|Undergraduate [25,738] - page 231 of 429|
|'permanent disabilities' - Describe the world you come from...
Undergraduategera229 - Sep 28, 2011 / gera229 - Sep 30, 2011
|Questbridge Autobiographical Essay -"We don't speak at the dinner table."
3 - As Susan said, well-written and powerful! Great diction and vocabulary, great imagery. I can't find the resolution in...
Undergraduateantiquity - Sep 28, 2011 / irenesue - Sep 30, 2011
|'I have visited Iran multiple times' - GEORGIA TECH APPLICATION
Undergraduatepouriah - Sep 28, 2011 / Asmita_ - Sep 29, 2011
|'the National Honor Society' -FSU application (leadership, learning, service, global)
3 - Thanks for critiquing my two essays! Personally, I think you described your inspiration and actions too much. You...
Undergraduatedanielladelucia - Sep 27, 2011 / Riceboy - Sep 29, 2011
|"Challenge of a Clown" - Rutgers Undergraduate Essay
Undergraduatejunpark7667 - Sep 29, 2011 / junpark7667 - Sep 29, 2011
|Questionbridge Essays #1 and #2: "Insignificance Breeds Success" & "Americanization"
2 - Amazing! Fantastic! You will be accepted no doubt! I liked the space essay the best, until I finished the...
UndergraduateRiceboy - Sep 28, 2011 / danielladelucia - Sep 29, 2011
|'without my step-father...' - Someone who has made an impact in your life
Undergraduatejustino2012 - Sep 29, 2011 / danielladelucia - Sep 29, 2011
|'Raised in Hamilton, New Jersey' - Rutgers Undergrad Essay-Diversity
2 - Just one quick comment. You can merge the last paragraph into the passage, and you will be showing rather...
Undergraduatejaswin24 - Sep 29, 2011 / Noob in writing - Sep 29, 2011
|'TelePortal' - If you could invent something - GaTech Essay
2 - Cute essay. This doesn't make sense..."invention in creation". And don't say "right wing anti environmentalist". What if your admissions...
Undergraduateedzhu1 - Sep 29, 2011 / danielladelucia - Sep 29, 2011
|What most influenced you to apply to The GWU - how not to give my life story?
3 - I had a similar problem with an essay I was writing for UVA because I wanted to incorporate the...
Undergraduatejosomo - Sep 28, 2011 / trishhha - Sep 29, 2011
|Any ideas on the u of m business school essay? Ross School of business
5 - All night camps for children with skin diseases that can't go into the sun. Advertisements telling people how bad...
Undergraduatehyun9645 - Oct 25, 2009 / danielladelucia - Sep 29, 2011
|USF supplement ESSay ("to promote learning in the Jesuit Catholic tradition
6 - Probably, how will you contribute to the learning environment. not necesarrily religious, but it might help...
Undergraduatelady_b - Jan 12, 2009 / hcdaniel93 - Sep 29, 2011
|"work hard, my son" - QuestBridge Bio Essay
UndergraduateAtelophobia - Sep 28, 2011 / Atelophobia - Sep 29, 2011
|"Visualizing Perfection" - Questbridge Biographical Essay
6 - I would chose either one of the two at the end, and remove "superior" or use a different word....
UndergraduateSwindle - Sep 28, 2011 / Riceboy - Sep 29, 2011
|Cross Country Trip ('a career in business') - Common App Transfer
3 - Thank you very much, your help is greatly appreciated. Unfortunately I do not know Ian, although its very possible...
Undergraduatemcq776 - Sep 28, 2011 / mcq776 - Sep 29, 2011
|Questbridge essay, "Gerardo's Fifth"
2 - The first elongated note escapes from the strings of the violins, violas, and cellos, filling the hall with a...
Undergraduategeracam10 - Sep 28, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 29, 2011
|'learning from those mistake' - FSU
2 - I can still vividly remember resting my forehead on the back of the toilet seat, small shreds of tobacco...
Undergraduatetc634 - Sep 27, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 29, 2011
|'Elder care' - Elaborate One of Your Extracurricular Activity
4 - thank you ^^...
UndergraduateSophya - Sep 27, 2011 / Sophya - Sep 29, 2011
|'my heartbeat came back in just a few seconds' - Common App
5 - The first draft has a more capturing opening. Good demonstration of how the experience at the ER and PSVT...
