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|Inspirtaion to pursue engineering- U of T Essay- This opportunity means the world to me
2 - ... This section lacks creativity :( ... These sound like statements you made without much commitment. Talk through...
UndergraduateElmYew - Feb 9, 2014 / dumi - Feb 9, 2014
|"I love the challenge" My International Baccalaureate Entrance Essay
UndergraduateJackie2012 - Feb 8, 2014 / leoking - Feb 8, 2014
|My Bedroom - Common App Essay: A Meaningful Environment
Undergraduatekimnvth - Jan 27, 2014 / kimnvth - Feb 8, 2014
|Financial Analysis and Risk Management; Waterloo / educational goals,
2 - Just a few suggestions which I think would read better. :) good luck fascinated by I regard it as...
Undergraduatebetty999 - Feb 7, 2014 / niz1128 - Feb 8, 2014
|NUS ADMISSION ESSAY---> Torn between arts and science.
4 - I decided to follow my heart and choose something that interested me instead of following the norm for...
Undergraduateniz1128 - Feb 5, 2014 / halleybachelor - Feb 7, 2014
|DIPLOMACY; UT Austin Statement of Purpose - transfer essay
3 - In the pursuit of my dreams of becoming a diplomat or working for the government in the capacity...
Undergraduateutaustin - Feb 6, 2014 / dumi - Feb 7, 2014
|Art institure application essay for graphic and web design
3 - I really do feel like its writers block im suffering from. Thank you for your advice! Ill try rewriting...
Undergraduatemari_zelda - Feb 5, 2014 / mari_zelda - Feb 6, 2014
|How should we react with an exchange opportunity? ; U.S. Perspectives essay tips
2 - "These characteristics provide students with a large range of point of views, and the chance to develop new technologies....
UndergraduateTales - Feb 5, 2014 / snroewms - Feb 6, 2014
|'ideas turned into reality' Engineering application Essay - University of Toronto
UndergraduateKaranarak - Feb 5, 2014 / Pahan - Feb 5, 2014
|"Reason over emotion"; Programme preference - City University, why?
8 - Good start :) This aspect makes me embrace the scienceScience. Ok, Pahan's got a very good point...
UndergraduateUtau4928 - Dec 29, 2013 / dumi - Feb 4, 2014
|My only task was to get good grades; UW Madison
6 - Avoid using contractions. I am, not I'm. Was not not wasn't. Pay attention to capitalization. UW Madison should...
UndergraduateAlberto53 - Jan 30, 2014 / Ulaai - Feb 4, 2014
|I was always disappointed by the schools I attended; "Why REED?"
4 - From eight thousand miles away, the little I could gather about Reed made me beliefbelieve(no comma) it was my...
UndergraduateRiyasat - Jan 18, 2014 / dumi - Feb 4, 2014
|"Stop crying," I begged silently; CENTRAL TO IDENTITY
2 - I'd tend not to get into a discussion about content on a sensitive topic. Usually, I would point out...
Undergraduatemoviemix - Feb 4, 2014 / Mustafa1991 - Feb 4, 2014
|Texas A&M Transfer Essay Technology Management - SOP
2 - Absent a prompt, one cannot give effective feedback concerning how well your essay conforms to the applicable scope....
UndergraduateStereoT - Feb 3, 2014 / Mustafa1991 - Feb 3, 2014
|Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison
UndergraduateLora Elle - Feb 3, 2014 / eddies - Feb 3, 2014
|"The Road Not Taken"; Why Dickinson?
2 - Outstanding essay! Really. I did not notice anything major, according to what I feel that are major errors. I...
Undergraduatethenewdude - Feb 2, 2014 / Cl0ark0 - Feb 3, 2014
|5-year study, sponsored by Big Brothers & Sisters; UT's Essay on Issue of Importance Help
2 - My five-year study sponsored by Big Brothers Big Sister Canada, made me realize that children would be more...
Undergraduatedgh2794 - Feb 2, 2014 / Pahan - Feb 3, 2014
|Engineering - University of Toronto - "As I journeyed thorough life"
4 - Essay 1: You tend to repeat many words. Like 'science and math' repeated in three sentences subsequently. And...
Undergraduatecoolsday - Jan 24, 2014 / Ulaai - Feb 3, 2014
|Nursing Admissions Essay-How will becoming a nurse help you to make a difference in lives?
4 - I redid my essay to be more personal. It's not edited at all so there will be mistakes. Thanks...
Undergraduateminty93 - Feb 2, 2014 / minty93 - Feb 2, 2014
|I'm a Prince not Cinderella... Need Encouragement - community college transfer student
2 - Your essay is very good! I think the only comment I would have is to have change this sentence...
