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|Environmental Science class, Johns Hopkins Supplement Essay
3 - Teachers often discuss the potential to motivate students by taking them out of the classroom and exposing them...
UndergraduateZBurf - Dec 21, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 23, 2009
|"bridging the gap between Vietnam and the world" - Statement of Purpose
2 - Since I was young, I have often heard people's discussions about bridging the gap between Vietnam and the world,...
Undergraduatebeaming2 - Dec 21, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 23, 2009
|Commonapp essay:academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences
Undergraduateqianmeimei - Dec 22, 2009 / Esaias - Dec 23, 2009
|Famous New Yorker, Poem, 2050 movie... (NYU SUPPLEMENTS)
UndergraduateJamezy_d92 - Dec 22, 2009 / Notoman - Dec 23, 2009
|Uchicago extended essay on someone or something that has had an influence on you
2 - Huaxin, The general idea is good (paying attention to the scenery rather than just the destination). The idea...
UndergraduatelittleJ - Dec 23, 2009 / z4evafoolz - Dec 23, 2009
|UPenn Teacher's Autobiography '...with a loud bang, I toppled a pile of books'
5 - Thanks guys, all of these comments are invaluable. I just started editing my essay again and will make sure...
Undergraduatepbhat - Dec 22, 2009 / pbhat - Dec 23, 2009
|Common app short answer - research internship at a hospital
3 - this is definitely not descriptive enough, i don't really see the need for creativity. in other words, why was...
Undergraduatetaintedlove21 - Dec 22, 2009 / srandhawa - Dec 23, 2009
|Common App Short Answer + Essay: Indian dance + elderly caretaking job
4 - @ Politik: aw, thanks very much [: Yeahh, I like the idea of cutting out some description for something...
Undergraduatecolorfuloving - Dec 21, 2009 / colorfuloving - Dec 23, 2009
|Accounting - my reasons of transferring to State University
5 - Thank you all for your comments, suggestions and corrections on my essay. I really appreciate it! ABOVE is...
Undergraduateluckybella - Dec 21, 2009 / luckybella - Dec 23, 2009
|Something you pretend to hate but secretly like, or vice versa.
4 - Well, I am also dealing with this question for UVa painfully but have no results yet. I think u...
Undergraduatetimtebow - Dec 22, 2009 / Josephine0411 - Dec 23, 2009
|Howard Supplement - Topic of your Choice- My Aunt Barbara
Undergraduatetwizzlestraw - Dec 21, 2009 / olawunmi8 - Dec 22, 2009
|"Stay. I love you, but if it hurts to live, then go.", New to college essays
10 - This is really moving. Well, but since this is an essay that depicts the person with significant influence on...
Undergraduateasth3nia - Dec 16, 2009 / Josephine0411 - Dec 22, 2009
|"the endless pain of the ballet" - Common Application Main Essay
UndergraduateJosephine0411 - Dec 22, 2009 / Josephine0411 - Dec 22, 2009
|Tufts Supplement: I LOVE ROCK AND ROLL.
Undergraduatekrazzikittie - Dec 22, 2009 / krazzikittie - Dec 22, 2009
|Dickinson students shall become globally engaged citizen leaders
5 - This is a great essay! I love how you center you topic around the Israeli-Palestinian peace process. That...
Undergraduatejacob5642 - Dec 22, 2009 / pbhat - Dec 22, 2009
|Brown essay; why drawn to the academic fields you indicated
3 - obviously this is a very hard essay to do w/ 1000 characters(by the way im applying to brown also,...
Undergraduatesportybluei - Dec 22, 2009 / srandhawa - Dec 22, 2009
|John Hopkins Essay - Chemistry, The Combustion Reaction of My Knowledge
2 - While she continued to fill our minds with more cute analogies, and other students turned their attention to doodling,...
Undergraduatelowcal - Dec 21, 2009 / EF_Susan - Dec 22, 2009
|Stanford Essay: About me. Acting.
Undergraduateschmevie - Dec 15, 2009 / Alex728 - Dec 22, 2009
|Rice Supplement - what motivated you to come to Rice?
