|Undergraduate [25,738] - page 180 of 429|
|'I discuss politics with my friends' - What are you passionate about?
2 - Overall great essay... While watching the T.V. my parents get the call. Your parents got the call not...
Undergraduateinternational1 - Jan 7, 2012 / Tanici1401 - Jan 7, 2012
|'advancing and enhancing technology / Bangladesh' - Gates Essay: Subject Excelled
5 - I edited your essay on microsoft word. I'm new to this forum and I am not familiar with editing...
Undergraduaterifatmursalin - Jan 7, 2012 / Nana12 - Jan 7, 2012
|'being Vietnamese' - University of Wisconsin: How will you enrich our community?
Undergraduatebestcrayons911 - Jan 7, 2012 / bestcrayons911 - Jan 7, 2012
|'I have a lot of interesting and unique things' - unique about me
Undergraduatemsw1225 - Jan 7, 2012 / bestcrayons911 - Jan 7, 2012
|'suicide among lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender' - treated unfairly
4 - Thanks (;...
UndergraduateNana12 - Jan 7, 2012 / Nana12 - Jan 7, 2012
|'member of my family's businesse' - FOR COLLEGE
2 - Good effort, but adding the prompt would make it easier to provide more valuable feedback. Please look at my...
Undergraduateterexberd - Jan 7, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 7, 2012
|'Power and Privilege' - ethics and values assessment
2 - Amazing Work ! I am a high school student who wants to pursue Electrical or mechanical engineering at Purdue...
Undergraduateantigone - Jan 7, 2012 / soufianelaouad - Jan 7, 2012
|'This summer strengthened family relationships' - Princeton
3 - Amazing Work ! I am a high school student who wants to pursue Electrical or mechanical engineering at Purdue...
Undergraduateangelserenite - Jan 1, 2012 / soufianelaouad - Jan 7, 2012
|'The finite sources of energy' - Why Engineering and why Cornell
13 - Amazing Work ! I am a high school student who wants to pursue Electrical or mechanical engineering at Purdue...
Undergraduatematthewmuliadi - Dec 30, 2011 / soufianelaouad - Jan 7, 2012
|'Engineering, My Passion' - CORNELL ENGINEERING
3 - Amazing Work ! I am a high school student who wants to pursue Electrical or mechanical engineering at Purdue...
UndergraduateSands872971 - Jan 2, 2012 / soufianelaouad - Jan 7, 2012
|'the Grand Prix at Prospect Park' - extracurricular activity
4 - Sum up all the ways this activity has shaped the individual you are today. I like the way you...
Undergraduatesilentspring - Jan 7, 2012 / Nana12 - Jan 7, 2012
|'this nauseating stench of fetid urine' - Transfer Essay
Undergraduatecollyguy - Jan 7, 2012 / divvya23 - Jan 7, 2012
|"First Kiss" Why OSU? I could comment on how awe-inspiring Elwood Gordon Gee is
2 - This is an awesome introduction. It gives them similes and something to visualize. However, in the body of your...
Undergraduateasburyceline - Jan 7, 2012 / Nana12 - Jan 7, 2012
|'I indulge in silence' - my commapp
10 - i agree with nana12, its a creative essay and its really good but you don't want to be poetic...
Undergraduatejadore_lamode68 - Jan 5, 2012 / asburyceline - Jan 7, 2012
|'a child of two Indian parents' - RICE PERSPECTIVES ESSAY
4 - Thanks for your help, Miguel and Mureille, I was trying to distinguish myself from largest group in America...
Undergraduatelakerfanj - Jan 5, 2012 / lakerfanj - Jan 7, 2012
|'Cycling' - Extracurricular activity
3 - I could not agree more ... I think you should mention how cycling makes you as an individual, and...
Undergraduatejult94 - Jan 6, 2012 / valsaviera - Jan 7, 2012
|'Santa Claus, Classmates, Monitor, Music) - Describe yourself - Creative essay
2 - Your essays are fine, but I don't really understand what you mean by the "Monitor". Any feedback on my...
UndergraduateBTDTXXDY - Jan 6, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 7, 2012
|(Future Farmer of America / Military training) - Transfer
3 - Thank you!...
Undergraduateapplenjuice - Jan 5, 2012 / applenjuice - Jan 6, 2012
|'Remembered Event Essay' (English Comp II)
2 - Why do you have to feel ashamed of what you behaved earlier? I don't think it's really critical....