Undergraduatecluemegan - Sep 27, 2011 / irenesue - Sep 29, 2011
|'Science has been my passion' - Wisconsin-madison STATEMENT
3 - Hey susan, thank you so much!i really appreciate the help.but i want some opinion also on if you...
Undergraduatevadalis - Sep 27, 2011 / vadalis - Sep 29, 2011
|Stage for me - common app essay
4 - Thank you for the suggestions & corrections guys! A non-native English speaker, I'm a little worried about my...
UndergraduatePaul Jo - Sep 22, 2011 / Paul Jo - Sep 29, 2011
|'teacher actually knew the students' names' - Why did you apply to UCF?
3 - i think you should add sth about the major or sth more academic to your essay. It will convince...
UndergraduateHunter - Sep 27, 2011 / richard35568 - Sep 29, 2011
|"Don't worry trooper!" - Quesbridge Essay #2
2 - "There are no earthquakes in Florida!" The reactions I got from my friends regarding the chair were a...
UndergraduateAU0594 - Sep 27, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 28, 2011
|'enthusiastic in psychology' - common app： UMich choosing CLAS
2 - The University of Michigan's These are the essential factors that attract me to LSA. The psychology department...
Undergraduategemini61975 - Sep 27, 2011 / JessEllen - Sep 28, 2011
|'Outstanding medical services to the populations of Texas' - Physician Assistant
NEW - Personal Statement/Narrative. Please describe your motivation towards becoming a PA 5000 characters limit = approx. 625 words. Characters include...
Undergraduatebrendalee17 - Sep 28, 2011 / — -
|'some Americans don't know proper English Grammar' My favorite school subject and why
NEW - Catarina Perez Mrs. Glaus 9/28/11 Grade 9th E9C: The subject I like most in school is English. I...
Undergraduatebabycat67 - Sep 28, 2011 / — -
|'The field of dentistry' - UVA career possibility relation to course of study
5 - Oh... that means it does not have the energy of inspiration. When you feel that inspired feeling well...
Undergraduatettuu - Sep 26, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Sep 28, 2011
|uchicago "Between living and dreaming there is a third thing. Guess it."
Undergraduatelt12528 - Aug 4, 2011 / EF_Kevin - Sep 28, 2011
|'My Friday Nights' - Common Application Short Answer
3 - It's great you can see leadership in such an experience. I think you can elaborate more on your leadership...
Undergraduatehixtine - Sep 26, 2011 / Sophya - Sep 28, 2011
|"envision myself excelling in everything I do" - Questbridge Autobiographical Essay
4 - Here's my 2nd draft -- I have until Friday, but really, I'd like to submit my application by tomorrow!...
Undergraduatejayelectrolosis - Sep 24, 2011 / jayelectrolosis - Sep 28, 2011
|'Volunteering at local library' - QuestBridge Significant Achievement
2 - I think this is very good, needs no grammatical or spelling correction. Your metaphors are a nice touch!...
Undergraduatejnbadj - Sep 26, 2011 / lindseymatter - Sep 27, 2011
|'to replace petroleum and coal' - Questbridge! Change one thing in your community
NEW - If you could change one thing about your community, what would it be and why? I've always had a...
Undergraduatelindseymatter - Sep 27, 2011 / — -
|"Education is the only way" - Questbridge Biographical Essay
2 - You have a couple of typos and compound words that shouldn't be compounded...but other tha that, its great :)....
Undergraduateyonomerindo - Sep 24, 2011 / AU0594 - Sep 27, 2011
|Hardships, Challenges, things I've faced in the past - Entrance essay help?
UndergraduateFrecklie - Sep 25, 2011 / bbrunette312 - Sep 27, 2011
|'the nation's most renowned medical institution' - UF
Undergraduateascoolasice - Sep 27, 2011 / ascoolasice - Sep 27, 2011
|"dad's impairment" - (experience, achievement, risk) College Essay
Undergraduatephongtran - Sep 27, 2011 / phongtran - Sep 27, 2011
|"Application influence, dreams, work experience, and mission" Syracuse Supplement
2 - The pamphlet introduced a variety of art-related majors which were offered by Syracuse, and I was immediately intrigued. It...
Undergraduatecclu3312 - Sep 25, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 27, 2011
|'Death happens, but life will go on' - more about me and the context of my life
2 - A day before our school, graduation I learned of Fred's death. Fred Our class had only two days...
UndergraduateEricaKB24 - Sep 27, 2011 / lbedro - Sep 27, 2011
|'Being adopted I have learned...' - the world I came from
2 - My adoptive parents were a couple from California who already had four kids, two of whom were also adopted....
