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|Brain and Cognitive Sciences at MIT- why major?
Undergraduatequanny - Dec 28, 2013 / quanny - Dec 30, 2013
|Running on our school's track every night; Rice short answer
Undergraduatemmhly2011 - Dec 25, 2013 / Kanadec96 - Dec 30, 2013
|My admiration for my FATHER;University of Toronto - What inspired me to pursue Engineering
3 - Well.... you need to tell them what inspired you pursue an engineering degree and why would you like to...
Undergraduatehanlus - Dec 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 30, 2013
|Who I am? Common Application Essay - Finding my identity
NEW - Could anyone check my essay? I am waiting for your opinions:) Is there anything I should change? Who...
UndergraduateGuest - Dec 30, 2013 / — -
|local private school - COMMON APP PERSONAL STATEMENT
NEW - Please edit my personal statement! Will critique back! "One day, I just looked in the mirror and realized...
Undergraduatemclark13 - Dec 30, 2013 / — -
|Hot tea and Lifetime movies - MIT essay
NEW - Attribute you most proud of. 200-250 words. guys I need your help to correct it. I don't have anyone...
UndergraduateKanadec96 - Dec 30, 2013 / — -
|...seashells, Pokemon cards, and US quarters - UChicago Supplement - Yo soy yo y mi...
3 - Thanks for the read! The "perfect" was supposed to be for the having-to-use-my-imagination part..I'll see if I can clarify...
Undergraduatehelloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013 / helloimyellow - Dec 30, 2013
|Cleanup Day, What are we going to do when we meet up? / Stanford Roommate Essays
Undergraduateprim0rdia1 - Dec 29, 2013 / iacero - Dec 30, 2013
|"Heidi, you good!"; Bowdoin Supplement - Common Good
5 - So you are trying to say that building individual relationships contributes to the Common Good, but people don't notice...
UndergraduateLN4 - Dec 29, 2013 / plee24 - Dec 29, 2013
|passion for social justice/ Kellner Performing Arts Centre ; BARNARD; Why?/ Community
NEW - Hello, could you please check grammar, sentence structure etc thank you. How did you first learn about Barnard...
Undergraduatejojoy3 - Dec 29, 2013 / — -
|'I have been knocked down by grief' Essay about moving on after a death in the family
5 - Ah I see. Well I did understand that you had a flashback moment to your grandma and you taking...
Undergraduatemaddigirl - Dec 29, 2013 / iacero - Dec 29, 2013
|Amherst Supplement-Overcoming Difficulty; Living in Egypt
Undergraduatehannah9501 - Dec 29, 2013 / badra100 - Dec 29, 2013
|unlimited flexibility - WHY PENN ENGINEERING-- supplement
Undergraduatehelloimyellow - Dec 28, 2013 / helloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013
|Botson and Careerlink - BU MY DREAM SCHOOL
4 - I agree with enique94. You should specify those other interests that BU offers and perhaps something specific that students...
UndergraduatePrecious123 - Dec 29, 2013 / Kanyinqt - Dec 29, 2013
|Licking tigers - UCHICAGO- favorites supplement-- Dr. Seuss and painting
4 - Other than the clarifications that were suggested by llsir (I have never heard of Highlights magazine either), which are...
Undergraduatehelloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013 / plee24 - Dec 29, 2013
|"like mother, like son"; Yale Essay B (Mother vs Son)
3 - I agree with quanny; I like that you included an extra anecdote about yourself but the underlying quality of...
Undergraduateakshay1996 - Dec 28, 2013 / plee24 - Dec 29, 2013
|Lego Kits - "My interest in mechanical engineering"- UIUC prompt
4 - Hmmm, well I actually liked both, so I made a hybrid! Version 2 has a better hook, although it...
Undergraduatesupbrahs - Dec 29, 2013 / llsir - Dec 29, 2013
|Duke is a liberal arts college with strong science programs; Why Duke?
4 - llsir Talk about how you'll specifically use what you get at duke to further your learning. Good essay otherwise....
Undergraduatellsir - Dec 29, 2013 / johntasker - Dec 29, 2013
|"It's the possibility that keeps me going, not the guarantee"; UVA Favorite Word
Undergraduateaaamonicaaa - Dec 21, 2013 / aaamonicaaa - Dec 29, 2013
|I disappointed myself the most; childhood to adulthood
UndergraduateFrano297 - Dec 29, 2013 / thekid96 - Dec 29, 2013
|growing up with a sibling - stanford supplement letter to roomate
7 - Great overall message, but i read between the lines. you're trying to hint the AO so please just outwardly...
