"Tiger Mother" - Common app essay - How to measure success?
Undergraduatechristies - Nov 5, 2012 / polsestart - Nov 6, 2012
|'Loving the research facilities' - Why is Duke Trinity School a good match for you?
2 - You seem really pretentious when you state, "I have always been dedicated to my work, or I am...
UndergraduateMirandaPanda - Oct 30, 2012 / SpicyCurryMan - Nov 5, 2012
|'specializing in different realms' -Stanford paper - Intellectual Vitality
Undergraduateschlotti - Oct 14, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|CommonApp Essay on Alexander the Great's influence
Undergraduatemontysire - Nov 4, 2012 / linting2012 - Nov 5, 2012
|FSU - great model for universities all over the country; "Leadership"
2 - Hello! Remember, the point of this essay is for the admissions committee to get to know you, so I...
Undergraduatecwarner2013 - Oct 13, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|Since my early teens, I have had a fascination with understanding how certain things work - A&M
UndergraduateThink_Maroon - Oct 9, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|UCF-Unique Qualities Essay for my Application
2 - Hello! I think you have some great ideas here, but the college essay needs to be less formal! The...
Undergraduatedollasb - Oct 11, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|'doctor at evaluations, treatments and training' - Physical Therapy Application Essay
2 - I love the story at the beginning! It really provides a personal connection. However, I'm not sure about "ripe...
Undergraduatenodeal - Oct 10, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|'I close one eye' - Case Western Reserve University Pre-Professionals Scholars
2 - "I relived this feeling of mind-blowing -This is awkward. Reword the mind-blowing part. when I set a piece of...
Undergraduatelklklk124 - Nov 4, 2012 / Premed0 - Nov 5, 2012
|'Virtual DJ Home' Rules that apply to the community Intro
2 - I like this a lot, and find it very evocative. However, I don't think "dutiful" is the best word...
Undergraduatedd9679 - Oct 10, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|Physical Therapy: teach others how to support themselves
3 - Hello! Since your profile mentions Queens, I would recommend using Google Maps to find physical therapy centers nearby. One...
Undergraduatebeltramok - Aug 6, 2011 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|Best For Me As A Lourdesian
Undergraduatedelrosariocarl - Oct 8, 2012 / Leah_Writer - Nov 5, 2012
|"My Other Half" Personal Statement on cultural identity
2 - Hi :) This essay is fantastic, you write very well. I cannot find any errors or problems with this...
Undergraduateawolfatthedoor - Nov 1, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Nov 5, 2012
|James A. Michener quote - The introduction of Texas A&M university in Qatar's essay
Undergraduateteskyeh - Nov 1, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Nov 5, 2012
|What is your opinion about condemnation? (very short essay)
2 - Personally speaking, condemnation doesn't make any accomplishment. From my point of view, condemnation does not accomplish anything. For...
Undergraduatesomemela - Nov 5, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Nov 5, 2012
|Yale Supplemental Essay - On Media and Social Impressions
2 - This is a very interesting topic. On the subject of pop culture, you have chosen a very broad spectrum...
Undergraduatehumoresques - Nov 5, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Nov 5, 2012
|'Earth Service Corps' - Common App ~ Activity Essay
2 - I got involved in the composting program in my high school during my sophomore year when I discovered that...
Undergraduateblquandt - Nov 5, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Nov 5, 2012
|Common App Essay (Fight or Flight) Topic of choice
4 - It seems as if this essay is abou fight or flight, not about you. You don't begin talking about...
UndergraduateHC2013 - Oct 31, 2012 / Spencedawg - Nov 5, 2012
|Common App. Personal Essay: 'Brookline Academy of Dance' - meaningful challenge
2 - Good description of your teaching dance! Are you applying to a dance college or what other subject? You can...
Undergraduateglady91 - Oct 28, 2012 / linmark - Nov 5, 2012
|Moving Troubles (commonapp personal essay)
Undergraduateesthershin - Oct 28, 2012 / HC2013 - Nov 5, 2012
|People Who Have Left a Mark in My Life. My teachers.
3 - I totally agree with linmark. You would probably want to chose a fictional or historical character, a teacher and...
Undergraduatemmham1 - Oct 31, 2012 / montysire - Nov 5, 2012
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