Undergraduatestacysss - Jan 5, 2012 / BTDTXXDY - Jan 6, 2012
|'raised in a Christian family' - Pepperdine Prompt
2 - Instead of "I have been raised in a Christian family throughout my life" try I have been raised by...
Undergraduatecastro17 - Jan 6, 2012 / kenben12 - Jan 6, 2012
|'Knowledge kept me under the stars' - BEREA ESSAY
4 - I agree with mylo. This is a really good start of your essay. Your show them your constant curiosity...
Undergraduatejaneth - Jan 6, 2012 / jult94 - Jan 6, 2012
|Quiet. To much of my family I am "the good one". I am not rebellious; I am studious, and responsible
Undergraduatecollegegurl94 - Jan 4, 2012 / ZhoeK - Jan 6, 2012
|'Soccer - a huge part of my life' - common app essay
Undergraduatezanzy - Jan 5, 2012 / zanzy - Jan 6, 2012
|'My ambition was evident' - Commonapp Transfer Essay
UndergraduateVinny_Pooh - Jan 5, 2012 / frazzledbrain - Jan 6, 2012
|'excel in electrical and electronic engineering program' - Transfer essay
3 - thx for helping.. yes english is not my native language but i will try to improve the structure of...
Undergraduateunknown - Jan 4, 2012 / unknown - Jan 6, 2012
|'the international communication' - Georgetown Related
3 - Thank you for your suggestions! but I still cannot exactly understand your point... I don't know how to write...
UndergraduateTinalove1412 - Jan 6, 2012 / Tinalove1412 - Jan 6, 2012
|"I'm a cupcake" - Emerson supplement
UndergraduateCleopatra - Jan 5, 2012 / ItsokaytoGaga - Jan 6, 2012
|'a Gay-Straight Alliance' - Extracurricular Activities
3 - i didn't really ctch on on how you were mistaken,but I think if you expanded on the fact that...
Undergraduatemylo_zyloto - Jan 5, 2012 / janeth - Jan 6, 2012
|'Solving problems with code' - finding a ending and basic editing
Undergraduateajtred - Jan 5, 2012 / Tinalove1412 - Jan 6, 2012
|'becoming a Hokie is my first choice' - Virgnia
5 - Dear Peter Park I just want to mention that it is better to avoid contraction in academic and formal...
UndergraduateArizonaT - Jan 5, 2012 / stellastella - Jan 6, 2012
|'to the principal's office' - UNC essay
5 - Grammatically, the only mistake that stood out to me was putting periods after quotations. Periods always go on the...
Undergraduateomo5031 - Jan 5, 2012 / mylo_zyloto - Jan 5, 2012
|'I boldly stood up for my brother' - pepperdine essay
2 - Grammar mistakes I noticed/Things I would change: -should be "became an atheist" instead of "turned to an atheist."...
Undergraduatepjw7109 - Jan 5, 2012 / mylo_zyloto - Jan 5, 2012
|'becoming an Au Pair in America' - UNC essay
5 - I like your essay. I didn't really see anything to correct that wasn't already addressed. Good luck and hope...
Undergraduateekreal - Jan 5, 2012 / omo5031 - Jan 5, 2012
|'struggled heavily with depression' - Pepperdine essay
2 - Wow this is truly a great story although I feel like your narrative takes away from the response. You...
Undergraduategreeley - Jan 5, 2012 / jadore_lamode68 - Jan 5, 2012
|(Submit button) Emerson 'Title of Your Life Essay' 200 words
3 - The Significance of Insignificance is your title right i think that should be the very first line of the...
Undergraduateinkraven - Jan 5, 2012 / greeley - Jan 5, 2012
|Emory Essay (favorite amusement park ride)
4 - This is a good response (I like the prompt as well). I would personally include more about the outlook...
Undergraduatehellokillyhello - Jan 2, 2012 / inkraven - Jan 5, 2012
|'hands are still holding the margin of the pool' significant experience, its impact
2 - Hi, I can help with a few things: "Relax! Folks, don't be afraid. Your hands are still holding...
Undergraduatediaking804 - Jan 4, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Jan 5, 2012
|'My parent first got me interested in math' - Honors College Essay #2
2 - Try wording some of these sentences differently such as: I know why I enjoy it instead try something like:......
UndergraduateSabahm5456 - Jan 5, 2012 / Vinny_Pooh - Jan 5, 2012
|'Failure is common' - UNC supplement
3 - Thanks, and I guess you may be right about those words. I learned all these words for my SATs,...
