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|Stanford Intellectual vitality- Watching teletubbies
3 - @lorna I completely agree with @Holt You are completely going out of your way since there is no significant...
Undergraduatelorna - Dec 16, 2016 / nandasharma - Dec 17, 2016
|Essay for Undergraduate Admission Application: "A Break Up to Remember"
6 - Admission Essays are supposed to show who you are. You are just describing the event and girlfriend here. What...
Undergraduatejames170499 - Dec 13, 2016 / TechRinser - Dec 17, 2016
|I had to overcome my greatest fear. I blacked out in front of forty-six delegates. MIT SUPPLEMENTAL
Undergraduatelorna - Dec 16, 2016 / Sneedae - Dec 16, 2016
|"How cupcakes helped me grow" - UVA prompt
UndergraduateSneedae - Dec 16, 2016 / mualla - Dec 16, 2016
|Some thoughts about flying kites, Bradeis essay
UndergraduateJessica Xie - Dec 16, 2016 / Holt - Dec 16, 2016
|Challenging English - Learning this language became my goal
9 - after cracking Vidyagyan Entrance test, English alphabets sounds a bit awkward, just use Alphabet instead when a...
Undergraduateabdon786 - Dec 14, 2016 / lorna - Dec 16, 2016
|LOR - recommendation for the course in Economics majors in the University.
2 - Prasoon, thank you for starting the new thread for your essay. I assure you that this will be the...
Undergraduatemishra - Dec 16, 2016 / Holt - Dec 16, 2016
|From a kid to an adolescent who surmounted the backbreaking real life crisis.
2 - Vlad, this is a pretty good response to the prompt that you have written. I have a question though,...
Undergraduatevladmir - Dec 16, 2016 / Holt - Dec 16, 2016
|Tufts supplemental essay on collective participation; 'Constantly stepping out of comfort zones'
Undergraduatengokhoa99 - Dec 16, 2016 / ngokhoa99 - Dec 16, 2016
|Archery develops me both morally and spiritually; Common app - Extra curriculars
3 - Cherub, please provide the complete prompt for the extra curricular activity so that your essay can be properly assessed...
Undergraduategundala1 - Dec 30, 2012 / Holt - Dec 16, 2016
|Education a distant dream for girl child
6 - @Holt thanks for suggestion but I want to get some good starting for my Essay please share if you...
Undergraduatemishra - Dec 14, 2016 / mishra - Dec 15, 2016
|Cornell CAS essay - seemingly-divergent TV shows and interdepartmental learning
8 - Angeli, always opt to write the straightforward essay whenever you have the chance. You see, the major mistake of...
Undergraduateangeli6778 - Dec 10, 2016 / Holt - Dec 15, 2016
|Northwestern's global presence and its inner niches... What aspects of Northwestern appeal most to m
Undergraduateangeli6778 - Dec 14, 2016 / angeli6778 - Dec 15, 2016
|"I could have been the member of the same lot..." Personal Essay
6 - ... "They are not educated and are unaware of their right... ... and the addiction which trapped their life...
Undergraduateabdon786 - Dec 14, 2016 / Jeremy Newcastl - Dec 15, 2016
|As an international student at ABC, how would you enrich the campus community? (250 words)
Undergraduatesus_007 - Dec 15, 2016 / Holt - Dec 15, 2016
|'One In A Million' Northwestern Supplement : unique qualities of Northwestern...?
2 - Nafisa, your response sounds more like a travelogue than a well thought analysis of why you chose to apply...
Undergraduatecitylights - Jan 4, 2014 / Holt - Dec 15, 2016
|Invictus- How 14 Words Changed Me (UVa supplement)
3 - Maddi, the essay's first half can use more of the backstory regarding your character before you read those 14...
Undergraduatemaddi - Jan 1, 2014 / Holt - Dec 15, 2016
|Embarrassing situation in the Exam Hall because of fear. 'A lesson from failure' essay
12 - You can start by telling about the preparations you made on exam day. You don't need to talk about...
Undergraduatevghimanshu2 - Dec 14, 2016 / Holt - Dec 15, 2016
|Computers are ever-changing. I want to develop software that can make people's life easier.
7 - I agree with @sus_007 I also have a same essay about computer. There are lots kinds of computer...
Undergraduatevghimanshu2 - Dec 14, 2016 / Hoaidepchi - Dec 14, 2016
|I want to pursue Mathematics. The reasons for my inclination are many more than what I can express..
3 - @abdon786 Hi there, I think you should consider these things -The reasons for my interest and inclination are many...
Undergraduateabdon786 - Dec 14, 2016 / Hoaidepchi - Dec 14, 2016
|From a plagiarized song to the song of the year - from a failure to the success
3 - Rohit, the essay asks about your failure so the slant of your presentation is wrong. The failure presented in...
