|Undergraduate [25,622] - page 338 of 428|
|"spirit for adventure" - Stanford--What should your roommate know?
5 - I think you want to be informal for your roommate, but also keep it somewhat official. I agree with...
Undergraduateswimchick2266 - Dec 29, 2009 / helpmego2CMC - Dec 29, 2009
|NYU Supplement - famous New Yorker, year 2050, short poem
Undergraduatelekha - Dec 27, 2009 / lekha - Dec 29, 2009
|"In society today" - Application Essay : Notre Dame
Undergraduatemorris7692 - Dec 29, 2009 / starlight - Dec 29, 2009
|What are the benefits of having a diverse educational community?
4 - Hey, big improvement! In conclusion, diversity in educational communities is beneficial in that it teaches students to be more...
Undergraduateyoyopow - Dec 29, 2009 / demuredelight - Dec 29, 2009
|'the science behind my injury' - CORNELL College of Agriculture and Life Sciences
Undergraduateava7217 - Dec 29, 2009 / tkkt1 - Dec 29, 2009
|Experience that reinforced the importance of passion in life - common app #1
4 - thanks, michelle! :) yeah, actually in one of my earlier drafts, i did write about what i learned from...
Undergraduatedayae21 - Dec 27, 2009 / dayae21 - Dec 29, 2009
|Idealist and guard - Notre Dame Supplement the difference in the world
4 - first, thank you forreading my essay! i thoughtyour essay was pretty well-written and the beginnning def is a...
UndergraduateJunieGe - Dec 28, 2009 / TC3 - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App Essay- People's influence on me- The Little Heroes
3 - They carried their one-inch sharpened pencils and their dog-eared and water-beaten(water-beaten or weather-beaten?) books in a burlap sacks that...
Undergraduatechanj - Dec 29, 2009 / bluemenon - Dec 29, 2009
|UPenn Communities Essay... a balance between work and play
4 - 'This program explores the historical connections between the Black and Jewish communities in an effort to improve relations between...
UndergraduateMjtorain - Dec 28, 2009 / mitzimadrid - Dec 29, 2009
|So many possible career paths for me, whether it's educating or working as a pro bono family lawyer
Undergraduatelauren492 - Dec 29, 2009 / lauren492 - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App Essay- Trying to be different but need advice on it
Undergraduatelizrose92 - Dec 29, 2009 / erinhcho - Dec 29, 2009
|Calvin and Hobbes influenced my life - Common App
UndergraduateReach - Dec 28, 2009 / ekfoong - Dec 29, 2009
|NYU-2050 MOVIE (newspaper incident)
Undergraduaterosschang - Dec 29, 2009 / luminousx - Dec 29, 2009
|Crockett to INTERPOL - NYU Prompt 3
7 - Those are pretty good titles, if you're leaning more along a title with the word peace, you could...
Undergraduatenogasa - Dec 29, 2009 / lauren492 - Dec 29, 2009
|Duke Supplement Essay - Why Engineering and why Duke
3 - Let's fix this intro: ...about becoming one thing: an Engineer. More specifically, I wanted to be an Inventor. ...
UndergraduateBlessedHands23 - Dec 26, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|Looking for fundamentals of how everything is functioning Cornell Arts & Sciences 'interests' prompt
7 - Chemistry explains all this, and vivified the intricacies of the matter around us. I decided a long time ago...
Undergraduatebatmankiller - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|Library, books, socializing - MIT significant challenge, help, comment, correct
2 - The one thing you might want to think about is how your portray this as a challenge. Obviously,...
Undergraduatemjellma - Dec 29, 2009 / birthdayattackr - Dec 29, 2009
|Not a Typical Upbringing...Tufts Community Essay
5 - When you say you begged your parents to sign you up for those 3 activities, it implies that they...
Undergraduateshannon92 - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|My Common App essay- written by my "Grandson"
UndergraduateMTcherevik - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|Does this fit the prompt for Pepperdine???
UndergraduateWrestlingnba - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|Global Business and Entrepreneurship Conference, NYU - Common App Essay
2 - I think you should submit the first essay. It illustrates a complete picture of your growing path. I have...
