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|Georgetown Transfer Essay: Asian American Identity Crisis
2 - Hello dendenkim, pretty good essay but as EF_Sheri said do not over use the humor on your essay otherwise...
Undergraduatedendenkim - Feb 25, 2015 / Barrera77 - Mar 2, 2015
|That day was shocking to many people, everything happened so slowly
2 - Hi Cmcontin! I'm EF_Season and I'm here to help you with your Descriptive essay today. First, I'd love to...
Undergraduatecmcontin - Mar 2, 2015 / EF_Season - Mar 2, 2015
|Reach an outstanding employment prospect to major financial institutions - liberal arts colleges
8 - It means a short introduction, such as a personal experience. BTW, I just posted my edited version, could you...
UndergraduateLoveNYU - Feb 28, 2015 / LoveNYU - Mar 1, 2015
|Procrastination is a terrible, terrible technique for self induced anxiety. Would not recommend.
Undergraduatedendenkim - Mar 1, 2015 / dendenkim - Mar 1, 2015
|My mom is my real teacher; "If you grow up what will you do?"
UndergraduateInaa_e - Mar 1, 2015 / EF_Jasmine - Mar 1, 2015
|My first escapade in the realm of psychology was unintentional - UT Major Transfer Essay
2 - HI sousuke! I hope I'm not too late to help. I'm EF_Season. I'll respond now... Even if it is...
Undergraduatesousuke - Feb 28, 2015 / EF_Season - Mar 1, 2015
|I see many opportunities to achieve my end goal of learning all I can. Brown Univ.
2 - As a woman who has just started experiencing the world, I see many opportunities to achieve my end goal...
Undergraduatezasif326 - Feb 28, 2015 / EF_Season - Mar 1, 2015
|I am not afraid of the future anymore. I fell in love instantly with graphic design; admission essay
Undergraduatesardigt - Feb 28, 2015 / sardigt - Mar 1, 2015
|Interest in particle physics lead me to decision to apply to University of Glasgow - transfer essay
2 - In the second class of high school (not exactly sure what this means, do you mean your second year...
UndergraduateShilay - Feb 28, 2015 / dendenkim - Mar 1, 2015
|Brown University carries my top choice of major: Development Studies.
3 - Brown University carries my top choice of major I think "meets " is a better word. Although it is...
Undergraduatezasif326 - Feb 28, 2015 / vahid11 - Feb 28, 2015
|It is agonizing to watch such a beautiful country crumble because of the rising violence. UT Austin.
3 - You have very good use of imagery; your essay was captivating throughout. I agree with TJLuschen's suggestions....
Undergraduateyoungfolk2 - Feb 27, 2015 / zasif326 - Feb 28, 2015
|"Your account has been deleted. We hope you come back soon," Facebook said
2 - This was an interesting read but also very generic and predictable. People know pretty much exactly what happens when...
Undergraduateamei_mei - Feb 27, 2015 / zasif326 - Feb 28, 2015
|FROM 4 LEGS TO 2! How Veterinary medicine led me to Nursing.
Undergraduatelelooloo - Feb 26, 2015 / lelooloo - Feb 27, 2015
|Where words or actions are not able to produce. Parsons The New School Artist Statement revision.
5 - I am not a native speaker, and I'm far from painting, so very carefully I'll try to discuss your...
UndergraduateWDantigua - Jan 29, 2015 / autumn_waltz - Feb 27, 2015
|No two persons ever read the same book - TEXAS A&M topic A essay
Undergraduatedwwiratama - Feb 26, 2015 / WDantigua - Feb 26, 2015
|the prestigious learning environment - Temple University's excellent resources
2 - Hello! My edits and revisions are below: When I think of Temple University, the aspect that (is the...
UndergraduateRawoyera - Feb 26, 2015 / EF_Jasmine - Feb 26, 2015
|'genetics is the subset of biology' - why Columbia? "Broadening scientific horizons"
2 - Hi junersol194! Yes, overall the response is great--only a few areas that can be improved. I've made suggestions below....
Undergraduatejungersol194 - Feb 24, 2015 / EF_Sheri - Feb 26, 2015
|Peace Corps Essay "Most Likely to Live in Another Country - 8th Grade Me"
2 - Hi macook3! I'm EF_Season and I'm here to help you with your essay today. First, I LOVE the way...
Undergraduatemacook3 - Feb 24, 2015 / EF_Season - Feb 24, 2015
|Hospitality Entrance Essay - What Qualities needed to succeed.
Undergraduateblah87 - Feb 23, 2015 / blah87 - Feb 24, 2015
|Practical exercise is necessary to reduce a gap between industry and educational institution
4 - Hi again, Masktaz. When EF_Jasmine, writes "run-on," she means a sentence that needs punctuation (or needs to be...