Undergraduaterohittiwari - Dec 14, 2016 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|Describing an Activity for University Admissions - Opinions Come Hither
5 - Normally, the 50 word statement is too short for you to include anyone else in the description. So, yes,...
UndergraduateCDuke93 - Dec 14, 2016 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|In your opinion, what are the five characteristics of a successful person? Supplementary essay.
8 - @Holt Don't worry, Mary. They are different schools. I just wanted to have your opinion on this. Thanks, anyways....
Undergraduatesus_007 - Dec 10, 2016 / sus_007 - Dec 14, 2016
|There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve. It is the fear of failure.
2 - Rohit, kindly provide the full prompt requirement as a reference for the editing of your essay. It is too...
Undergraduaterohittiwari - Dec 14, 2016 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|"Sorry son I can't afford your higher education" - Common App Essay on transition to adulthood
2 - Rudra, you are supposed to be discussing an event that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood. That is...
Undergraduateksingh155 - Dec 14, 2016 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|7 Prime ministers changed after the end of monarchy on 23rd December 2007.
13 - I spotted a few capitalization errors that you should watch out for. Specifically, change the C in Country to...
Undergraduatemaruko42 - Dec 13, 2016 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|I gradually felt a big part missing from me.
9 - @Holt I agree with what you are saying. I'll redo the essay keeping in mind your suggestions. Thank you...
Undergraduatefall2017 - Dec 14, 2016 / fall2017 - Dec 14, 2016
|Admission Essay - 250 Words, Describe More About An Activity You Do
6 - In all honesty, I did not see the objective of your explanation within your statement. I reviewed the prompt...
UndergraduateCDuke93 - Dec 13, 2016 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|Since a very young age, I have learned to be independent and make decisions on my own
UndergraduatePri901 - Dec 14, 2016 / Pri901 - Dec 14, 2016
|'the program uniqueness and location of UBC'. Your Opinion on my UBC Admissions Question Response
6 - @Holt @mualla Thank you to both of you for reading and evaluating my writing. I have made corrections...
UndergraduateCDuke93 - Dec 12, 2016 / CDuke93 - Dec 14, 2016
|Living in Dubai, I wasn't a part of a tight-knit community like I was when living in Los Angeles
2 - Hashem, is there a chance that you can provide us with the complete prompt that you were given? I...
Undergraduatehashemmm - Nov 30, 2015 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|UMich short response, describe a community. "I am the boat."
2 - Quin, you can actually delete more than 8 words by better presenting your second paragraph. There are many redundancies...
Undergraduateiloveyogurt - Jan 3, 2014 / Holt - Dec 14, 2016
|My desire for a liberal arts education with a perfect academic and social environment balance.
3 - Hello Maruko42, Since I have always longed (...) everyone studies what they love. **I'm not too sure what...
Undergraduatemaruko42 - Dec 13, 2016 / CDuke93 - Dec 13, 2016
|Transition to Childhood: Encouraging Pat: "That was a really excellent presentation"
3 - Tara, you are writing a transition to adulthood essay. What you wrote doesn't really qualify for this essay prompt...
UndergraduateTechRinser - Dec 13, 2016 / Holt - Dec 13, 2016
|What do you and XYZ university have in common?(250-350 words)
4 - Sushant, here is the thing, you should be writing a straightforward comparison essay of the commonalities between you and...
Undergraduatesus_007 - Dec 13, 2016 / Holt - Dec 13, 2016
|Columbia supplement question- Do I answer the question or is it too vague?
2 - You are asking us to determine if your response to the prompt question is appropriate or vague. I would...
Undergraduategarmin610 - Jan 6, 2014 / Holt - Dec 13, 2016
|Duke, Pratt College of Engineering Essay: "Why do you want to study at Duke"
3 - Noah, reverse the paragraphs in your essay. The second paragraph immediately offers information as to why you are opting...
Undergraduatethugzook - Dec 13, 2016 / Holt - Dec 13, 2016
|Supportive Family - SOP; undergraduate exchange program (USEFP)
2 - Roonham, this essay is too lighthearted to be an effective statement of purpose. In fact, your purpose for wishing...
Undergraduateroonham - Nov 16, 2013 / Holt - Dec 13, 2016
|My great singing performance in the Talent Show of Harvard AUSCR Summit for Young Leaders in China
4 - It is definitely okay and you should develop it further for the presentation. Don't forget, the reviewer will be...
UndergraduateJessica Xie - Dec 12, 2016 / Holt - Dec 12, 2016
|Becoming independent - challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this
3 - Hello,Brianalevett.I'm an undergraduate and major in English.I also want to be helped via this website.So at first,I must answer...
Undergraduatebrianalevett - Nov 28, 2016 / Doomsdayrefugee - Dec 12, 2016
|The Haunted House Next Door
2 - Nilbert, when you are writing a descriptive horror story, you have to pay attention to the words that you...
