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|What can the study of animals tell us about ourselves and the world we live in? Improvements seeking
5 - Thank you!...
UndergraduateWaz147 - Jun 12, 2015 / Waz147 - Jun 13, 2015
|Camden, a city of poverty, violence.. - PERSONAL STATEMENT
4 - Dear Jailene1026, have 1 note for you: Growing up in Camden, a city of poverty, violence, teen pregnancies...
UndergraduateJailene1026 - Jun 7, 2015 / Anna Davis - Jun 11, 2015
|Seeking admission to one of the best Computer Science undergraduate programs in India - SOP
3 - kaushal21, i think that in the first paragraph instead of which is to be a software engineer , you...
Undergraduatekaushal21 - May 30, 2015 / Anna Davis - Jun 11, 2015
|Assignment about Culture Shock when you come to America.
Undergraduatevchau254 - May 12, 2015 / juanmarman - Jun 10, 2015
|My trip to the land of opportunities! I am not afraid of challenges anymore.
Undergraduatealialkhazragi - May 25, 2015 / alialkhazragi - Jun 7, 2015
|George Washington High School Drum Corps - personal quality, talent
Undergraduatehahaha - Nov 28, 2008 / thutyedaniel - May 29, 2015
|One thing I learned from our band - Dont be ugly Wallpaper - C. Gottesman 2015
3 - Thank you I'm still learning as a writer. I wrote it shorter than usual because the prompt said it...
UndergraduateMayaAngelou - May 25, 2015 / MayaAngelou - May 26, 2015
|My most memorable holidays
UndergraduateNatyAC - May 19, 2015 / ChristineB - May 20, 2015
|'Continuation of family legacy' - AUC, American University Of Cairo
Undergraduateislamtorky - May 19, 2015 / ChristineB - May 19, 2015
|'my Filipino ethnicity' - Culture and a Central Identity - CommonApp Essay
UndergraduateNJBorst - May 17, 2015 / justivy03 - May 19, 2015
|Biology and the single child in my Chinese Family; The world I come from
2 - I have made some suggestions. I looked at each sentence and paragraph to see what changes needed to be...
Undergraduatett6746690 - Oct 30, 2013 / lcturn87 - May 18, 2015
|Resiliency is something I've had to learn quickly growing up
2 - JenniferB, The fundamentals of your essay are great. You've selected some very big challenges to highlight your resiliency,...
UndergraduateJenniferB - May 17, 2015 / ChristineB - May 17, 2015
|The breakout of the civil war - the time my life has changed
3 - thanks jasmine for the corrections and the advice. it is good to know your weaknesses so that you can...
Undergraduatelee boy - May 13, 2015 / lee boy - May 14, 2015
|How I became interested in becoming a Physician Assistant-Saint Francis application essay
2 - - Rephrasing last 2 sentences; This experience furthered my interest in becoming a Physician Assistant because of the...
Undergraduatemadilyn123 - Oct 31, 2013 / justivy03 - May 13, 2015
|The beauty in numbers like the beauty in art frames - Texas A&M Transfer Essay A
UndergraduateAlexMenendez - May 10, 2015 / justivy03 - May 10, 2015
|'Going The Extra Mile' - Sophie Davis Essay #1
2 - I am new to UnderGrad Essays but one thing I learned is: The Admission Committee asks the essay so...
Undergraduateegpctim - Jan 8, 2012 / AlexMenendez - May 10, 2015
|What is the distinctness between a traditional Vietnamese family and a modern one?
Undergraduatepnanh - May 7, 2015 / pnanh - May 7, 2015
|Peace Corps Volunteer Essay Statement; how to overcome the various challenges associated?
2 - Although, I was fortunate enough to be given the opportunity to move to a country where I was able...
UndergraduateBlack_Beauty381 - May 5, 2015 / confusee123 - May 6, 2015
|I discovered the core of strength within myself that survived all hurt. My childhood.
4 - I had to rearrange you paragraphs again, because adding the other information about the neighborhood should not be placed...
Undergraduatesherricecharles - May 1, 2015 / lcturn87 - May 2, 2015
|My uncommon path - I'm ready to return to UCF now
4 - Continued... After my disqualification in 2012, I got married, and, with the help of my dear husband, slowly...
Undergraduatebluefleed - Apr 30, 2015 / ChristineB - Apr 30, 2015
|Nowadays, it cannot be avoided that the number of people gets the weight increase in many countries
3 - Hello Amelia, I might sound very rude, but your essay is quite... confusing. Befuddling. First, I would like to...