Undergraduatemasktaz - Feb 21, 2015 / EF_Season - Feb 23, 2015
|Helping an Old Man; College Admissions- Better Person
Undergraduatekgarneau21 - Sep 11, 2013 / tantadedanaan - Feb 22, 2015
|"I thrive where I am constantly inspired" - UT Austin TRANSFER APP - Lifelong friendships
3 - Thanks so much for the critique! I'll definitely revise my essay taking your points into consideration!...
UndergraduateAnumeha - Feb 21, 2015 / Anumeha - Feb 21, 2015
|She stared at the mirror intently; CHALLENGE ESSAY
2 - The question is to state a challenging experience I have faced and explain what I have learned from it....
Undergraduatedlwjd - Feb 15, 2014 / EF_Jasmine - Feb 21, 2015
|'Over the metal door, there is a world of darkness and silence' - describe your place essay
Undergraduatejeon - Feb 20, 2015 / jeon - Feb 20, 2015
|Shortcomings is not a limit / Geophysical Engineering - Student Conference Application
4 - Great job expanding on what you've learned! Just a quick tweak, and I think you'll be in good...
Undergraduatemasktaz - Feb 20, 2015 / EF_Alyssa - Feb 20, 2015
|Exploration Manager is my way to contribute in global energy issues
Undergraduatemasktaz - Feb 19, 2015 / masktaz - Feb 20, 2015
|I have learned not to give up, keep trying and learn from my mistakes
Undergraduatebillythegoat - Sep 5, 2013 / Vns9x - Feb 19, 2015
|I was working as a Supervisor of Information Unit in the training and community service center
3 - Thank you Dear Vns9x I updated your suggestions: "I am one of those who interested and aspiring to get...
Undergraduatesami201 - Feb 19, 2015 / sami201 - Feb 19, 2015
|I was always taught to write what I know and put my experiences in a way others could relate to
4 - as far as i know, you can put a powerful quote (from an important figure) that relates to the...
Undergraduatedisaacs38 - Feb 18, 2015 / karchkarch - Feb 18, 2015
|"Inventories can be managed, but people must be led." Essay on Leadership
3 - Hi, I agree with Vns9x's comments. Here are some other comments: "Inventories can be managed, but people must...
Undergraduatemasktaz - Feb 16, 2015 / TJLuschen - Feb 18, 2015
|Bard College Berlin transfer - how becoming bilingual changed my life
2 - Hello! First, to answer your question about the length. If the minimum is 250 words, ideally I would try...
Undergraduateseaweed77 - Feb 13, 2015 / EF_Sheri - Feb 17, 2015
|Embrace anything and everything - even unexpected
2 - Hello Dear, I would like to take the opportunity to provide you feedback on your answer. First of all,...
Undergraduatewonderland - Feb 15, 2015 / budhesh28 - Feb 17, 2015
|Disappointment with an initial dream school, a dreary social life, homesickness, and pricey colleges
2 - Hi there! I think your essay was very good. You elaborate your reasons and objectives very well. As...
Undergraduatelacy - Feb 16, 2015 / tantadedanaan - Feb 16, 2015
|'I always perceive the grass was greener on the other side' - UW-Madison
2 - Overall, the tone of the essay is unlikely to resonate well with the person who will be reviewing. It...
Undergraduatewertypoiuys - Feb 13, 2015 / EF_Sheri - Feb 15, 2015
|The transition is frightening, really. However, I remain unchanged.
Undergraduatewonderland - Feb 14, 2015 / Dev4444 - Feb 15, 2015
|"Inquiry and knowledge have always guided me..." - Queen's PSE Engineering
2 - "At Queen's University, I will expand upon these skills further inwith the help of my academic and extracurricular activities."...
Undergraduatejcamp - Feb 14, 2015 / wonderland - Feb 15, 2015
|Becoming the Girl I've Always Wanted To Be--Common App Transfer Essay
2 - Your essay should have opening paragraph and ending one to show the readers what you want to say and...
UndergraduateSparkle5506 - Feb 13, 2015 / hunhann - Feb 14, 2015
|Switzerland is the place where I want to study. Study plan for Glion Higher School of Education.
2 - Hi, overall your essay sounded a little unorganized. You seem to go back and forth from topic to topic...
UndergraduateSamSegal - Feb 11, 2015 / TJLuschen - Feb 14, 2015
|Time is my biggest fear. It goes but never comes. It flies but never slows SCAD Statement of Purpose
2 - Your story is quite touching Davies. It is enough to tug on the heart strings of the admissions officers...
UndergraduateSadieLady - Feb 13, 2015 / vangiespen - Feb 13, 2015
|Everything started from computer for my eldest brother - My Devotion to technology
UndergraduateMisael - Feb 11, 2015 / Vns9x - Feb 11, 2015
|A Responsible Citizen - Creative Personal Statement
Undergraduateaber96crombie - Feb 11, 2015 / TJLuschen - Feb 11, 2015
|Sparky - the friend that changes the way I perceive things. University of Wisconsin-Madison essay
3 - Alright, thanks for your honest opinion, I'm also hesitating whether to submit this essay or not, time to revamp...