UndergraduateRRD1215 - Feb 1, 2014 / minty93 - Feb 2, 2014
|I had just moved to Canada a few weeks ago; How you overcame a challenge...
5 - just signing my name here to avoid plagiarism issues... Author: C M Basharat Ul Hedayet Saint Mary's University...
Undergraduatedextro590 - Jan 31, 2014 / dextro590 - Feb 2, 2014
|Fighting a fire in a street market (Groupwork Experience)
Undergraduatedextro590 - Feb 1, 2014 / dextro590 - Feb 2, 2014
|I hated the thought of having to get up every morning; central to your identity.
Undergraduatealexx17 - Jan 13, 2014 / dumi - Feb 2, 2014
|Statement of Purpose -- why KAIST? "to face AFTA 2015."
3 - It is a question that always crosses my mind every once a whiletimeas I am spending my time asI...
UndergraduateUlaai - Feb 1, 2014 / dumi - Feb 2, 2014
|Gaming World"; University of Michigan - Community/ Unique qualities
2 - I've developed friendships which have lasted several years and still continue todayto date. You've presented this nicely....
UndergraduateTheStudent101 - Feb 1, 2014 / dumi - Feb 2, 2014
|My friend was diagnosed with Leukemia; UBC- Experience / Activity
Undergraduatebecky1 - Feb 1, 2014 / dumi - Feb 2, 2014
|My Life changed abruptly / CU Boulder Application essay
UndergraduateLarso1408 - Feb 1, 2014 / Larso1408 - Feb 1, 2014
|Reflections on military Veterans ; UW-Madison
5 - here is an example of how you could cut down words, and keep things concise: I was working as...
Undergraduateredy4c0llege - Jan 30, 2014 / taimisk - Feb 1, 2014
|DRAW!!! ; Admission Essay- Ryerson
Undergraduatejbrizzy - Jan 30, 2014 / dextro590 - Feb 1, 2014
|'stock trading' UBC- Significant Challenge and what you learned in the process?
Undergraduatekentherabbit - Feb 1, 2014 / dextro590 - Feb 1, 2014
|Personal statement for UW Bothell (CS major, undocumented student)
Undergraduateyauheniya89 - Jan 31, 2014 / yauheniya89 - Feb 1, 2014
|Poverty in a third world country is not kind to anyone; Background/ Central to Identity
9 - Urgent: I need a reply within 3 hours to meet my uMich deadline. Is my revision better than my...
Undergraduateabacada - Jan 27, 2014 / abacada - Feb 1, 2014
|I will do everything I can to fully maximize my university experience; Queens PS
4 - I would also explore the opportunities for international exposure like exchange or volunteering abroad. Being a...
Undergraduatemmec - Jan 10, 2014 / dumi - Feb 1, 2014
|USC Supplement Essays for a hopeful computer science and business administration major
13 - Yeah, I see your point with the third essay. It is definitely more of a story than actually saying...
UndergraduateGokuKetchum - Jan 16, 2014 / GokuKetchum - Feb 1, 2014
|uMich supplemental essay #2 ; I want to be free to ask questions.
4 - I created my own Facebook Page specifically to post the naive questions, while I encounter pondering about nature....
Undergraduateabacada - Jan 31, 2014 / tiaDS - Feb 1, 2014
|Career and Goals essay paragraph needs to be reviewed AND YOU KINDLY !
8 - wow thank you so much could not of explained it better you are amazing my friends god bless !!...
Undergraduatewizdeep - Jan 25, 2014 / wizdeep - Jan 31, 2014
|A warrior spirit never die-Naval Academy:Deeper Meaning/Purpose to earn invitation to USNA
4 - Read your essay out loud over 10 times, seriously. Stand in your room by yourself and read your paper....
UndergraduateCl0ark0 - Jan 30, 2014 / chessmeister89 - Jan 31, 2014
|'I thought I was going to be a cowgirl' UT Austin Undeclared Transfer Essay
8 - Thank you so much! Also, I have to write an essay on an "Issue of Importance." I've narrowed the...
Undergraduateprncsslxn - Jan 27, 2014 / prncsslxn - Jan 31, 2014
|I am a woman. I am pragmatic and unpredictable; Barnard Transfer Essay!
4 - Your style is bombastic and uneven. It reminds me of hollow political oratory. At that, it is not in...
UndergraduateGalPacino - Jan 17, 2014 / Mustafa1991 - Jan 31, 2014
|Diversity, social opportunities, culture, learning environmen- U MICHIGAN - ANN ARBOR
3 - I believe that this essay is great! I did not see any major concerns. Very strong and direct into...
