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|'Duke supports their Sport clubs' - Duke Essay
Undergraduateekreal - Jan 2, 2012 / ekreal - Jan 2, 2012
|Cornell Supplement. Desire for knowledge and Math.
7 - yosh! I fixed some more things and finally submitted it XD thank you guys for all the advice and...
UndergraduateDaeDae - Jan 1, 2012 / DaeDae - Jan 2, 2012
|'individuality and self-exploration' - Why Oberlin College?
3 - Hello! First of all I can relate to your weirdness :P However, the way this college phrased their prompt...
UndergraduateItsokaytoGaga - Jan 2, 2012 / GraceTaylorWei - Jan 2, 2012
|'shine brighter in Mexico' - Cornell supplement (Arts and Sciences essay question)
UndergraduatePRICE1234 - Jan 2, 2012 / Jennyflower81 - Jan 2, 2012
|'interest lies in Economics' - Northwestern Supp Essay
Undergraduateabck300 - Jan 2, 2012 / msaenz - Jan 2, 2012
|My Y BU essay (Economics department)
9 - These are the things you mentioned in your essay -City -Studying with smart students -Diversity I think you...
Undergraduateeasyfu - Dec 25, 2011 / abck300 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Leaders aren't born they are made' - UNC at Chapel Hill Essay
Undergraduatemsaenz - Jan 2, 2012 / msaenz - Jan 2, 2012
|Pomona Essay- Scheduling Experience
Undergraduatepinkcheetah - Jan 2, 2012 / pinkcheetah - Jan 2, 2012
|'An ace in tennis' - Common app Short constructed Response - Tennis
Undergraduatesummerman52 - Jan 2, 2012 / pinkcheetah - Jan 2, 2012
|'a soccer pitch' - Extracurricular Activity
UndergraduateDavemedsci - Jan 1, 2012 / Davemedsci - Jan 2, 2012
|'I will go with my stubbornness' - Upenn Intoduce Yourself
9 - I like your responses but I think you should be a little more specific, like the question on what...
Undergraduatemaroon5 - Jan 2, 2012 / insanesoul81994 - Jan 2, 2012
|'becoming a chef' - Why Duke-FOCUS Program and sport scene
2 - Like the first paragraph, but look at your use of commas. For second paragraph, tell more about why you...
Undergraduatesibylisaprophet - Jan 2, 2012 / Jono18 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Hairspray songs' - a time in which you left your comfort zone
3 - thank you! :)...
Undergraduatenerd4life - Jan 2, 2012 / nerd4life - Jan 2, 2012
|(Annual Hanami Festival / Meeting Strangers) COMMON APPs
7 - I liked your first essay much better because it is unconventional and the metaphor works very well. Please check...
Undergraduatestevenyy - Jan 1, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 2, 2012
|Lunchtime at the Angora: Boston University Supplement Essay
Undergraduatesamsonmccrady - Jan 2, 2012 / samsonmccrady - Jan 2, 2012
|'How Obesity Shaped Me' - Common App Essay #1
2 - You have a terrific essay. I especially like where you wrote about the "As the mounds of fat melted...
Undergraduatetubsofanger - Jan 2, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 2, 2012
|'building the life skills and a work ethic' - Why Harvey Mudd
2 - A well focused essay, and I don't see much problems with grammar or style. PLEASE review my Pomona essay....
Undergraduateinsanesoul81994 - Jan 2, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Living and dreaming' - University of Chicago Long Essay
12 - This is a well laid-out essay, but it would be stronger if you added some of your own examples...
Undergraduatejasononwenu - Dec 29, 2011 / saurabh93 - Jan 2, 2012
|'enjoy working with others' - Why Uchicago?
4 - I think this is a great essay. You talk about lots of specific parts about the school without making...
Undergraduatetehfunkicookie - Jan 1, 2012 / elephant1 - Jan 2, 2012
|'my scientist family' - Supplement- Why UChicago?
Undergraduateashatan - Jan 1, 2012 / elephant1 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Graham' - Brandeis - Common App Essay - Significant Person
Undergraduatewalcotted - Jan 1, 2012 / elephant1 - Jan 2, 2012
|'WHY I DO NOT WEAR PANTS' - Common App
7 - The beginning is really good. Caught my attention instantly. But I got lost after the quote you used. Leggings?...
