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|American Muslim - Rutgers Diversity
Undergraduatetheshdw - Jan 2, 2014 / dumi - Jan 7, 2014
|Muslim pray to Jesus. I have chosen to study in the United States - Essey
2 - I have a few admin requests for you - First, you should have a meaningful title in the subject...
Undergraduaterouteman - Dec 31, 2013 / dumi - Jan 7, 2014
|'When I was eight, I found my safe haven' Playing Volleyball; Columbia - Single Activity
4 - Well, I think you have not answered the prompt well.... You keep telling about your passion about volleyball, but...
Undergraduatechelles - Dec 31, 2013 / dumi - Jan 7, 2014
|The day I turned fourteen; UC boulder admission
Undergraduatejamman2k75 - Jan 6, 2014 / — -
|I had moved to Hawaii from China..Essay about a powerful event in my life and its effects.
Undergraduaterandomtricks - Jan 5, 2014 / jamman2k75 - Jan 6, 2014
|Event and life experience that has had the greatest influence in shaping my character
3 - Quick revisions here (colored): I have realized that there are certain factors that have Drawing inspiration from factors such...
UndergraduateChigozie - Jan 3, 2014 / Cascara - Jan 6, 2014
|"Personal Connections: Architecture and Campus Landmarks" - GWU Supplementary Essay
UndergraduateCascara - Jan 3, 2014 / Cascara - Jan 6, 2014
|'new millennium entrepreneur' Career goals and a community and professional impact, ABD
3 - I like your rich vocabulary :) ____________________________________________________ This legacy entails achieving, working in a desired career path and...
UndergraduateChigozie - Jan 3, 2014 / Cascara - Jan 6, 2014
|"Try not to become a man of success, but a man of value"; Attribute of Personality-MIT
NEW - Please give any feedback you may have, negative or positive, about the essay! If you want me to check...
Undergraduateaof_khristophor - Jan 6, 2014 / — -
|'This is my journey..' Recovering addict that has built a successful life - transfer essay
4 - I really appreciate your thoughts and critiques. I know this topic is number one on the "do not mention"...
Undergraduateflcdn5454 - Jan 3, 2014 / flcdn5454 - Jan 6, 2014
|'I always knew... what I wanted to do...' Motivation Letter for Research Summer School
Undergraduatemancho - Jan 5, 2014 / Cavinstrivehard - Jan 6, 2014
|'Stellar celebrities...' Common Application Essay Prompt 5: Behind The Beauty
NEW - I am an international applicant so I REALLY need help on this essay. Please feel free to critique this...
Undergraduateiamalice - Jan 6, 2014 / — -
|Cornell will be absolutely amazing; Cornell Arts and Science
4 - It is way too general. The idea behind your essay is nicely personal and already gives a little sampling...
Undergraduatereluctantmuggle - Dec 19, 2013 / OMGreeny - Jan 6, 2014
|Want to get into the Soccer team; My Queens Personal Essay
Undergraduateaseru - Jan 5, 2014 / SreeSam - Jan 6, 2014
|I can picture myself doing things I love; Why Tufts Essay
4 - doing anything? or doing things you longed for? Tufts University is a place that I can picture myself...
Undergraduatemadroved - Dec 29, 2013 / dumi - Jan 6, 2014
|My mother's been diagnosed with bipolar disorder; CENTRAL TO IDENTITY
3 - In my view, I don't find much value addition coming from the above lines. Except for the last...
Undergraduatequeeeel - Dec 30, 2013 / dumi - Jan 6, 2014
|Purple is Northwestern but Purple is also Me - Northwestern
2 - I think you should focus more on the programs within Weinberg as well- how can you utilize it and...
Undergraduategogetaklu - Jan 5, 2014 / empirestate - Jan 5, 2014
|'Working with numbers and managing' - what qualities attract/your interests in UMichigan
2 - Remember, the prompt says, "Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School (including...
Undergraduatestrongbomb2 - Jan 5, 2014 / Didgeridoo - Jan 5, 2014
|CU Boulder Supplement- "International Bufallete"
2 - It is the diversity and the inclusive community of CU BoulderCU Boulder's diversity and inclusive community, , among other...
Undergraduatefiftyskye - Dec 30, 2013 / plee24 - Jan 5, 2014
|Well rounded exposure - Why I'm interested in Georgia Tech?
3 - That'd be a good idea. Where did your interest in environmental engineering originate? Answering that question will give the...
Undergraduatevarroyo79 - Jan 4, 2014 / plee24 - Jan 5, 2014
|'Being an engineer takes big responsibility' City College Essay
3 - I really do not know how to start an opening sentence. Any suggestion that can improve my opening sentence....