Undergraduatelekha - Dec 29, 2009 / demuredelight - Dec 29, 2009
|Main Common App Essay--An Experience that Impacted You
2 - You have such an elegant writing style, very nice sentences. Okay, this essay is beautifully written, and...
Undergraduateessayhelp - Dec 28, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|What don't you know?- Brown Supplement!
8 - My only concern with this essay is that I've already read more than five essays very similar to this(...
Undergraduatejoosunggrace - Dec 28, 2009 / MSetYo - Dec 29, 2009
|Trinity College Supp - What's your Integrity Contract?
Undergraduatehbrad8002 - Dec 29, 2009 / hbrad8002 - Dec 29, 2009
|Profile Questions and "Why Stanford" - Stanford Supplement Essays
UndergraduateKupcakeKim - Dec 29, 2009 / tkkt1 - Dec 29, 2009
|U-Chicago Free Prompt AND Yale Secondary Essay! - Can I use it for both? :D
10 - I thought it was creative and very well done. You are a very good writer, and you should use...
Undergraduatetimeturner36 - Dec 23, 2009 / purple_eyes - Dec 29, 2009
|Uchicago "Describe a road that you know (real, imagined or metaphorical)" Essay
8 - Thanks everyone. i think that once i make these correction my essay will be great. and if i do...
Undergraduatepoleandreel - Dec 29, 2009 / poleandreel - Dec 29, 2009
|Success - I want to choose the path that will not let me regret taking chances in my life
5 - I have to agree with the earlier posters. The essay readers want to know about you. Sure, background information...
UndergraduateJahnavi71592 - Dec 28, 2009 / Significa - Dec 29, 2009
|Brown University supplement: What don't you know?
6 - You didn't answer the question. I think it is very important to answer the prompt, "What don't you know?"...
Undergraduatenoiresia - Dec 6, 2009 / NAhmed - Dec 29, 2009
|"ecstasy with smells" - Lafayette Supplement: describe a creative interest
2 - I love your essay simply because I'm just as passionate about smells. You, are now officially awesome to me....
Undergraduatenc08dkia - Dec 29, 2009 / paranormale - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App Activity Essay-----FBLA; 'The ten of us intently traded glances'
Undergraduatertgrove123 - Dec 27, 2009 / emorris - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App: Personal Statement (Brass Buddy)
8 - The last sentence is very awkward. Perhaps you could say something like: I know that I'll be able...
Undergraduateparanormale - Dec 29, 2009 / invisiblewriter - Dec 29, 2009
|2002 Olympic Experience for U Washington
Undergraduatedaft123 - Dec 28, 2009 / sbdaiquiri - Dec 29, 2009
|Chinese and American Cultures and Family Eating
2 - Fix these errors: My friends were always a little surprised when they came to my house for dinner...
Undergraduatedaft123 - Dec 29, 2009 / Reach - Dec 29, 2009
|The Tenacious Protest--Common App Essay
Undergraduatespacerelay - Dec 28, 2009 / spacerelay - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App Essay - Who has Influenced You & Issue of Importance
3 - When I read your essays, I can definitely feel that you cherish the past and feel sad about the...
Undergraduatedarkwaffle - Dec 29, 2009 / sakeloga - Dec 29, 2009
|U Chicago main essay: flashdrives and k-pop
8 - this is definitely creative! i enjoyed the mystery of what you were looking at in the beginning. i honestly...
Undergraduatecolorfuloving - Dec 25, 2009 / poleandreel - Dec 29, 2009
|BU: Defining myself with passion for life, sense of humor and dedication
Undergraduatematerial_sloth - Dec 28, 2009 / material_sloth - Dec 29, 2009
|Johns Hopkins Supplement - Why Public Health?
Undergraduatematerial_sloth - Dec 26, 2009 / material_sloth - Dec 29, 2009
|Pomona Supplement- my trip to Alaska
2 - Here are a few thoughts for you: Generally speaking, in the U.S. we only use single quotation...
UndergraduateHBZ - Dec 29, 2009 / Notoman - Dec 29, 2009
|"Learning the Guitar"- My Common Application Essay
5 - I am interested at the subject of this essay (its easier to read than most of the others). Though,...