UndergraduateAdhisti - Apr 29, 2015 / kibz95 - Apr 30, 2015
|'My friend forever' - give some words about someone you know well
2 - I think your essay is basically well written, but you need to pay more attention to word choice. ...
Undergraduateamit agrawal - Apr 29, 2015 / EF_Carol - Apr 29, 2015
|"Why do you choose Pharmacy?" - Personal Statement for Monash Uni
3 - Thank you so much, ChristineB. Your correction really helps me while editing my personal statement....
UndergraduateGiantonia - Apr 27, 2015 / Giantonia - Apr 28, 2015
|'joining the band as a percussionist' - it is how I solved my conflict
2 - Hi, notblake. I'm going to rearrange things a little to improve your essay: Throughout my life as a...
Undergraduatenotblake - Apr 26, 2015 / ChristineB - Apr 26, 2015
|"the world gets a lot bigger when you're living small" - Peace Corps Essay
2 - I think you did a good job summing up your experience that would make you good candidate. Your work...
Undergraduatetempledc - Apr 25, 2015 / EF_Carol - Apr 26, 2015
|Acceptance to my dream career. I am extremely excited and ready for this new chapter in my family.
Undergraduateperlamartinez5 - Apr 23, 2015 / perlamartinez5 - Apr 23, 2015
|I AM A LEADER - it's my best trait
3 - I think you should add more or state specific examples. When I read this, I think that you have...
Undergraduatetonythatrican - Apr 23, 2015 / lcturn87 - Apr 23, 2015
|UC Davis' resources and research opportunities will give me a solid foundation in programming.
UndergraduateGModesto - Apr 22, 2015 / lcturn87 - Apr 22, 2015
|Is cheating wrong? Quotes of Sophocles and Susannah Centlivre
2 - Therefore, is cheating acceptable as just a normal way of life or is it plain out wrong and never...
UndergraduateKprizzy - Apr 22, 2015 / EF_Carol - Apr 22, 2015
|The public library (contemporary issue/problem) Richmond Scholar Semifinalist essay
2 - 1) 1st paragraph: I think there is too much information in the second sentence. Although there is little that...
Undergraduatebeccaleelee - Jan 16, 2011 / lcturn87 - Apr 20, 2015
|Combination of intellectual and professional growth; Vassar Colleg Supp/Why Vassar?
2 - Hi, orlaendoe. Here are my corrections to your essay: HOW DID YOU LEARN ABOUT VASSAR AND WHAT ASPECTS...
Undergraduateorlaendoe - Dec 26, 2012 / ChristineB - Apr 19, 2015
|Why do you wish to study Computer Science? What influenced your decision?
Undergraduatekimtot - Apr 17, 2015 / EF_Jasmine - Apr 17, 2015
|SVA Statement of Intent - Getting out of the Shadows
4 - 1) What are you referring to when you state that your cousin is better than you? Does the rivalry...
Undergraduatethebadguy - Apr 16, 2015 / lcturn87 - Apr 17, 2015
|My future goals - what to do in the future is a decision for the rest of our life
Undergraduatefederica15 - Apr 15, 2015 / federica15 - Apr 17, 2015
|KAIST personal statement - O & A level results.
5 - Thank you for the suggestion. I have written the answer to the prompts above. Will you please give some...
Undergraduatemahfuzx10 - Apr 8, 2015 / mahfuzx10 - Apr 16, 2015
|A simple engineering admission essay . AUC: What would you benefit from studying in our university.
2 - There is a misspelling of enquiries. It is spelled inquiries. Also, delete here and there. What do you anticipate...
UndergraduateAmahrous - Apr 14, 2015 / lcturn87 - Apr 14, 2015
|Hamid-ur-Rehamn ; Common App/ Person who had influence
2 - I'm going to help you with your paper paragraph by paragraph in order. 1st paragraph: Put just a...
UndergraduateAryanK - Dec 30, 2012 / lcturn87 - Apr 14, 2015
|What does it mean to be cultured? Texas A&M essay
UndergraduateJstuff36 - Nov 26, 2011 / lcturn87 - Apr 13, 2015
|'Leaving home at the age of 16' - Common App Essay
3 - Change your tense. You are speaking in the past. Change have never to never and will to would. If...
Undergraduateverca - Sep 2, 2012 / lcturn87 - Apr 13, 2015
|Where is Waldo Really - CU Essay requirement.
2 - Odgie, once you get this few tips, proof read your essay again and make it habit, PROOF READING is...
UndergraduateOdgie - Dec 27, 2012 / justivy03 - Apr 13, 2015
|Crime in Mexico - some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern
3 - Hi @animber..I think there are many grammatical issues and misspelling. This I have several corrections for you. ...