Undergraduateelephant1 - Dec 30, 2011 / Jono18 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Surfing and water' - Common App: Extracurricular Essay
UndergraduateTGIDP - Jan 1, 2012 / elephant1 - Jan 2, 2012
|'victim to creeping doubts' - SIGNIFICANT EXPERIENCE
4 - I think this essay is good, but it seems as if you are just listing things about yourself. The...
Undergraduatejadore_lamode68 - Dec 31, 2011 / elephant1 - Jan 2, 2012
|'interested in Psychology, Biology and Sociology' Why is Duke the right fit?
Undergraduateekreal - Jan 2, 2012 / ekreal - Jan 2, 2012
|'Sociology and tutoring English and Korean' - CORNELL (COLLEGE OF ART&SCIENCE)
3 - enable me to to specialize will greatly benefit to my studies.-Consider saying something like "will greatly benefit the...
Undergraduatepjw7109 - Jan 1, 2012 / Kylemac - Jan 2, 2012
|(the city life / good impression / medical field) - Boston U Essays
7 - Hey anyone who answered on here please read my thread you really dont have to even read the essay...
Undergraduateblackjack11z - Jan 2, 2012 / Kylemac - Jan 2, 2012
|'an aspiring journalist' - Boston University - Diversity
Undergraduatezerw - Jan 2, 2012 / pjw7109 - Jan 2, 2012
|Supplement Essay on a Bad Decision. (I chose a bad haircut)
3 - I would be careful to mention "Seventeen Magazine" if you are going to, later, blame them for your mistake....
Undergraduatecrew12 - Jan 2, 2012 / angiepie - Jan 2, 2012
|My obsession with giraffes(UGA ESSAY)
Undergraduateangiepie - Jan 2, 2012 / angiepie - Jan 2, 2012
|'a plethora of raw materials' - northwestern supplement
2 - I describe myself as curious and I want a nurturing experience with mentors that encourage my interests and guide...
Undergraduatectranisaurus1 - Jan 2, 2012 / Kylemac - Jan 2, 2012
|Geography and Economics/Politics (UK Personal Statement)
NEW - I know it's long, but it would be great if someone could check for grammar. And if you have...
Undergraduateka19921 - Jan 2, 2012 / — -
|'encouraged to study sciences' - Cornell Supplement..CALS
Undergraduatehamzaobaid - Jan 2, 2012 / hamzaobaid - Jan 2, 2012
|'Brave New World and perfect society' - Common Application Topic of your choice
UndergraduateDavemedsci - Dec 29, 2011 / Davemedsci - Jan 2, 2012
|Cornell CAS Essay - My interest in International Affairs
6 - Ohh, yeah my college counsellor said the same. Thank you for reminding me! I'll get right on it. Oh...
UndergraduateShaLa28 - Jan 2, 2012 / ShaLa28 - Jan 2, 2012
|"Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh," Panic's frantic scream echoed in the cavernous cave.
Undergraduatederemifri - Jan 1, 2012 / ZhoeK - Jan 2, 2012
|'I always wear a purple hat' - Johns hopkins supplement #2
19 - thank you so much Thomas, I already submitted the essay before I was this. It was due yesterday. Thanks...
Undergraduateomo5031 - Dec 30, 2011 / omo5031 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Reading is my guilty pleasure' - Upenn Introduce yourself
Undergraduateyusra12 - Dec 31, 2011 / DrunkLurker - Jan 2, 2012
|(Ironman / Music as a way of life) UIUC essays
2 - Ever since childhood...doesn't make sense so change it to something else other then that both the essays are very...
Undergraduateheyitzaustin - Jan 2, 2012 / fizz - Jan 2, 2012
|'not easy to find a major' - reasons for transferring and the objectives to achieve
4 - I think usually that would go onto the supplement essay, but I'm not too sure about it. You can...
UndergraduateWenjian Zhang - Dec 27, 2011 / kingkung - Jan 2, 2012
|BU Supplement - Roommate - Mulan, Field Report
4 - Thanks for all the comments/critiques! I can't decide if I want to keep this format or just go with...
Undergraduatealtang1 - Jan 2, 2012 / altang1 - Jan 2, 2012
|'determined to become a better swimmer' - Stanford -- What matters to you and why?