Undergraduatecollegessay1 - Jan 5, 2012 / collegessay1 - Jan 5, 2012
|'getting bad grades in math again?' - Cornell - College of Arts and Sciences Essay
2 - I realized: it was due to his indirect influence seems a little awkward there^ I would say: I realized...
UndergraduateGrimRippah - Jan 4, 2012 / lakerfanj - Jan 5, 2012
|'work ethic principle' - Transfer Application
Undergraduatearoj93 - Jan 5, 2012 / dylanpreston123 - Jan 5, 2012
|'fear and paranoia had closed my lips' - USC, personal statement
UndergraduateStevenWong206 - Jan 4, 2012 / StevenWong206 - Jan 5, 2012
|'The perfectionist' - the unique qualities that attract you to the specific College
UndergraduateDilara1010 - Jan 5, 2012 / ajtred - Jan 5, 2012
|'humorous and brainless discussion' - UNC essay
Undergraduateekreal - Jan 5, 2012 / ekreal - Jan 5, 2012
|Minutes Of Fame--UNC Supplement
3 - I agree with Uchenna! Great essay, but the conclusion/what you've learned from this experience and what you want to...
UndergraduateDinoSawyer - Jan 5, 2012 / ekreal - Jan 5, 2012
|The Turkish Community ("Deeee - lah - rah") - Common Application
UndergraduateDilara1010 - Dec 20, 2011 / Dilara1010 - Jan 5, 2012
|'Education cannot be taken from you' - HOWARD PERSONAL STATEMENT
4 - Very good essay, can't really find anything wrong, but maybe you could elaborate more on a few activities instead...
Undergraduateangiepie - Jan 4, 2012 / DinoSawyer - Jan 5, 2012
|'My mother is a vivid example' - CommonApp: Significant person
5 - Nick_VT, I think you have a very strong, inspirational story written here. I don't think your intro was...
Undergraduatenick_vt - Jan 5, 2012 / aroj93 - Jan 5, 2012
|'the last United Way meeting' - Georgetown General
Undergraduatedylanpreston123 - Jan 4, 2012 / aroj93 - Jan 5, 2012
|THE BUSINESS BOOT CAMP -COMMONAPP EXPERIENCE THAT HAS SHAPED MY LIFE
Undergraduatejaneth - Jan 3, 2012 / soufianelaouad - Jan 5, 2012
|'Angie's optimism' - Pepperdine essay: Community service experience
NEW - Hi guys, I'm submitting this today!!! I really need help on this essay, any constructive criticism or advice on...
Undergraduateklipper46 - Jan 5, 2012 / — -
|Community of scholars whose goal is to enrich the educational experience
UndergraduateSabahm5456 - Jan 3, 2012 / Sabahm5456 - Jan 5, 2012
|'my question asking habit' - Boston University Roommate
Undergraduateklipper46 - Jan 1, 2012 / klipper46 - Jan 5, 2012
|'Exuberance' -- Common App Essay #6 Free Choice
6 - Hi Erica, Yeah that's the common app #6 and I could write on whatever I'd like to as individual...
Undergraduatehwei1994 - Nov 29, 2011 / hwei1994 - Jan 5, 2012
|'Math teamwork' - Short Common App EC Paragraph (Math)
2 - It sounds very intelligent however you contradict yourself. At first you say you didn't believe in teamwork but at...
Undergraduatemichaelmas - Jan 5, 2012 / Cleopatra - Jan 5, 2012
|Research and Peace Corps - Lewis and Clark/Carleton supplements
2 - I think the first two are great but in the second one you should mention what youre interested in...
Undergraduatederamirez - Jan 5, 2012 / Cleopatra - Jan 5, 2012
|A question on texas' college topic *an issue of importance* (what to write about?)
3 - I wrote something similar for one of my essays. It's great! The idea is solid, include some real life...
Undergraduatecrystal_castles - Jan 3, 2012 / delljonathan - Jan 5, 2012
|Colgate -VENE VIDI VICCI- DESTINATION TURKEY
Undergraduatejaneth - Jan 4, 2012 / ericao2010 - Jan 5, 2012
|RA essay--Purpose of RA position and responsibilites
Undergraduateericao2010 - Jan 4, 2012 / hwei1994 - Jan 5, 2012
|'Inspiraducation' - Emory Supplement
2 - intoduction essay two;more than as if on aircrash you could say a better fast drop decription and add unforeseeable...
Undergraduatehwei1994 - Jan 5, 2012 / janeth - Jan 5, 2012
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