Undergraduatechessmeister89 - Jan 31, 2014 / Cl0ark0 - Jan 31, 2014
|Cornell College (Mount Vernon, IA) Supplemental essays (why apply & passion)
Undergraduateasomegirl - Jan 30, 2014 / asomegirl - Jan 31, 2014
|I irritated everyone around me; UC - world you come from
3 - Ok, you take a good entrance. However, the last sentence about is somewhat contradictory. This confusion occurs due...
Undergraduateilikebands - Jan 26, 2014 / dumi - Jan 31, 2014
|I was not pressured to go to college; UT:Statement of purpose essay
UndergraduateSeeMee - Jan 28, 2014 / SeeMee - Jan 30, 2014
|Memory of my last day of high school; U Washington Personal Statement (Transfer) Summer 14
4 - Can anyone else give me some feedback on this essay? Sending it in today - I'd really appreciate it....
Undergraduateskirt - Jan 29, 2014 / skirt - Jan 30, 2014
|Unpaid Internship at an NGO; USC- Extracurricular activities or work experience
5 - My most recent work experience was working as a voluntary intern for a NGO called Green Lifestyles Network....
UndergraduateSoubia - Jan 25, 2014 / dumi - Jan 30, 2014
|How do you plan to get the most out of your undergraduate education at Victoria College?
Undergraduatebeecky - Jan 30, 2014 / dumi - Jan 30, 2014
|LGBT people - Why Davidson? 'Davidson and I have the same values'
3 - I think it is also good to talk about how Davidson would help you with your specific academic goals...
Undergraduatemenglingziyan - Dec 30, 2013 / dumi - Jan 30, 2014
|University of Michigan supplemental essay #1; Community of dedicated volunteers.
2 - CommutingWhile commuting by a rickshaw one day, I saw a woman in rags squatting in front of a drainage...
Undergraduateabacada - Jan 30, 2014 / dumi - Jan 30, 2014
|'In Bangladesh...' UofM Essay#1 Everyone belongs to many different communities...
4 - What utopia are you talking about? I'm from Bangladesh as well but I would be very careful about...
Undergraduatenanosuit - Jan 29, 2014 / abacada - Jan 30, 2014
|Reasons/ Interest in Eng/ Brave New World; Waterloo Aif
2 - Overall, your essays look organized and clear. Your first two essays were impressive and showed who you are very...
Undergraduatejl95ac - Jan 29, 2014 / asomegirl - Jan 30, 2014
|LGBT. The communities you belong to. Michigan Ann Arbor
3 - Thanks! I wanted to say that I had contact with them during the activities I mentioned above because we...
Undergraduatecoldmountain - Jan 29, 2014 / coldmountain - Jan 30, 2014
|"Why are you taking art history?"; UT-Austin Transfer
Undergraduatetexasbreed13 - Jan 23, 2014 / texasbreed13 - Jan 29, 2014
|Compassion and diversity ; Industrial design -CCA
UndergraduateHamma - Jan 19, 2014 / Bob789 - Jan 29, 2014
|My life's passion is to repair the damage on earth created by humans; Purdue - life goals
UndergraduateOGUNSUSI - Jan 4, 2014 / dumi - Jan 29, 2014
|I was born in the Dominican Republic; Boston University -- General Studies
Undergraduateinesalvarez - Jan 3, 2014 / dumi - Jan 29, 2014
|'A challenge only becomes an obstacle when you bow to it' - Essay for UBC
3 - thank you!...
Undergraduatebecky Y - Jan 28, 2014 / becky Y - Jan 29, 2014
|Stanford- FACEBOOK MATTERS TO ME!
3 - I was trying to say that Facebook expanded to Stanford in it's early ages, like when it was first...
Undergraduatesanatm - Jan 28, 2014 / sanatm - Jan 28, 2014
|I wanted to work as a mechanical engineer; Georgia Tech Writing Supplement-
4 - If you replace "GTech" with any other excellent engineering school, this essay would fit perfectly for that school, as...
UndergraduateZackjam1 - Jan 9, 2014 / sanatm - Jan 28, 2014
|'Growing up in Cerritos, CA' USC COMMON APP SUPPLEMENT extracurricular experience
3 - In terms of content, this essay is absolutely perfect. You discuss the activity, but more importantly, talk about its...
UndergraduateAsakariya - Jan 27, 2014 / admission2012 - Jan 27, 2014
|"No. I want to study Environmental Science";Holy Cross Transfer
Undergraduatebranture - Jan 26, 2014 / branture - Jan 27, 2014
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