Undergraduatemalia12392 - Sep 25, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 27, 2011
|"Silence; the stereotypical image of an Asian" - experience, risk
Undergraduatebananas11 - Sep 25, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 27, 2011
|'bring me the EKG machine' - one of your activities
2 - I have learned so much by volunteering at the Murphy Medical Center. During the summer of 11th grade,...
Undergraduatendrwum - Sep 25, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 27, 2011
|"women are not inferior" - India issue of importance to you... UT Austin
Undergraduatezainebaby - Sep 23, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 27, 2011
|'the Head-boy of the school' - extra curricular activities
NEW - Since my childhood I have always being looking forward to attending school regularly. My desire to gain knowledge was...
Undergraduatesohaibsiddiqui - Sep 27, 2011 / — -
|"My motivation of not giving up" - UC Personal Statement Prompt#2
3 - Thank you for reminding me the grammatical errors I only used an hour to write this, so there might...
Undergraduatetaxidriverhk - Sep 26, 2011 / taxidriverhk - Sep 27, 2011
|'I started quizzing' - This is my extracurricular statement
3 - The story is good, but I think more details will surely help. Tell about your feelings when you fell...
Undergraduatehcdaniel93 - Sep 26, 2011 / Sophya - Sep 27, 2011
|'My childhood littered with such incidences' - influential person (my brothers)
2 - I loved it! Reminds me of my family. (On a personal note: Believe it or not, you're lucky your...
Undergraduateohayohsiao - Sep 25, 2011 / Sara_sheppard - Sep 27, 2011
|'competitions in Informatics and Physics' - i am applying to TSU from india
2 - My father was a colonel in the Indian army, and as his son, I have had the unique opportunity...
Undergraduatephoenix1991 - Sep 25, 2011 / EF_Susan - Sep 26, 2011
|Bad at Math - CommonApp Work in Progress
Undergraduatelindz7185 - Aug 1, 2011 / hixtine - Sep 26, 2011
|'influenced by my two elder sisters (teacher / school worker)' - FSU
NEW - The essay is an important part of your application. It assists the University in learning about you as an...
Undergraduatepaigemeyers - Sep 26, 2011 / — -
|'a Japanese speaking class' - Elaborate on one extracurricular activity
UndergraduatePaul Jo - Sep 25, 2011 / Editor1010 - Sep 26, 2011
|'a country with a positive society' - Just a start- FSU essay
2 - I realized after the video that leadership is more than being the President I feel as though you should...
Undergraduatenhstudent - Sep 26, 2011 / Editor1010 - Sep 26, 2011
|Math - the subjects with which you had difficulty
2 - Good essay, though it contains many grammatical errors. Have a look at them. Mas - Math Being...
Undergraduatenoboundaries - Sep 26, 2011 / Paul Jo - Sep 26, 2011
|"unfortunate situations are my favorite..." UVA essay
Undergraduatetrishhha - Sep 22, 2011 / trishhha - Sep 26, 2011
|"got me wishing I'm a Yalie" - Why Yale?=Short answer
UndergraduateRechy - Aug 30, 2011 / Rechy - Sep 26, 2011
|'the most demanding engineering courses' - Purdue Admission
Undergraduatecolossus2012 - Sep 26, 2011 / — -
|"Moving cities was simple. Starting a new life was difficult." - Admissions
Undergraduateabrodrick - Sep 23, 2011 / abrodrick - Sep 26, 2011
|'Student Representative' - Common app activities
2 - Awsome start! May i suggest that you add a stronger conclusion to explain how this experience has broadened your...
UndergraduateCostanzojm - Sep 25, 2011 / doodler - Sep 25, 2011
|Questions about how to write my Personal Statement for college.
2 - Personal statement is where you show who you are as a person. Don't mention grades, test scores, etc. Mention...
Undergraduategjm - Sep 25, 2011 / rifatmursalin - Sep 25, 2011
|"Rise Above Your Skill" - Questbridge - Nat'l College Match (Biographical Essay)
4 - As a fellow Natl. College Match Applicant, I commend you on your essay. You are an amazing writer. The...
Undergraduatejborjas31 - Sep 23, 2011 / rifatmursalin - Sep 25, 2011
|Intellectual Adventure with Block Plan - Colorado College supplemental essay
Undergraduateestherfm - Sep 23, 2011 / estherfm - Sep 25, 2011
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