Undergraduatewertypoiuy - Feb 8, 2015 / wertypoiuy - Feb 11, 2015
|"You've got a great road ahead, sweetheart" - Transfer essays for MIT
3 - Thank you very much! I've edited the first one a bit: "You've got a great road ahead, sweetheart," my...
UndergraduateKaterynaPS - Feb 9, 2015 / KaterynaPS - Feb 11, 2015
|Why Don't I Have Baby Pictures? - essay about experience in my life
2 - Hi I enjoyed reading your essay :) and the following just represents my own opinion: On that Thursday morning,...
UndergraduateDavieThao - Feb 9, 2015 / Anonymous630 - Feb 11, 2015
|Taekwondo has changed my life completely!
2 - Hello Daniel, its nice to see a foreigner so devoted in my countries sport! (Yes, I am Korean) I...
Undergraduatemrdanny090 - Feb 10, 2015 / kibz95 - Feb 10, 2015
|An Unbreakable Bond - the loss of a friend can destroy a life and change someone's perspective
Undergraduateuhlizza - Feb 10, 2015 / uhlizza - Feb 10, 2015
|Be ambitious in my dreams and daring in my actions -- Queen's Commerce SE
3 - Hi Jennifer, I appreciate your suggestions very much!:） The thing is that I find it hard to describe the...
UndergraduateAnonymous630 - Feb 10, 2015 / Anonymous630 - Feb 10, 2015
|Exploring the hills of Himalayas in the North to vast beaches of the south - undergraduate course
NEW - In a 400-500 word essay, please describe how your personal experience and your cultural heritage have shaped the person...
Undergraduatehscmeinme - Feb 10, 2015 / — -
|"Being different to make a difference"-U of Washington Int. Transfer Personal Statement
3 - Hi Jenny, thank you for your helpful feedback. 1. Honestly, my statement should be "I used to dread...
Undergraduateanthonysw - Feb 4, 2015 / anthonysw - Feb 10, 2015
|I was probably one of the most timid person in high school. UCLA Supplement Essay #2
2 - From reading this, you have an "OK" essay so far as to submit for your special circumstances. But if...
Undergraduatebbennett97 - Feb 8, 2015 / DavieThao - Feb 9, 2015
|It is an honor if I can give a hand to celebrate 100 years establishment ceremony of business school
Undergraduatelnguyen67 - Feb 7, 2015 / EF_Kevin - Feb 7, 2015
|I'm particularly interested in quantum physics - Summer Science Program Short Answers
4 - Thank you so much!!!! Sorry to tag this thread as Graduate. This is actually an application for a high...
Undergraduate970146hc - Feb 5, 2015 / 970146hc - Feb 6, 2015
|My Father taught me the meaning of generosity, the importance of excellence and the value of honesty
UndergraduateBenzerk - Feb 5, 2015 / Benzerk - Feb 5, 2015
|Gymnastics and I - 'Lunch never failed to make my stomach ache with butterflies'
Undergraduatesrose - Feb 3, 2015 / srose - Feb 4, 2015
|Everyone has a strength and a weakness - a superpower (mine is perseverance) and a kryptonite
3 - You don't really provide support for your opening paragraph. I would recommend adding more specific examples. Over all, it...
Undergraduatemarissa - Jan 23, 2015 / srose - Feb 3, 2015
|Making the world a better place, even for the underprivileged drives - why I chose this program?
Undergraduatealiredha - Feb 2, 2015 / aliredha - Feb 3, 2015
|'early desire to visit beautiful places' - Study Abroad Personal Expectations, and why Hong Kong?
NEW - Please address the following in an approximately 750 word personal statement: - What are your personal expectations for study...
Undergraduatexnightly - Feb 3, 2015 / — -
|Johns Hopkins additional essay: Why JHU? - because of it fame and its industrious envrionment
3 - Thank you for your last comment. I have just revised my essay. Please take a look Johns Hopkins University...
Undergraduatemyngoc311 - Jan 29, 2015 / myngoc311 - Feb 2, 2015
|'countless educational programs offered' - Education among the American society - UT Transfer essay
7 - here is a revision of the opening paragraph and the fourth paragraph (states what needs to be changed): ...
UndergraduateAndrewB - Jan 23, 2015 / AndrewB - Feb 2, 2015
|Chemistry sparked my first friendship - Johns Hopkins University essay
6 - Ngoc, there is just something uncomfortable about the way your essay reads. It seems like it is trying too...
Undergraduatemyngoc311 - Jan 26, 2015 / vangiespen - Feb 2, 2015
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