Undergraduatedarketernaly - Dec 28, 2013 / Hass95 - Dec 29, 2013
|Comments on Yale essays? (Why Yale, Reflection on something you would like to say more)
5 - Kimmykimkim and arda434, yeah grammar is not really my forte, but if you could be more specific on the...
UndergraduateRyxion - Dec 29, 2013 / Ryxion - Dec 29, 2013
|Stanford roomate essay...vampire
9 - Love this! The list-style approach can definitely be a hit or miss but the randomness of your list makes...
Undergraduatemaddigirl - Dec 29, 2013 / helloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013
|Stanford Supplements- The "Teacher"; "Debater"; "Collector"; and "Worker"
Undergraduatekatsen - Dec 28, 2013 / Kristoria - Dec 29, 2013
|WHY UCHICAGO-- where I love coffee, microscopes, and people.
Undergraduatehelloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013 / helloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013
|'Mexican students' Why Upenn? Undergraduate admissions essay
3 - This is too superficial...you need to tell the admissions officers more about yourself. When you mention Civic House Associates...
Undergraduate2014MSETI - Dec 27, 2013 / Oryx97 - Dec 29, 2013
|Stanford intellectual vitality...Turkey
4 - thanks for your help! Good point about bad-mouths. Do have another word in mind? I looked up synonyms...
Undergraduatemaddigirl - Dec 29, 2013 / maddigirl - Dec 29, 2013
|'Colombia' Discuss the subjects in which you excel or have excelled. Success factors.
3 - i think it's a good essay, but I think the factors that attributed to your success can be more...
Undergraduatemaria1995 - Dec 29, 2013 / jsh0011 - Dec 29, 2013
|Closed my laptop - Stanford Intellectual Vitality Essay
Undergraduatecollindching - Dec 29, 2013 / marzmarz - Dec 29, 2013
|University of Rochester Supplemental Essay 2013-2014 (What kind of Meliora Experiences?)
UndergraduateSMINICK975 - Dec 29, 2013 / thenewdude - Dec 29, 2013
|'My heart thumps and my breath gets heavier' EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES-Dartmouth
Undergraduatehelp_p - Dec 29, 2013 / collindching - Dec 29, 2013
|I'm a hoarder - Yale Supplemental essay
6 - I love seeing my collection grow and capturecapturing moments in time where I have experienced something new. As life...
UndergraduateCs417 - Dec 28, 2013 / helloimyellow - Dec 29, 2013
|"She's invincible" Duke and Stanford Supp.: Impact of an extracurricular experience on you
3 - I liked this essay. Through the example you allowed the reader to learn something about you that you got...
Undergraduatellsir - Dec 25, 2013 / Kristoria - Dec 29, 2013
|'The score is 4-4' MIT pleasure activity essay, critique
4 - Thanks for your comment. I did write another essay just now before going to sleep and if anyone can...
UndergraduateAlex61 - Dec 29, 2013 / Alex61 - Dec 29, 2013
|A story about how my international student title shapes me. "Thing unnoticed" UWM
Undergraduatexujunjiejack - Dec 29, 2013 / zadocky - Dec 29, 2013
|"My piano" Common Application Personal Essay - where you are perfectly content
Undergraduatecocamb - Dec 29, 2013 / cocamb - Dec 29, 2013
|I read "Opposite of Loneliness" - yale supp: why yale and a bunch of short answers
4 - I really liked the creativity of your responses, but the last one, letter e, is a little blunt compared...
Undergraduateiloveyogurt - Dec 29, 2013 / cocamb - Dec 29, 2013
|Favorite childhood book and why; Kalamazoo Sup
Undergraduateiacero - Dec 27, 2013 / jordancarf - Dec 29, 2013
|Pakistan - My Struggles as an Immigrant: Common App
UndergraduateTabo1 - Dec 26, 2013 / cocamb - Dec 29, 2013
|'A white piece paper with a huge, red F' - Academic Geek - Describe a challenge
2 - I really liked the tone you had. You were very descriptive, and showed how much you cared to get...