Undergraduatemyjaymusic95 - Jan 3, 2014 / myjaymusic95 - Jan 5, 2014
|'..my knowledge of Yale is wholly derived from media' Yale answers - International student
3 - My knowledge about Yale is limited to what I learned from media about the university. ...Better...
Undergraduatedorbaruch - Dec 30, 2013 / dumi - Jan 5, 2014
|William Bouguereau ; UVA - What work of art, music, science,mathematics, or literature
3 - Well.... they stress on "What work of art, music, science, mathematics, or literature has surprised, unsettled, or...
Undergraduatemicahmikester - Dec 30, 2013 / dumi - Jan 5, 2014
|1/2 OF MY QUEENS COMMERCE SUPPLEMENTARY ESSAY
Undergraduate500daysoftrisha - Jan 3, 2014 / rohan96 - Jan 5, 2014
|"What can be done about it?; Accomplishment or event
4 - Thanks! I'll incorporate the corrections into my essay. However I somehow feel that the essay needs more depth and...
Undergraduaterohan96 - Jan 4, 2014 / rohan96 - Jan 5, 2014
|Experiences shape who we are and mold the future we will have; extracurricular activity
3 - From the looks of your essay I believe it isn't paragraphed. I would suggest you to chop it into...
Undergraduatejmr213 - Jan 4, 2014 / rohan96 - Jan 5, 2014
|Interact Club - to share ideas with like-minded people who like me, are interested in helping others
UndergraduateFuntena6 - Jan 5, 2014 / Funtena6 - Jan 5, 2014
|How an education at The Art Institute of Philadelphia will help you obtain your goals.
2 - This may be a little harsh, but better from me than from an adcom. Sorry, I don't exactly see...
Undergraduatehirschmugl6 - Jan 4, 2014 / plee24 - Jan 4, 2014
|'As a child, Santa, and later my...' INTELLECTUAL EXPERIENCE/VITALITY ESSAY-STANFORD SUPP
NEW - PROMPT: Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your...
Undergraduatemmitchell32 - Jan 4, 2014 / — -
|The summer of 2012 a fire lit inside me- Why did you apply for UW Madison....
Undergraduatecollegegirlxxx - Jan 3, 2014 / fiftyskye - Jan 4, 2014
|"Kelsey, art extraordinaire" Common App essay about my background in art
Undergraduatekburke652 - Jan 4, 2014 / Asiak - Jan 4, 2014
|Curiosity/New Experience/ Engineering; VCU- Primary goal,Challenging situation
NEW - Let me know if there is anything I should change. My parents have been proofreading, but I want a...
Undergraduatemaddykd - Jan 4, 2014 / — -
|Influence (Family,culture, environment) & Unique qualities/charcteristics; UCF
4 - I am very fortunate to have been raised by two amazing parents who inculcated good morals and values...
Undergraduatetwinlamps - Dec 30, 2013 / dumi - Jan 4, 2014
|"The Clash Between My Worlds" Common app essay help?
3 - ... is that "Bengali" or "Bangladeshi"? You speak Bengali, but you hail from Bangladesh, isn't that so? ...
Undergraduatesaberiz - Dec 29, 2013 / dumi - Jan 4, 2014
|'Thomas Carlyle once said...' My goals in Queen's University and beyond
3 - you have been vague in telling what branch of engineering better use other words than sagacious for profs. excel...
Undergraduatemontezuma64 - Jan 1, 2014 / kishorbhandari - Jan 4, 2014
|An Experience Like No Other. BU Supplement.
2 - you might want to reconsider this sentence Of course, college should not be all work with no play .express...
Undergraduaterianhawaiian - Jan 4, 2014 / kishorbhandari - Jan 4, 2014
|'my desire to change the business world' BU Supplement need proofreading
2 - I have experienced many things throughout my eighteen years of life. No, you don't ! Adcoms usually don't like...
Undergraduatedozo14 - Jan 3, 2014 / joemaxlop - Jan 4, 2014
|'It was the summer holidays of grade 11' Teaching is in my bloodlines...(UIUC prompt 2)
2 - There is several occurrence of "realised" shouldn't it be "realized" instead? Else, I like the tone you are taking...
Undergraduaterohan96 - Jan 3, 2014 / joemaxlop - Jan 4, 2014
|[ University of Toronto ] - Engineering essay ( Why Engineering, Why UofT, What skills..)
NEW - Hi everyone, Here is my work for the University of Toronto prompt: What has inspired you to pursue...