Undergraduatennilbertgati - Nov 13, 2016 / Holt - Dec 12, 2016
|'academic challenges' International Transfer Student Essay to UMCP
2 - Catherine, since you already have 2 years college experience, you should be reflecting upon that experience in your essay...
Undergraduateazureskyline - Jan 5, 2014 / Holt - Dec 12, 2016
|Trying to reach the stars one year into my Journey in the US...should I not?
9 - Giulio, this is a very literary look at your background. It speaks volumes of where you came from, what...
Undergraduategiuzu98 - Dec 11, 2016 / Holt - Dec 12, 2016
|This university has dedicated itself to "nurturing honest, eager, and critical minds" I can offer it
5 - I really think this essay is well written. I think if you're sure of your capabilities then why not...
Undergraduatenerdella - Dec 10, 2016 / nazzia30 - Dec 11, 2016
|The sole intention of the education is to equip the students with as much knowledge as possible
5 - Knowledge is one thing, but don't forget about critical thinking - without it knowledge is useless (you won't be...
Undergraduatezemo1993 - Dec 9, 2016 / Rich Monte - Dec 11, 2016
|Aptly described by a friend as "tenacious", my determination and dogged devotion to any task
3 - Lyndsay, I have to say that you have written a very humorous essay here. Your depiction of yourself as...
Undergraduatenerdella - Dec 10, 2016 / Holt - Dec 11, 2016
|Describe a religious, cultural, or family tradition you can share with the Colgate community.
11 - @Holt How about now, sir ? Deusi Rey... Every Nepalese family revels in the annual fiesta of lights,...
Undergraduatesus_007 - Dec 8, 2016 / sus_007 - Dec 10, 2016
|Extracurricular essay- can someone help me correct or improve it
8 - Vinesh, your statement is too broad in concept and does not fully focus on one aspect of the extra...
Undergraduatekervina - Dec 9, 2016 / Holt - Dec 10, 2016
|My girlfriend. This girl changed me as a person. Penn State Personal Statement
7 - Hai, you have written the wrong response for the prompt. This essay is not about other people and their...
Undergraduatehle2000 - Dec 7, 2016 / Holt - Dec 10, 2016
|Application answer with fun. Need some help and advice to improve and make it funnier
3 - Excellent work Kerwin! I was really drawn into the events that unfolded in the locker room that day. I...
Undergraduatekervina - Dec 8, 2016 / Holt - Dec 8, 2016
|A Bird in the hand is worth two in a bush
2 - Mohamoud, did you accidentally post the wrong response for this prompt? There is nothing in the essay that you...
Undergraduateproud - Dec 8, 2016 / Holt - Dec 8, 2016
|My exchange year in Orange, MA was overwhelmingly full of things for me to learn from
2 - Arhum, don't tell the reviewer that this experience made you transition from childhood to adulthood. Show him that the...
UndergraduateArhum - Dec 8, 2016 / Holt - Dec 8, 2016
|Intra-university transfer statement detailing why you want to join School of Information Studies
5 - You should definitely change the path of your presentation. While there is only a single major offered be university,...
UndergraduateMehzah - Dec 7, 2016 / Holt - Dec 8, 2016
|Finally stepping out of my comfort zone- help with my motivational statement for Peace corps!
3 - Marilu, your essay has the beginnings of a strong discussion as to why you were motivated to join the...
Undergraduatemsb08010 - Dec 7, 2016 / Holt - Dec 8, 2016
|Recount a time when something really made you laugh. Smith and Colgate University supplemental
3 - Nice essays AmbigaY!!For the first essay, I think it is not simple to tell that story in only 200...
UndergraduateAmbigaY - Dec 7, 2016 / Amatis250 - Dec 7, 2016
|I come from a family of chefs- MIT essay
8 - Ambigay, you are concentrating the essay on yourself. That is not what the essay wants you to present. This...
UndergraduateAlvinos - Dec 4, 2016 / Holt - Dec 6, 2016
|I have a dual personality. What would it mean to you to call yourself an AU Eagle?
5 - @Holt Thank you for helping me out. Since the word limit is only 100 words, I am struggling to...
Undergraduatefall2017 - Dec 6, 2016 / fall2017 - Dec 6, 2016
|Why Information and Decision Science essay
3 - @zuzzaa02 Hi, Zuzanna! I agree with @Holt. I think you might miss the point here. According to...
Undergraduatezuzzaa02 - Dec 5, 2016 / Jessica Xie - Dec 6, 2016
|Ever since I was small, I have been intrigued by discussions (SUA Essay Prompt)
Undergraduatefall2017 - Nov 28, 2016 / fall2017 - Dec 6, 2016
|How my inability to speak has affected me in negative ways
6 - See if this conclusion works for you. My religious belief caused me to be bullied by so-called "friends"...
UndergraduateUnBound - Dec 4, 2016 / Holt - Dec 6, 2016
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