Undergraduatekimmykimkim - Dec 29, 2013 / maria1995 - Dec 29, 2013
|6AM Bus Ride - common app essay option 4 ( time rush)
3 - Thanks a lot for your help. I will critique your new essay as soon as possible:) good luck with...
Undergraduatehoanhthu - Dec 28, 2013 / hoanhthu - Dec 29, 2013
|CAN; UVA supplement - My favorite word
Undergraduatejsh0011 - Dec 28, 2013 / jsh0011 - Dec 29, 2013
|Doctor finishing up with a patient - Williams College ; looking through a window
2 - I think your writing generally can be considered good material for an essay. When applicants are able to connect...
Undergraduatejordancarf - Dec 29, 2013 / OMGreeny - Dec 29, 2013
|Liberty, Fraternity, Equality - CommonApp Essay Prompt 3
UndergraduateAnishG - Dec 29, 2013 / wolflover60 - Dec 29, 2013
|Big-Mouth Laughter - Stanford essay: a letter to future roommate
2 - I have fun reading your essay. Just a small recommendation "But surprisingly, my friends tell me this is another...
Undergraduatesyi0721 - Dec 29, 2013 / hoanhthu - Dec 29, 2013
|Rice short essays - "Why the school of social sciences" and "why rice"
5 - "The Kinder Institute for Urban Research is one example through which I can involve in local community" -> "The...
Undergraduateiloveyogurt - Dec 26, 2013 / hoanhthu - Dec 29, 2013
|Why my favorite word is Triumph. - UVA essay
UndergraduateTabo1 - Dec 29, 2013 / xujunjiejack - Dec 29, 2013
|what matters to me and why: creating change through writing
4 - I think the flow is pretty ok, but I would recommend you to revise "My creativity shines through my...
Undergraduatewolflover60 - Dec 27, 2013 / hoanhthu - Dec 29, 2013
|The Future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams- Brandeis Supplement
Undergraduategama - Dec 29, 2013 / gama - Dec 29, 2013
|'dynamics of society and culture' Agriculture and Life - Cornell Supplement Essay
UndergraduateSilverfern - Dec 29, 2013 / iloveyogurt - Dec 29, 2013
|Getting subbed off and soccer player - Common app essay
3 - I would suggest that you start off immediately with the story of getting subbed off; it helps with getting...
Undergraduatekathmandu123 - Dec 29, 2013 / acewashere - Dec 29, 2013
|I never wanted to be an engineer CMU ENGINEERING SUPPLEMENT.
Undergraduateacewashere - Dec 28, 2013 / acewashere - Dec 29, 2013
|A mature global scholar - Brown [why major] critique
Undergraduatequanny - Dec 28, 2013 / quanny - Dec 29, 2013
|bio-engineer roots - Johns Hopkins University Admission Essay
2 - Very good job, well written essay. Your anecdote about the war vet as well as your reason for wanting...
UndergraduateJunhyeong - Dec 29, 2013 / Tabo1 - Dec 29, 2013
|high school musical songs - Stanford Intellectual Vitality Essay
5 - The conclusion is a bit wordy and can be condensed. Also, it might sound cliched to end with the...
UndergraduateAkuhah - Dec 29, 2013 / GoonerTH14 - Dec 29, 2013
|Chemistry Competition; MIT - Situation didn't go as planned
3 - Well... I think you need to redo this once again. Give more focus to the particular situation that...
UndergraduateJamesBarns - Dec 27, 2013 / dumi - Dec 29, 2013
|Bursting My Bubble - "Intellectual Vitality" Stanford Supplement
11 - The "tree (fear it!)" is a reference to Stanford's unofficial mascot, the tree, present at all football games. But...
UndergraduateGoonerTH14 - Dec 27, 2013 / GoonerTH14 - Dec 29, 2013
|Describing a quirk that's a part of who I am- UVA supplement
2 - solid essay...
Undergraduatean_nie - Dec 29, 2013 / kimmykimkim - Dec 29, 2013
|In Spring, we grow roots.- Princeton Supplement [culture]
2 - the last sentence seems grammatically wrong. But this is a very unique and reflective piece :D THe process seems...
UndergraduateCarolKang22 - Dec 29, 2013 / quanny - Dec 29, 2013
|designing and piloting experiments - mit activity pleasure essay critique
Undergraduatequanny - Dec 28, 2013 / Kristoria - Dec 29, 2013
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