Undergraduatetpingt - Dec 25, 2009 / poisonivy - Dec 29, 2009
|"the department stores on Fifth Avenue" - Williams Essay
6 - I love this essay. I think you have accomplished precisely what Williams is looking for, perhaps you could include...
Undergraduateguitarbfour - Dec 26, 2009 / cmg12 - Dec 29, 2009
|"Carnegie Mellon? What? Mellon like a watermelon?"; MAJOR & WHY CMU?
6 - imo, i think it is a bit too generic. You need to elaborate and give specific examples on how...
UndergraduateMpx - Dec 22, 2009 / darkwaffle - Dec 29, 2009
|Rice Supplement--why school of natural sciences?
Undergraduateebby2010 - Dec 28, 2009 / ebby2010 - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App essay (person who inspired me)
3 - Yes, I agree with Susan, and I think that, in general, you should start using four-sentence paragraphs. When...
Undergraduateanirudhaw - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|My goal is major in mechanical engineering and enhancing the unmanned technology, especially in cars
3 - Today, engineering has become a crucial subject for our society, and without engineering society would just regress back to...
Undergraduatekeyshop13 - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|SYRACUSE SUPPLEMENT: # 2 ( WORK EXPERIENCE) ANY INPUT?
3 - I have always been a As a teen ager with serious long-term goals, I have been motivated by my...
UndergraduateCobraRose - Dec 25, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|Upenn- Page 217 Middle-aged teenager
11 - What a great, unique essay! One part I dont quite understand (and I'm sure its just my college...
Undergraduatetkkt1 - Dec 28, 2009 / medelman2010 - Dec 29, 2009
|Tufts required essay- describe the environment in which you were raised.
Undergraduategemma2345 - Dec 25, 2009 / gemma2345 - Dec 29, 2009
|Syracuse- influence, work, and experience
Undergraduateangie127 - Dec 29, 2009 / angie127 - Dec 29, 2009
|Rice Supplement: upload an image that appeals to you
12 - NuclearTide: actually, it is required, whether you're submitting the application online or by paper. And although it may not...
Undergraduateebby2010 - Dec 28, 2009 / ebby2010 - Dec 29, 2009
|I was born in Yale-New Haven Hospital, and my father got his PhD from Yale.
6 - You have to get to the "heart" of the yale essay. Its sortof "on the surface", talk more about...
Undergraduatethemaninblack - Dec 19, 2009 / pennhopefull - Dec 29, 2009
|Common App Essay for Middlebury, American, Smith, Mount Holyoke, Dickinson!!
2 - Maybe you could add something at the beginning, some reason you have felt afraid to drive. Do you know...
UndergraduateJVan09 - Dec 28, 2009 / EF_Susan - Dec 29, 2009
|MIT admission essay- difficult situation
2 - Wow. A very impressive essay. Written metaphorically, I don't know if that really fits your essay, but it's unique....
Undergraduateanagaby17 - Dec 29, 2009 / determinedgirl - Dec 29, 2009
|'comfortable expressing one's opinion' - Haverford: Honor Code Essay
Undergraduateepirote901 - Dec 28, 2009 / EF_Susan - Dec 29, 2009
|BU supplement: Three words that describe me (dependable, obstinate, analyst)
4 - Hi, I'm glad you found my comments helpful :D I'm actually writing this essay too, so I know it's...
Undergraduatetuna624 - Dec 28, 2009 / onnanoko - Dec 29, 2009
|A. The quality of Rice's academic life and the Residential College System
2 - That is an important observation! The into and conclusion frame the essay and provide its structure. Topic sentences...
UndergraduatePlayerquadratic - Dec 28, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|" Volunteer, not so you can build your resume, but so you can build yourself"
2 - Yeah, likely story! At the start of the essay, making this assertion does not do any good, because...
Undergraduateletsgetfroyo - Dec 28, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
|"healing power of spontaneity" - NYU Supplement
UndergraduateIVSolomon - Dec 28, 2009 / Ivy_Equestrian - Dec 29, 2009
|Getting a Little-Bit Closer - Amherst Supplement Essay
Undergraduatemarkoni - Dec 28, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 29, 2009
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