Undergraduatejoemaxlop - Jan 4, 2014 / — -
|"Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities" - USC prompt
UndergraduateJohnGospel - Jan 3, 2014 / 500daysoftrisha - Jan 4, 2014
|'Becoming a doctor' / 'Body language' -Tufts Supplemental Essays
5 - So you mean i should whether agree or disagree, but in the following paragraphs of mine i should say...
Undergraduateshadiali - Dec 29, 2008 / minaf - Jan 4, 2014
|When I am challenged more, then I can work harder; TRANSFER
2 - Having good study groups is very essential because we can work as teams to help better understand a certain...
UndergraduateShugz20 - Jan 3, 2014 / rohan96 - Jan 4, 2014
|I'm Hard Worker - George Washington supplements
Undergraduatebaksh1994 - Jan 3, 2014 / hello_sunshine - Jan 3, 2014
|Why would I want to transfer from a two year Community College to a four year University?
3 - Right now, your essay is a tad generic. It's kind of obvious that a larger university will have more...
UndergraduateShugz20 - Jan 3, 2014 / Didgeridoo - Jan 3, 2014
|Describe a topic central to your identity: My Mother and Poland.
2 - This was a good snapshot of your heritage, but you were right when you said that it isn't enough...
UndergraduateAsiak - Jan 3, 2014 / Didgeridoo - Jan 3, 2014
|I did not come from the land of opportunity or of liberty and freedom; CENTRAL TO IDENTITY
3 - thank you for your help butI'm confused of what you're trying to do. I know my grammar is dad,...
Undergraduatehello_sunshine - Dec 30, 2013 / hello_sunshine - Jan 3, 2014
|In no longer than 250 words tell us why Boston University is a good fit for you.
Undergraduateygicantoo - Jan 3, 2014 / hello_sunshine - Jan 3, 2014
|Tell us about a time you took a risk, failed, and were able to pick up the pieces.
2 - Congrats on being President! I personally liked your essay a lot and how you managed to setup the reader...
UndergraduateEighthHorcrux - Jan 3, 2014 / theshdw - Jan 3, 2014
|Biology and Economics major. The Ideal School for Me - Carnegie Mellon Supplement
3 - I think you did a good job tying economics and biology together. Your essay was clear and succinct....
Undergraduaterbuttar14 - Jan 1, 2014 / Chigozie - Jan 3, 2014
|'isolation and alienation by communities' success can be disastrous?
Undergraduatebraska1 - Jan 3, 2014 / — -
|miracle worker - Notre Dame Supplement: is this on topic?
3 - According to me the above poster has rectified all the errors. You can add some more detail about the...
Undergraduatejoshuazh - Jan 2, 2014 / rohan96 - Jan 3, 2014
|I despise school - I have a story to tell UChicago
3 - It is a very touching story! However, I won't give you a candy. I despise school. Climbing out...
Undergraduatetruongb14 - Jan 3, 2014 / Xenon54 - Jan 3, 2014
|Female Empowerment! Georgetown : Global Issue
NEW - While Georgetown doesnt have a word limit, I would like to cut it down to a page. I suggestions...
Undergraduateadatiger96 - Jan 3, 2014 / — -
|Touching the dogs / Coding months / Mirage life - Stanford
3 - BachChaconne2, thank you so much. I did edit and shorten these a bit more before submitting a few days...
UndergraduateGokuKetchum - Jan 1, 2014 / GokuKetchum - Jan 3, 2014
|I always believed that I wanted to be a model; NYU Bio
4 - I love this idea -- so creative! Although I would elaborate more on how NYU in particular can fulfill...
Undergraduateitsgraci3 - Dec 28, 2013 / 500daysoftrisha - Jan 3, 2014
|Why Boston University? my longing to grow as a person
5 - Woah! That sounds like an interesting major. However, you do not sound too thrilled. Just visit BU's website and...
Undergraduateygicantoo - Jan 2, 2014 / lilly1218 - Jan 3, 2014
|Every summer was the same to me; Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal
2 - Maybe calling yourself an introvert overall will minimize being redundant, maybe take out details that are unnecessary to the...
UndergraduateSkordi - Jan 1, 2014 / ygicantoo - Jan 2, 2014
|GW offers an education &college experience with a truly unique impact &once-in-a-life time
2 - How* to make a living. Take out "in my view" it's not necessary since you are the one writing...
UndergraduateEighthHorcrux - Jan 2, 2014 / ygicantoo - Jan 2, 2014
|Hiring a contractor - unfathomable universe - supplement for Yale
Undergraduategarmin610 - Dec 31, 2013 / plee24 - Jan 2, 2014
|Delirious - The Common App Essay #2 Struggle! Me and my Mountains
UndergraduateShadycurtains - Dec 30, 2013 / BachChaconne2 - Jan 2, 2014
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