Undergraduatelowcal - Dec 21, 2009 / leemj308 - Dec 22, 2009
|"Memory" - Common Application Critique! my jet-black SLR camera
2 - ...juxtaposed against a background of my rivals between other competitors as my torso contorts itself over the barrier, each...
UndergraduatePsyched - Dec 21, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Extra Curricular ( Common App) 150 Word Response
3 - Let's not be so informal as to drop the word "during" when it is necessary: I joined the club...
Undergraduateedgardz21 - Dec 21, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|How Were You Caught? 'being caught into the politics'
6 - That first paragraph is quite impressive. I see some unnecessary stuff to be trimmed from paragraph 2, though: By...
Undergraduateedgardz21 - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|"Ding! Ding! Ding!" - for my common application essay on diversity
4 - To say that I was nervous would be an understatement; I was literally petrified; My guts were all tied...
Undergraduatesrahimi - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|tutoring programs and learning projects - UIUC Essay prompt
5 - Yes, I think the most impressive thing you can do is show that you are already being proactive about...
Undergraduatedemuredelight - Dec 16, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|'good body language' - SIGNIFICANT EXPERIENCE
Undergraduatesincerelyydavid - Dec 21, 2009 / missioncontrol - Dec 22, 2009
|Common App essay (the influence of my two little siblings)
3 - ...today it is extremely more hectic and entertaining. By thirteen I felt like I had landed the full-tim...
Undergraduatealejxa - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Option #2 for Yale Supplement Essay--God, Beauty, cousin Eve
4 - My little cousins are adorable. ---> just an idea to help draw the reader into the experience. It's...
Undergraduatesbrooks10 - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|enjoy most - music, performing for children
3 - Here is an idea for this excellent last sentence. This quality, this expression in my music, is not easily...
Undergraduatelilgangwolf - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|'superstition and unawareness' - Stanford Intellectual vitality- Disease
3 - ...was fought in history, I felt compelled was stimulated to look at how the modern 21st century responds to...
Undergraduatexxgraceanxx - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|'Academic standards / Indian roots' - University of Rochester short answer
5 - "I can only hope that I may be able to bring my experiences and knowledge to University of Rochester."...
Undergraduatenadine83 - Dec 19, 2009 / seivert9 - Dec 22, 2009
|"Coming to America" (How has your family influenced who you are)
5 - "No matter where you go, you must never forget where you came from, and the obstacles you have crossed....
UndergraduateJfils - Nov 19, 2009 / seivert9 - Dec 22, 2009
|"Mr. Bingley was only a fish" - Yale Supplement-any topic
Undergraduatesbrooks10 - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Common App: My Influences. My parent's greatest love was family.
4 - The way she deals with percentages would impress anybody in the field of mathematics and science. She gets lost...
Undergraduateschmevie - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Polytechnic Institute of NYU: Spend a day with an inventor. who, where and why?
UndergraduateJd87rh - Dec 16, 2009 / Jd87rh - Dec 22, 2009
|Rice's academic life, Road to Equality
4 - To this day, her smile reminds me of how, despite our contrasting lifestyles, we are equals. I feel that...
Undergraduatelowcal - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|If you are applying to the Pratt school of Engineering - why you want to study engineering at Duke?
4 - Engineering, I feel, will give me the knowledge needed to make a change. ---> well... this is rather vague....
Undergraduatethe17goose - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|The environmental field, Brown - what academic field are you interested in?
4 - This is especially appealing to me, because I am fascinated by lives other than my own. Another field that...
Undergraduatetimeturner36 - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Common Application Short Answer (Seeds of Peace)
4 - At Seeds of Peace Camp in summer 2001 Eleven teenagers from Bosnia, Croatia and Serbia criss-crossed their arms...
UndergraduateMona86 - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|NU- supplement why NU (a faculty to student ratio of 7 to 1)
6 - Because you end the first paragraph with this statement, it makes it seem like you are about to...
UndergraduateNUhopeful - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Never content with an "easy answer" - CMU commonapp supplement essay
4 - Good idea, Faisal! I did not think of talking out those unnecessary words at the start. I agree: It...