Undergraduateanimber - Apr 8, 2015 / intiaiqbal92 - Apr 9, 2015
|Reed offers variety and exposure - and that's what made me a great scholar, not specialization
UndergraduatePegasus - Apr 3, 2015 / lcturn87 - Apr 6, 2015
|My strenghts are: self-motivation, analytical mind and a strong-work ethic - who am I as a person?
2 - The first two sentences are weakness and strengths because you are trying to figure out who you are but...
Undergraduatededeebabi101 - Apr 5, 2015 / lcturn87 - Apr 6, 2015
|My mom put a lot of effort teaching me manners, how to be respectful, determinant and full of life.
3 - Thanks for your respond Alina ... I'm Admitting to to the "University of the people" and this is one...
Undergraduatemanar21abc - Apr 5, 2015 / manar21abc - Apr 6, 2015
|"You may play well or you may play badly; the important thing is that you should play truly" - NYU
2 - Hello abhayarathore, This is some correction for your writing. These words by Mikhail Shchepkin "You may play well...
Undergraduateabhayarathore - Apr 1, 2015 / IqbalThemi - Apr 3, 2015
|Chance. When you get one, you're going to want to use it wisely. Why the UMTC PSEO Program?
2 - I think it's easier on the reader's mind when you use "I" instead of "you". Using "you" is subtly...
Undergraduatemohamtes000 - Mar 30, 2015 / EF_Kevin - Apr 1, 2015
|'I was building robots' - UMASS Mechanical Engineering Common App Transfer Essay
Undergraduateshermama96 - Mar 30, 2015 / johnsenong - Apr 1, 2015
|The people I see nearly every day are unable to access the education that they deserve
2 - It's interesting, the teachers would complain that they have to let their ideals and curricula conform to the...
UndergraduateCollegeBoy - Mar 28, 2015 / EF_Kevin - Mar 30, 2015
|Motivation letter for International Business Administration at Rotterdam School of Management
2 - I think you did a marvelous job talking about your personal discovery experience, and how you came to be...
Undergraduatesamaskarkapac - Mar 29, 2015 / EF_Carol - Mar 30, 2015
|I can offer NYU my patient perspective because of my experience in Xiamen, not so big city in China.
6 - Thank you again for your quick response! So you suggest I should stick to the new version and...
UndergraduateChenchenchen - Mar 27, 2015 / Chenchenchen - Mar 28, 2015
|DePauw has helped me progress, but now I want to move even further. Transfer main essay to NYU!
Undergraduatechan94 - Mar 28, 2015 / harveyross - Mar 28, 2015
|Engineering in supporting my financial issues - Personal statement correction
UndergraduateIraj33 - Mar 27, 2015 / ah_zafari - Mar 27, 2015
|Being a president of English club I organized a summer exchange trip to Lithuania; cultural exchange
2 - Hi there! I know you're excited about the possibilities with NYU. It's an amazing institution. :) One of...
Undergraduatenazmarta - Mar 25, 2015 / EF_Sheri - Mar 25, 2015
|My mother's dedication inspired me to set high goals to make her proud. My international background.
NEW - Please provide a statement that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve. You can...
Undergraduatenazmarta - Mar 25, 2015 / — -
|LIBRARY: SECOND HOME (QUESTBRIDGE SHORT RESPONSE)
Undergraduaterettabby - Mar 25, 2015 / rettabby - Mar 25, 2015
|Through medicine people's lives are prolonged - Career Goals of an Emergency Room Physician
Undergraduatejaylon - Mar 23, 2015 / jaylon - Mar 24, 2015
|'Academics, bookwork, school' - Quest Bridge Biographical Essay
3 - After seeing the struggles my mother goeswent through in order for me to have a better future, I made...
Undergraduatek9chilly - Sep 24, 2012 / lynzee22 - Mar 23, 2015
|'scientific research is strongly promoted here' - Macalester supplement
3 - Hello, This is a very good start. Below are some suggestions For a liberal arts college with high...
Undergraduatecordyceps - Jan 15, 2012 / lynzee22 - Mar 23, 2015
|Korean universities, culture, and technology. My passion to continue my study.
Undergraduatetian lee - Mar 23, 2015 / EF_Kevin - Mar 23, 2015
|Motive for exchange program in Japan - to broaden my horizon
2 - Hello! I hope you get to have excellent, rewarding experiences when you apply your art for ECE. That is...
Undergraduateerinwu - Mar 22, 2015 / EF_Kevin - Mar 23, 2015
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