5 - yeah, your idea of what matters does not come till the very end. my question throughout the whole thing...
Undergraduatesaurabh93 - Jan 1, 2012 / gris_pereyra - Jan 2, 2012
|'I figure out the mechanics of any object' - STANFORD: roommate letter
2 - maybe try to cut down the description about astronomy and engineering. be more concise about your point.. your words...
Undergraduatenkcnatalee864 - Jan 2, 2012 / gris_pereyra - Jan 2, 2012
|Self-Fulfillment ---What matters to you and Why (which beginning is best?)
8 - This is a good essay but find a better link between running and socializing. And PLEASE help with my...
Undergraduategris_pereyra - Dec 26, 2011 / saurabh93 - Jan 2, 2012
|'Design and Steve Jobs' - Stanford What matters to you and why?
UndergraduateAbsoluteBliss - Jan 2, 2012 / AbsoluteBliss - Jan 2, 2012
|'Mexican culture' - Yale/ Harvard supplement
15 - Your first paragraph is pretty great, but this: "I recognized that one's identity can change in just mere seconds,...
Undergraduateluvicemocha - Dec 29, 2011 / AbsoluteBliss - Jan 2, 2012
|'youthful and critical college years' - Stanford Roommate
5 - I also agree that I can't see anything wrong with this! Honestly. I don't think you need to change...
Undergraduatesaurabh93 - Dec 31, 2011 / jacquelinetucci - Jan 2, 2012
|'double majoring in Astronomy and Economics' - CORNELL
3 - Squeeze this sentences, which are somewhat repetitious. I like the way you connect Cornell Prof. with your college choice,...
Undergraduateb00kw0rm2012 - Jan 1, 2012 / duckling - Jan 2, 2012
|Ryerson-Journalism Application Essay: Anderson Cooper's Coverage of Hurricane Katrina
3 - Thank you! Noted. The only thing is I need to stay within the "approximately 300" word limit and this...
Undergraduatejacquelinetucci - Jan 1, 2012 / jacquelinetucci - Jan 2, 2012
|Cornell essay (School of Industrial and Labor Relations)
Undergraduatechazzmil - Jan 1, 2012 / duckling - Jan 1, 2012
|'a convenience store in a small town' - Princeton - What did you do this summer
4 - Your essay is well written. I pointed out some grammatical issues above so keep those in mind. HOWEVER, I...
Undergraduatepringles - Jan 1, 2012 / TheLeader - Jan 1, 2012
|'desire and passion to learn about diverse cultures' Cornell intellectual interests
3 - The approach and context is very good, but talk more about how you plan to integrate what you have...
Undergraduatecastro17 - Jan 1, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 1, 2012
|'constantly keep improving myself' - Stanford - what matters to you?
2 - I would recommend using an anecdote since they help vividly illustrate how improving oneself truly matters to you. Good...
Undergraduateadkh14 - Jan 1, 2012 / saurabh93 - Jan 1, 2012
|'my horrid archenemy, Spanish' - Princeton - Voice Essay
Undergraduatepringles - Jan 1, 2012 / ekreal - Jan 1, 2012
|UChicago "Guess The Third Thing Essay"
3 - Thanks for the feedback! @alexxisx I used past tense because it happened in the past, while my conclusion...
Undergraduatezeeluvia - Jan 1, 2012 / zeeluvia - Jan 1, 2012
|'Friday of Anger' - stanford supplement what matters to you essay
Undergraduatem7md - Jan 1, 2012 / ericao2010 - Jan 1, 2012
|"Are you American too?" - UPenn Short
UndergraduateElsaG - Jan 1, 2012 / ElsaG - Jan 1, 2012
|'dialogue with amazing individuals' - NYU SUPPLEMENT
Undergraduatejadore_lamode68 - Jan 1, 2012 / jadore_lamode68 - Jan 1, 2012
|'doctor's hands perform miracles' - Stony Brook Med Supplement
3 - Therefore, it needs to be fast and agile. -> Therefore, they need to be fast and agile. After...
Undergraduatecalvinwang - Jan 1, 2012 / lifeisgoing1 - Jan 1, 2012
|'my place among poets' - University of Michigan- A Group You Belong To
Undergraduatesteph22222 - Jan 1, 2012 / rockbiter - Jan 1, 2012
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