Undergraduatehoneyriceball - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Title: The Road Now Taken
3 - The aroma of the fresh out-of-the-oven brownies and the roar of the vacuum cleaning were all examples of what...
Undergraduatelowcal - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|'Asian in New York' - Cultural Differences Essay.
3 - The beginning of this has sme nice introspection, but I think you present yourself in too negative a light!...
Undergraduatebatmankiller - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|JHU Supplement- Why I chose to apply as Engineering Undecided
3 - I would use " " marks here: ---> The term "engineering" has become one which is used loosely and...
Undergraduatejoben222 - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|Residential school for underprivileged childen, common application essay option
UndergraduatePopcorn - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|"I want to study environmental engineering" - Johns Hopkins Supplement
3 - I think you can express a better aspiration than the aspiration to be widely known. Express an aspiration to...
UndergraduateRowa - Dec 20, 2009 / EF_Kevin - Dec 22, 2009
|a job as a newspaper carrier - Common Application short answer (Activity)
6 - Actually the tone isn't so negative. Don't worry! I just thought it would be better if you reworded or...
Undergraduatektcat4002 - Dec 22, 2009 / sportybluei - Dec 22, 2009
|Common App Essay- Own Topic: "Who I Am and What I came from."
2 - ^When you first talk about a phenomenon, are you referring to your friends getting a haircut? ...
Undergraduatejimmjacks12 - Dec 21, 2009 / Liebe - Dec 22, 2009
|SUNY Buffalo & Plattsburgh - Dreams and Goals
5 - Well, thanks for the suggestions. I mailed the essay the other day. And yes, most parents don't just...
Undergraduateraven - Dec 17, 2009 / raven - Dec 22, 2009
|UNC Essay - Which terms suit best to describe me as a person and my whole life?
Undergraduatecoreync - Dec 16, 2009 / coreync - Dec 22, 2009
|Emory- how will it help me grow?
Undergraduateangie127 - Oct 27, 2009 / Josephine0411 - Dec 22, 2009
|things that even tenaciousness and dedication can't solve, Harvard Supplementary
4 - i really like the imagery you use! Undoubtedly, if I'd had a little more knowledge of draftsmanship going...
UndergraduateNandra - Dec 21, 2009 / anhammond - Dec 22, 2009
|Perfect School Balance - Northwestern Statement
8 - you essay is really wonderful but i also agree with zuluyan. there's no answer to that question....
Undergraduateganadara000 - Nov 29, 2009 / ginny2345 - Dec 22, 2009
|An Essay on Family. UC essay
2 - I liked your essay. However you can take it a level further by making the dialogues more interesting....
UndergraduateZuluYaN - Dec 22, 2009 / ashehryar - Dec 22, 2009
|MMSS program, Why Northwestern?
3 - To correct a few points: First, though NU does good in developing the intimacy between students and profs....
Undergraduatejunbotheone - Dec 19, 2009 / ZuluYaN - Dec 22, 2009
|Northwestern Supplement - Why Northwestern?
Undergraduatetimeturner36 - Dec 20, 2009 / ZuluYaN - Dec 22, 2009
|Northwestern supplement:: "A second chance"
6 - It definitely had some touching spots. Story of your home country You may consider the following tips: ...
Undergraduateginny2345 - Dec 21, 2009 / ZuluYaN - Dec 22, 2009
|Admissions Essay "Shedding Old Skin"
2 - This is quite the interesting essay! In fact, its like nothing I have ever seen before. But, I...
Undergraduateashehryar - Dec 21, 2009 / pbhat - Dec 22, 2009
|Growing up with two religions
NEW - San Francisco: a cultural mecca where religions coincide and ideas explode into being. Most of my friends and I...
Undergraduatekeilinger - Dec 22, 2009 / — -
|Sparked (a personal change from adolescence to maturity) - common app essay
Undergraduatecdrappi - Dec 21, 2009 / Nandra - Dec 22, 2009
|A lifetime engagement in research ----Duke engineering supplement
Undergraduateswirl92 - Dec 21, 2009 / mmmargarita - Dec 21, 2009
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